The Pulse

The Pulse Trilogy - 1

by

Shoshanna Evers

1

Manhattan

TWO MONTHS AFTER THE PULSE

EMILY Rosen dropped the can of dog food into her backpack and shivered, her breath making little white puffs in the cold air inside the stairwell of her building. Her own apartment had gotten too cold to keep living in, and her systematic search through the other apartments yielded only a few cans of precious food. No one had a working fireplace, and without fire she’d freeze to death.

She’d have to venture outside her building and find someplace warm to squat in. Emily survived this long by avoiding the military camps and living off scavenged food—but she couldn’t live without heat, not in a New York winter.

The heat had been off since the power went out with the Pulse, followed by running water two days later.

Footsteps sounded in the hall outside the stairwell door. Emily gasped and paused with her hand on the doorknob to her floor. Soldiers.

The sound of spray paint hissing onto the building’s once immaculate white walls permeated through the thick stairwell door. She’d seen the mark before, like a big circle with an X through it. Something about how many alive, how many dead.

The door swung open and she cried out in surprise as two soldiers loomed above her. She turned to run even as an iron grasp gripped her forearm, forcing her to stay put.

“Don’t run,” one soldier said. “We have food for you at Grand Central.”

“Not Grand Central,” she said, her voice sounding raw and foreign to her own ears. “No way.”

“It’s the only FEMA camp left in the city,” the soldier replied. “Forget it, I don’t have the time for this bullshit.” He let her go and turned to the soldier holding the spray paint. “Just change it to say we found three dead on this floor, zero alive. It’ll be true soon enough anyway.”

At the sound of the spray paint marking her fate, Emily realized he was probably right. She’d die if she didn’t take action—and she couldn’t die. Not today, not like this. “Okay. I’ll go with you to the camp. I just need to get my things—my stethoscope.”

“Don’t bother.”

Of course not. If they were taking her to Grand Central, they weren’t planning on using her as a nurse. Not if the rumors were true.

Christopher Mason stomped his feet to warm them up, trying to ignore the growl in his belly. Food was available only three blocks east at the military camp at Grand Central Station, but with martial law in place Mason had to avoid anyone wearing a uniform.

He pulled a dirty recycled soda bottle from his jacket pocket and sipped deeply. The water would fill him up for now. The drops of bleach he poured into it made the shit-water taste like a chlorinated pool kids pissed in, but all that mattered was that it didn’t make him sick. Cholera packed a fatal punch and scared him worse than the soldiers did.

If the army caught him and found out who he really was, they’d shoot him, just like they shot everyone else on lock-down at Rikers after the Pulse. It was pure luck the corrections officer chose that moment to escort Mason to the prison infirmary—that moment right before the power went out and the gennies never kicked on.

No power. No phones. No computers. No backups. No generators—no cars, even. Everything just wham, fried. And no hope of fixing it.

It would’ve been kinder of the terrorists to hit them with a direct nuke. This EMP shit hurt them way worse. The deaths were slower… except for the deaths caused by the soldiers. Those were quick.

Mason absently touched his thigh where the twisted scar lay under his cargo pants. The fences at Rikers may no longer be electrified, but the barbed wire that covered them was still a bitch.

His stomach rumbled. The abandoned cars used to have the occasional food item hidden inside, but Mason had long since scavenged through all of the vehicles down Broadway. He didn’t like going into the apartments if he could avoid it, because of the corpses that stared at him with sightless, glassy eyes and made him gag with their stench.

A lot of people hadn’t made it through the winter without heat, running water, or electricity. The survivors living at Grand Central got federal rations and some semblance of order, but Mason didn’t have the luxury of asking for a handout.

The empty street stretched out before him, cold and unforgiving. A desert made of skyscrapers with no oasis. The rumble of a single engine starting somewhere up the block broke the silence. Mason froze, hefting his rifle up. So much for being alone.

Old trucks worked, anything that didn’t have a modern computer chip in it. The army commandeered all the fifties junkers in the tri-state area, like the one the soldiers drove now.

Ducking behind a stalled taxicab, he held his breath as if he had spotted a tiger on the loose instead of an old pickup truck carrying human cargo—two men with guns and their catch of the day. Three women sat in the back of the truck behind the soldiers with blank faces and distant stares.

“Will you let us eat first?” one of the women asked, her voice carrying easily over the silence in the street.

Mason couldn’t make out the mumbled reply from the soldiers, but the men laughed.

The truck passed Mason without spotting him and he stood, aiming his rifle at one of the soldiers, the laser sight centered over his heart. Mason kept his finger off the trigger. He didn’t kill unless necessary, not anymore.

One woman in a rumpled purple sweatshirt looked back over her shoulder.

Late twenties, perhaps, or maybe younger. Hard to tell with her gaunt face, still beautiful despite the fear creasing her brow. Dark circles deepened her eyes, outlined by a thick black fringe of lashes he could see half a block away. Her dark hair fell to just below her shoulder.

And she looked directly at him as he hid behind his rifle, watching her.

Mason lowered the gun and lifted his finger to his lips in a silent plea that she not give him away. She nodded almost imperceptibly as the truck drove on, zigzagging around the stalled cars.

Poor girl. It wasn’t right—a woman like that carted off to a FEMA camp to be gang-raped in exchange for some federal rations. Just a couple months ago it would have been unthinkable.

The urge to rush forward and grab her, to protect her as his own, nearly overtook him.

But she belonged to the soldiers now—the moment to act gone forever. And he’d never see her again.

Grand Central Terminal, the Tracks

ONE YEAR LATER

Emily’s purple sweatshirt hung off her, loose and dirty.

A man walked toward their subway car and she closed her eyes, as if in sleep. Maybe he’d go by. But if he did, she’d go hungry. She gave up pretending to be passed out.

Jenna, her roommate—if roommate was the appropriate term for the other woman who shared the subway car with her—had taken to the idea of prostitution with remarkable ease. It didn’t seem to bother her that everyone had been reduced to only what they had to barter. Money was useless. Possessions were long gone. Now, many single women had only one thing left—their bodies.

Right now Jenna stood in the doorway of the car, her shirt pulled open to reveal the tops of her full breasts, smiling to the soldiers walking down the tracks.

A tall man with dark skin and a freshly shaved head grinned at Jenna and stepped into the car.

“Whatcha got?” Jenna asked brightly.

The man handed her a dirty Styrofoam cup filled with what smelled like stew. “Extra ration,” he said.

Jenna started to grab for it but the man stopped her.

“First you gotta take care of me,” he said, “ ’fore I take care of you.”

Emily scowled in their direction. “Jesus Christ, just let her eat the damn soup first,” she muttered.

The soldier apparently hadn’t noticed her until now. Shit. He walked over to her and lifted her up by her arm. “You got something to say?”

Emily shook her head, frightened. She really needed to learn to keep her mouth shut, especially if she was trying to be invisible.

“Didn’t think so.”

But keeping her mouth shut wasn’t really her thing. Emily cursed under her breath and averted her eyes, but she could hear the sounds of the man unzipping his pants, and Jenna lying down on the old mattress box. It squeaked for a few minutes, Jenna’s moans indicating she was either getting off or pretending to.

When the soldier left, Jenna picked up the stew and drank most of it noisily. Emily could smell the food and she took a deep breath, wishing she could inhale calories.

“Here,” Jenna said, walking over to her with whatever was left in the Styrofoam cup. “You better eat this.”

“Are you sure?” Emily took the cup from the girl, who nodded. “Thank you.” She swallowed it quickly. It didn’t exactly taste good, but it was food. She couldn’t afford to be picky. No one could.

“Hon,” Jenna said. “You really can’t go around pissing off the soldiers, you know that.”

“I’m going to see if I can scrounge anything up,” Emily said. “I need to get off the Tracks for a while. Clear my head.”

She stepped onto the cold concrete platform and walked briskly past the subway cars, keeping her gaze focused straight ahead to give the other women some semblance of privacy.

The entrance to the main terminal loomed before her, people milling about. But those weren’t the voices she heard.

Emily trembled in the dark, trying to breathe as quietly as possible. She could hear two soldiers in a closed room off to her left talking, but more importantly, she could hear… a radio.

A radio—after a year of zero communication with anyone outside of the city.

How had it not been destroyed when the EMP hit?

She looked around furtively. The wide hallway was empty, although she could see the main terminal ahead. Pressing her ear to the thin wooden door, she held her breath, trying to be as still as humanly possible.

American troops overseas… Static blocked out the next words coming from the radio. Shit. Something about rebuilding. Help is available on the federal level… Even the soldiers who must be stationed by the radio were silent now. She imagined they were like her, trying to hear the tinny voice from the radio. She hadn’t heard anything electronic in over a year, but how long had this been kept a secret? How long had the higher-ups known about this, and kept it from the people living in Grand Central?

The first notes of The Star-Spangled Banner burst through the radio’s speakers, sounding like a scratched old-fashioned record or something. If whoever was on the other side of that transmission wanted her to feel patriotic, then mission accomplished. She was filled with anger at whatever country had brought America to its knees with its damned Pulse. She wanted to scream at them, the invisible enemy, and tell them they couldn’t keep her country down, that America would fight back.

But it wasn’t true. As far she could tell, there had been no counterstrikes—at least none the military cared to tell anyone about. Everyone struggled to survive and nothing else got done. Survival took every second of time and ounce of energy.

But how could they hide a radio? A fucking radio. Communication was all anyone wanted—just to know what the hell was going on.

She wanted to bust into the locked room and tell those soldiers she knew the truth, that despite what Colonel Lanche had told everyone… there was news from the outside.

To think there might be a place outside the city where she could be safe. She needed to hear more, to learn more. How exactly was America rebuilding? What did that mean? If she could escape and find a better life for herself, for her friends, and for everyone suffering at the camp, it would be worth it. Any cost was worth it.

Fear had kept her in place for too long. They had broken her. But this… this news would cause a revolution amongst the women on the Tracks.

Which is why Colonel Lanche would want to silence her if he found out she knew about the radio. A radio that wasn’t supposed to exist.

Her only hope was to get that radio in her possession and escape the military camp. Without getting caught.

Emily awoke hours later, curled up across the hard plastic subway seats, with her mouth covered. Her scream of surprise was muffled by the large, calloused hand.

The darkness kept her from being able to see anything, but she could feel the man’s erection hard against her leg as he lay on top of her.

She bit down hard, tasting blood, and the man yowled, reaching his hand back and slapping Emily’s face.

“What’s wrong?” her roommate Jenna cried out in the dark.

“Shut up, Jenna,” the man growled. It was the Colonel with his hand over her mouth. Emily moaned in recognition.

“Don’t bother with her, come to me,” Jenna purred. Bless her. Emily held her breath, wondering what would happen.

The Colonel didn’t even respond to Jenna’s words. “You cunt, you bit me,” he said, his voice a low growl. He jerked Emily upward until she was standing.

“Come with me,” Colonel Lanche spat, tugging her out of the subway car. He leaned into her ear, his voice low and menacing. “This is what happens when you snoop around.”

He knows. Emily shrieked and kicked at him in mindless fear, earning herself another slap. He threw her down onto the cold concrete subway platform.

How could she convince him she didn’t know about the radio?

A garbage fire burned brightly, and the women standing around it suddenly quieted. Another soldier stepped out of the neighboring car, straightening his clothes. “Sir?” he asked, looking at Lanche’s bleeding hand. A third soldier joined him.

“This bitch attacked me,” he said.

Emily jumped up, scraping her palms as she stumbled again. His words made her tremble. “I wasn’t snooping around, Colonel, I swear. You got bad information—whoever told you differently is a liar.”

As soon as the words flew from her mouth she wished she could take them back. She shouldn’t have said that—not to him, and certainly not in front of his men.

“I’m sorry, I just—” she said, taking a step backward.

A cry escaped her throat as Lanche nodded to one of the other soldiers. “Restrain her.”

A broad-shouldered man in camouflage took her by both arms, effectively holding her in place. Panicked, Emily tried to bolt out of his arms, but he held firm despite a few well-landed kicks to his shins.

“Bring her to the main terminal for punishment,” Lanche ordered.

Emily shrieked as the soldier half-dragged, half-carried her up the ramp to the broken clock by the information booth where disciplinary action was traditionally carried out.

It seemed to take forever to reach the clock and still they were there too soon. Dawn was breaking now and light streamed in through the huge dirty glass windowpanes.

“Get the cane,” Lanche said.

Emily’s throat went dry. She started crying before the cane ever came near her, hating herself for being a blubbering fool. What happened to the strong Emily she’d been before the Pulse? Where had that girl gone?

Lanche’s loud voice and her shameless protests had gathered an audience. “For the crime of insubordination, ten strokes.”

The soldier holding her lifted the back of her shirt roughly, exposing her bare back. The cane was actually the plastic rod from a window blind, she had seen it used on others before. They kept it in the information booth for easy access.

The cane whistled down, hitting her skin with fiery pain.

She squealed without meaning to, then bit her tongue as the cane came down again. The soldier holding her was counting off. She could hear his deep voice reverberating through her body as the Colonel struck her over and over again.

The thought flashed through her mind that she shouldn’t have fought Lanche, but damn it, what else could she do? He couldn’t do that to her.

Of course he could. He was proving it right now.

“Ten.” The final strike felt like it cut her skin. She wailed, exhausted and utterly humiliated as the emaciated faces of the onlookers watched her.

The soldier who was holding her hauled her up onto her feet, letting her shirt fall back over her stinging flesh.

She had to escape—and if she got out of there, the radio was coming with her.

2

Mason pushed open the warehouse door in downtown Manhattan carefully. The rats crawled all over themselves, their tiny squeaks and scuffling feet filling the atmosphere. A pile of little pink rat puppies formed a squirming ball in the corner. Nice.

“Here, ratties,” he said, refilling several bowls with dry dog food and treated water. Returning his attention to the task at hand, Mason hefted the metal pail up and leaned over the barricade. The clanking caused most of the rats to clamber away, but there were too many for them all to escape.

He quickly scooped two thick black rats into his pail. The sound of their frantic little feet scratching against the side of the bucket didn’t faze him like it used to. They were food, not pets.

The hair on the back of his arms raised and he stopped himself before stepping out the door. Something was off. He thought he hadn’t been followed, but the rats were squeaking more than usual.

Men’s voices. Laughter.

Fuck.

Mason grabbed his AR-15 and aimed it at the door, ready to take out whoever the hell wanted to steal his crop of meat.

“Drop it.” The voice came from behind him, followed by the cold barrel of a gun pressed against the back of his neck.

“Fuck.” Mason dropped his weapon, but it still hung around his chest in its sling. How did they do that?

A soldier came up to take his gun and Mason head-butted him. “Don’t take my gun, asshole,” Mason said, ignoring the bloom of pain in his own thick skull from the impact. The guy backed up, holding his nose, blood dripping over his fingers.

There were a bunch of them. Oh, fuck. This kept getting worse and worse. Mason scanned the room quickly.

Five soldiers, armed to the teeth. Gathering up his rats.

“This is private property,” Mason said. “And get your fucking gun off my neck. I promise not to shoot anyone. I know I wouldn’t make it out of here alive if I tried.”

“Smart man,” the voice behind him said.

He felt the pressure of the gun barrel go away. His neck tingled where the barrel had been.

“We’re commandeering these rats as food for the United States Army,” one of the soldiers said. “It’s no longer private property.”

“Wrap ’em up, men,” a soldier said.

“Like hell,” Mason said, lifting his gun.

Then something hit him, and he blacked out.

Mason wasn’t sure how much time had passed before he gained consciousness.

The floor was cool against his cheek. He listened carefully, not hearing any squeaking. His rats were all gone. Moaning, he reached up and touched his head. His hand came away bloody.

Fuck, his head hurt. They’d left him for dead, he realized, struggling to sit up. Did they know who he was? Did they know he was an escaped convict?

Mason gasped and lay back down on the cold hard floor. His eyes drifted shut and he wanted to nod off, to escape the pain that overwhelmed his senses.

But he didn’t have time to sleep this off. He had to get up, had to keep going. If he stopped for too long, they’d find him, and there was no way in hell he was going to let himself get executed by the soldiers. He’d come too far to let it all fall apart now because of a little head trauma.

Mason stood up on shaky knees and let himself back out into the sunlight, pausing to scan the area. The soldiers were gone. So was his gun. Fuck.

Without his gun, he was as good as dead. Well, if he didn’t die from whatever the assholes had done to his head first. He kept his head up, squinting in the sun, blood pounding in his ears as he walked.

He realized he was walking to the emergency room at Roosevelt Hospital. He laughed, then stopped abruptly when the pain washed over him again.

There would be no one to help him at the ER. It would be abandoned. When martial law was put in place after the EMP strike, the army took all the supplies in the city to the main FEMA camp at Grand Central—at least that was what it had looked like from his position on an upper floor of the Grand Hyatt, peering out the window at the movement below.

They shot convicts. He couldn’t be found.

Mason arrived at the entrance to the hospital and tentatively tried the door, surprised when it opened easily. Stepping inside, he looked around in dismay at the mess.

Med carts overturned, emptied out, windows broken, beds stripped of bedding. Mason wandered through the litter. There had to be a supply room somewhere.

Another wave of pain washed over him and he groaned. Gotta keep moving. A small plaque on a painted metal door said MEDICATION ROOM. He gripped the doorknob like a drowning man grabbing a life preserver. Locked.

Mason kicked it hard, but the door didn’t budge. Damn it, he had to get something for the pain before he passed out again. He kicked it once more. Nothing.

He’d need keys, but where would they be? Mason remembered the overturned med cart. He walked over to it, his temple feeling like a cracked egg, and righted the huge, heavy cart.

Keys on a lanyard stuck out of the door on the side of the cart. Mason knew from his trips to the prison infirmary that the keys usually hung around the nurse’s neck, but there were no nurses to be found. Probably lucky for them, Mason mused, considering his state of mind.

But the keys… He picked them up, looking once again at the med cart. It had been cleaned out.

How about the med room? The third key he tried worked and Mason gave a shout of jubilation. It echoed in the empty halls and made his headache worse.

He needed one pill. Just one.

But the med room had been cleaned out, too. The army must’ve taken everything. Cabinets were flung open and lay barren.

Mason felt like crying. At this point he would settle for a fucking bottle of aspirin. Anything.

He screamed in frustration, the pain overwhelming his senses. Leaving the empty med room, he stormed down the corridor, kicking the gurneys as he went. His vision swarmed.

Something clattered to the ground. Mason froze and instinctually went to heft his rifle, forgetting that it was gone. He had no weapon for protection.

“Show yourself!” he yelled.

He heard a muffled gasp. Someone was crying. Soft, high-pitched sobs. A child?

“I’m not gonna hurt you,” Mason said in the general direction of the sound. “I just want to know who’s there.”

No one showed themselves. Mason groaned as it felt like a knife was cutting into his skull from the head wound. He’d pass out soon.

He couldn’t risk being so vulnerable while unconscious… Finding the source of the crying was his priority now, more important even than finding something for his pain.

He moved slowly, quietly, looking under and behind hospital beds. There, huddled in the corner, was a girl, hiding her eyes as if he wouldn’t be able to see her if she couldn’t see him.

Mason stood over her. “What’s your name?”

The girl looked up at him with tearstained brown eyes. No, she wasn’t a girl; he could see that now. A young woman.

“Please,” she whispered. “I’m sorry.”

“What’s your name?” he repeated. “I’m—Tell me who you are.” He had almost slipped, almost told her his name, but he couldn’t risk it.

“Please don’t hurt me,” she whimpered.

“I’m not going to hurt you,” Mason said, trying to make his voice soothing.

“I’m Emily Rosen. I can’t go back. Please don’t make me go back.”

“Go back where, Emily?” He held his pounding head in his hands. Emily seemed to flinch when he moved his arms.

“To Grand Central. I can’t go back to Grand Central.” She seemed panicked now, and she stood up, apparently in some sort of shock.

She cried out like a caged beast when he didn’t move out of her way. “Emily, I won’t make you go back. I don’t give a fuck what you do,” Mason said, dropping to the nearest cot. That wasn’t quite true.

This girl was terrified, and terrified people did crazy things. If he passed out she might steal his gun and shoot him to make sure he didn’t take her back to the camp.

Then he remembered his gun was already gone. He couldn’t even think straight anymore and the pain was getting worse. Moaning, he touched his head.

“What—what’s wrong with you?” she whispered. “Are you injured?”

“The fucking scavengers left me for dead. Took my—” Mason stopped, interrupting himself. He didn’t want to tell her he had no gun, didn’t want her to think he… The pain washed over him again and he couldn’t think straight. “I feel like my skull is fractured or something. I need pain medicine.”

“You shouldn’t really have anything for pain yet, if you have a head injury,” Emily said softly.

“What are you, a doctor?” he asked wryly, his head throbbing.

“No. But I’m a nurse. I used to work here. Before.” Her sobs had quieted, and she was looking at him thoughtfully.

“I just need—” Mason broke off in a strangled cry.

“I can help you,” the girl said, her voice shaky, “but you have to promise to help me.”

“Okay, yes,” Mason said. He didn’t care what he was promising; he’d say anything to stop the pain. “But I need medicine. I don’t care if I shouldn’t, I need it.”

She started to walk away. Mason grabbed her forearm and she cried out, struggling to pull away from his grasp.

“No!” she cried.

“Where are you going?” he demanded, even as he had to shut his eyes against the pain building in his head.

“I know where they keep an extra stash of pills. The army never knew about them, so they didn’t take them.”

“You’re trying to get away,” Mason growled, but he knew it shouldn’t matter. He wanted her to leave, actually.

As long as she didn’t kill him.

“I swear, there’s a locked emergency box of narcotics, enough so if the pharmacy couldn’t get us a med in time there would be extra.” She gingerly took the keys from where he’d dropped them on the cot. “I’ll come back with some. And then I’ll clean up your wound.”

Mason released his grip on her and lay back on the cot. “Hurry.”

She scrambled away from him, the terror written all over her face making him wonder if she’d really return.

Emily took a deep breath and walked down the hall toward the supervisor’s office, holding the keys in her hand. Now was her chance. She could escape, and never see the terrifying man again.

But she couldn’t leave a man in pain like that. All of her years of nursing couldn’t be dissolved so easily. The skin on her back was killing her from the caning, and she slowed her pace. She was stupid to come back here, knowing Roosevelt was shut down.

But when she’d run from the camp, her legs had acted on instinct. They’d taken her on a familiar route, even though the city streets had never felt so sinister and frightening.

Fleeing Grand Central hadn’t been easy, but when everyone had been rounded up for evening rations she’d found the door to the room with the radio unguarded. Maybe if they fed the people more than starvation rations, the guard wouldn’t have had to leave his post to grab his food before it was gone. From what she heard, no one saved uneaten rations when their fellow soldiers missed getting them—instead they stole the food and used it to barter for sex on the Tracks.

She imagined the soldier who was supposed to be guarding the door would be punished for her actions, but if he was anything like the soldiers who visited the Tracks at night, then he deserved whatever he got.

The radio, a tiny, hand-cranked thing, sat on a table in the abandoned room. That was her chance.

The pain from the caning had motivated her into moving, suppressing her fear. At that point she just didn’t even care anymore. Didn’t care if they caught her and killed her.

Once she had the radio hidden in her bag, though, the fear came back. Running was the only option if she wanted to live to see another day. And for five stress-filled minutes during change of shift, the side exit was open. It had taken her three of those five minutes to work up the courage to escape. And then she just ran, ran blindly.

To the hospital.

Emily looked at the keys in her hand. She’d have to make a go of it on her own. It was the only way.

Unless… Her thoughts flew to the large man on the hospital cot. He said he wouldn’t make her go back to Grand Central.

Could she trust him?

Don’t trust anyone, she thought. Never again.

She reached the supervisor’s office and went into the locked cabinet to get the pills. Ten Percocet, which Emily shoved into the pocket of her jeans. She’d give the man two to take the edge off, even though she was worried about his head wound. If he was going to die at least this way he would die comfortably.

It still felt strange to her to take what she needed and not sign it out. Or pay for it. Scavenging whatever was left from a store shelf or a dead man’s house would never feel right.

It’s not like they need it anymore. She refused to let herself feel guilty about it. She turned back around and started walking toward the man. Why hadn’t he told her his name?

Oh God, he’s from the camp. He had to be. They had tracked her down; she knew they would. Looking longingly at the exit, Emily stopped walking.

Escape, now? Or help the man?

Damn it.

She kept walking down the hall, back to the man. She hoped it wasn’t the last thing she’d ever do.

Mason opened his eyes when he felt a cool hand touching his forehead. The Percocet had knocked him out, giving him some blessed relief.

Mason touched his head and breathed in sharply. It was still tender to the touch. Maybe the pain pills had worn off. The room swam in front of him and he moaned.

He felt something cool and wet on his forehead and he closed his eyes again. That felt nice, better at least.

“Oh good,” the woman’s voice said. Emily. “You’re awake. I was worried about you.”

Mason opened his eyes again and looked at her face, peering into his, her brow furrowed in concentration.

It was her. The woman he had seen that day, being carted off. “You—” he started, but then he blacked out again.

She shouldn’t have given him the narcotics. How could she evaluate him properly?

Oh, stop thinking like a nurse, she chided herself. There’s nothing you can do for him but keep him comfortable anyway, so stop acting like you’re prepping him for a CAT scan.

There was something comforting, she supposed, about falling back into old rhythms. Coming back to her old job, with a patient in a hospital bed and not on the floor of a dirty subway car. Being a nurse to this wounded man reminded her that she used to be a strong, capable woman. She could be that way again, no matter what those monsters at Grand Central did to her.

“What’s your name?” she asked softly.

The man looked at her with startlingly blue eyes. He had a handsome face, somewhere underneath the thick stubble that covered his sharp jawline and chin. “Christopher Mason. Call me Mason. Oh shit, I shouldn’t have told you that.”

The man held his head, then looked at his hands, closing his eyes when he saw the blood that came back on his fingers.

“It’s okay, Mason.” Instinct took over and she went into nurse mode. He knew who he was, so that was good. “Do you know where you are?”

“I can’t be here.” The man sat up again, obviously panicked. “They took my rats.”

Rats?

“Look at me,” she said soothingly. “I need to see your pupils.”

She peered into his eyes. In a perfect world, she’d shine a flashlight in them, but there were no flashlights. The only light she had now streamed in through the dirty glass panes of the windows. Man, he was good-looking. Too good-looking. And large.

Mason leaned forward on the cot and grabbed her wrists. “It’s you,” he said groggily.

“I’m Emily, I’m taking care of you,” she said gently. “I’m going to clean your wound. It may hurt.”

“I remember you. I saw you that day, when they picked you up. When you got brought in.”

Emily looked at him in horror. He was from the camp, he had to be. She shrank away from him, feeling her heart race. The washrag hung limply from her hand. Focus, don’t be blinded by fear.

“I remember you. When they took you away, it was me, hiding behind the cab,” Mason said, staring intently into her eyes. “Are you okay?”

She remembered him now, the man who held his finger to his lips. At the time she had assumed he was hiding from the soldiers, just like she had been.

Like she was now.

“You—you’re not one of them?” she asked, hating how weak and scared she sounded.

“No. I’ve got my reasons to hide from the law. Like you, I imagine.”

She laughed, a dry barking sound. “Not like my reason.” Quickly, she quieted herself. The less he knew about her hidden radio, the safer for both of them.

“Are you… Why are you hiding, Mason?” She had to know, as much as she didn’t want to. He was the only man around she could possibly trust—if he truly had nothing to do with the soldiers. As much as she wanted to make it on her own, it didn’t hurt to know who her friends were—and her enemies.

Suddenly, he looked at her suspiciously. “I should never have told you my name.”

“I’m sorry,” Emily whispered. “I saw the tattoo, on your arm. I thought maybe you had been in prison.”

“Do you know what they do to prisoners now, Emily?”

Emily looked at him and cocked her head. “My understanding is they let all the petty criminals go. The ones who were murderers, rapists, pedophiles and psychos they… they shot them. Killed them all so they wouldn’t take up valuable resources.”

“They kill prisoners, huh?” Mason said, staring at her intently, holding her wrists. “So what makes you think I want you spreading rumors about me being in prison?”

“I won’t tell anyone. Not a soul.”

He dropped his hands then, as if suddenly realizing what he was doing. “There’re no computers to track me. No fingerprint files. I’m a blank slate now, and I intend to start over.”

“What did you do?” she whispered.

“I’m not going to hurt you,” he said. “And that’s all you need to know. Understand?”

“Okay,” she said softly, and picked up the rag to finish cleaning his wound, grateful to have a task to keep her focused. He wouldn’t need stitches, but she’d have to check him every fifteen minutes or so for a while to make sure he wasn’t suffering from a brain injury.

Not that she could do anything for him if he was. If his head injury was truly serious, then he would just go to sleep and die. She wasn’t about to do brain surgery. She couldn’t even if she knew how.

His T-shirt was saturated with blood—scalps tend to bleed a lot. “Can you… take off your shirt?” she asked tentatively.

“You don’t have to do this,” he said. His face looked flushed, a deep pink coloring his previously pale cheeks. “I’m not—I don’t expect you to—”

She took a step back. “No! That’s not what I meant. I just—your shirt is ruined. Bloody. I can wash it.”

He turned his face from her for a moment as if trying to compose himself.

“Where you gonna wash it?” he asked as he pulled the filthy shirt over his shoulders.

She glimpsed tight abdominal muscles and an incredibly large, smooth chest before the shirt came completely off. He had a sprinkling of crinkly dark hair leading down around his navel, trailing into the waistband of his cargo pants.

Emily sighed. “I don’t know. But I bet one of the shirts I took with me from Grand Central will fit. Might be a bit tight,” she acknowledged as she ruffled through a worn backpack. “Here.”

It was definitely too small, outlining all of his muscles in stark relief. He panted as if the effort of pulling it on had overexerted him.

“I’m sleepy,” he said, lying back down on the hospital bed. “Thank you for taking care of me, Emily. I’m glad I found you.”

And then he passed out.

Emily fell asleep next to Mason, on the floor by his hospital bed, so exhausted that even thinking about the radio hidden in her backpack wasn’t enough to keep her awake.

The following morning he was still out cold, his breath coming in shallow pants.

No, oh no. She couldn’t believe she’d let him fall asleep with that head injury… What if Mason never woke up? It shouldn’t matter to her, she knew. Thousands had died in the past year. What was one more? But there was something about him.

He terrified and excited her at the same time. That was just stupid—if she learned anything in the military camp it was that she had to see to her own needs first. And what she needed was to get the hell out of New York City.

If she didn’t, her body would be piled high amongst the corpses and burned like the others.

She tried, without luck, to revive Mason all morning. She even risked starting an IV and giving him one of the few remaining bags of IV fluid.

Nothing worked. If it was his time, she supposed, it was his time and she couldn’t do anything about it.

Please, Mason, she thought. Wake up.

3

Mason opened his eyes, his throat feeling raw and dry.

“Oh thank God,” Emily said, throwing her arms around him.

“Wh-what happened?”

“How do you feel?” She hovered above him, her fingers on his neck to check his pulse. She put her hand on his forehead. “How’s your head?”

Sitting up carefully, he took stock of how he felt. “I’m okay. I feel better. Fine, actually.”

She looked at him skeptically. “On a scale of one to ten, how’s your pain level?”

“Three. All that sleep did me good, I think.” He grinned at her. Now that he felt better, he could see her in a new light.

She still looked scared, tired… but beautiful. Man, she was beautiful.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” she asked, her voice wary.

Oh hell. He didn’t want to make her uneasy. God knows what she’d been through at the hands of men. He wasn’t going to be one of those.

“I’d never hurt you, Emily.”

“I know,” she said, but she still seemed uneasy. “I’m just—I’m so glad you’re alive. I was worried.”

“I’m harder to kill than you’d think,” he mused. “Man, I’m starving.”

“I bet you are,” Emily said, smiling now. “Let me get you some broth. I found a can of veggies in the kitchen in the basement while you were sleeping, and I boiled it into a soup to make it last longer. Trick I learned at the camp.”

“I don’t want broth,” he said, standing up, testing his legs. “I need meat.”

“We don’t have any.”

He looked at her. Now that he stood she appeared even tinier to him. She barely came up to his shoulder. “Thank you for taking care of me. You’re a good nurse. I’m lucky I found you.”

Emily blushed. Reaching out, he cupped her face. She stiffened then.

“I’m sorry,” he said, dropping his hand.

“No, I’m sorry. I know you’re not like—” She didn’t finish her thought. He dipped his head down to hers and kissed her soft cheek.

She took a step back.

“Show me where the kitchen is. I need to hunt us some rats.”

Emily couldn’t stop looking at Mason, at his huge body, his large hands, and his beautiful face. His hair was thick and brown and shaggy, but she noticed when she cleaned his scalp wound that he didn’t have lice—practically a miracle considering his living conditions. His blue eyes seemed to see right through to her core whenever he looked in her direction.

What if he knows about the radio?

Impossible. He definitely wasn’t from Grand Central, she believed him on that. But the men at the camp were going to be looking for her, if they weren’t already. She had to get out of the city.

She wished she could go alone, but she knew both her limits and the reality of her situation. Traveling alone was asking for trouble, and she’d had about all the trouble she could handle lately.

If Mason went with her, she’d be protected. She’d have a better chance of making it out of Manhattan with him. So she needed to keep him by her side, no matter what. The thought of a man’s touch after the past months living on the Tracks scared her, but it was the only way.

Sitting next to him, watching the glow in the wastebasket fire he had set to cook their rat meat, she felt a twinge of excitement lining her fear. She could do worse, that was for sure. But why had he been in prison?

What if he was a rapist, or a murderer?

Stop thinking about that, she chided herself. She watched as he licked his fingers clean, polishing off the last of the rat. It had actually tasted quite good. Like barbeque.

Seeing his tongue flick out of his mouth made her imagine him doing other things with his tongue. Her pussy got wet at the thought, and she remembered the chaste kiss he’d given her earlier that day.

They were sitting on a hospital blanket laid out on the cold tile floor, like a strange nighttime picnic. Emily touched Mason’s arm tentatively.

He turned to her, the fire reflecting in his eyes. “Hi,” he said softly.

“Hi.”

He pulled her to him them, kissing her, his lips pressing against hers with a tenderness that melted her fears. “You don’t have to do this,” he whispered.

Which made her want him all the more. Not being forced, being able to choose… It felt nice. “I know. I want to.”

He held her tightly in his strong arms. She could feel his heart beating, steady and slow beneath her palm. He reached up and tentatively caressed her breast, rubbing his palm over her skin, cupping her, as if he were testing the weight of her breasts in his hands.

She arched toward him, needing to feel more contact. His thumb grazed her nipple and she bit back a moan of delight, pressing her breasts into his hands, imploring him with her eyes to continue.

Mason kissed her neck, his breath hot on her cool skin, and she gasped as his mouth trailed lower, placing soft kisses over her shoulders and down to her breasts. When his tongue gently lapped at her nipple, she couldn’t hold back her desire any longer.

“Yes, Mason,” she whispered.

He complied with her unspoken wish and pulled her nipple into his mouth, sucking hard, flicking her nipple with his tongue until it became a tight bud that peaked. As he suckled her he reached up and gently pinched her other nipple, tweaking it in time with his mouth on the other side.

She breathed in and let her head loll back, luxuriating in the sensation after having been untouched by gentle hands in so long.

Mason reached down to her fly and unbuttoned it. She let him, feeling the undeniable inevitability of it all. She was his, and that was good.

“Take off your jeans,” he said. “But… only if you want to.”

She obeyed quickly. It had been a long time since she had made love—too long. The experiences she had since their world had turned upside down didn’t even come close to counting.

But this, this was something she wanted. Needed.

Naked before him, Emily pressed herself against his long, hard body, still clad in his cargo pants. A thick brush of curls covered her pussy where she used to regularly wax it bare, and she hadn’t shaved her legs in almost a year. Would he be turned off?

Then the look of unadulterated desire she felt when she looked at Mason blew any self-consciousness right out of her mind.

He reached between her legs and ran one long finger along her slick folds. Gasping, she clutched his shoulders, steadying herself. He dipped his finger inside her, making a “‘come hither” gesture that perfectly hit her G-spot, and she swooned against him, moaning.

It felt incredible. He lifted her, one hand still buried in her cunt, and she gasped as the movement rocked her hard against his fingers. He laid her on the cot, moving apart her knees with his large hands.

He dipped his head between her thighs, spreading her labia with his hand until her clit, swollen already with anticipation, lay vulnerable and open to his mouth. He sucked her bud, laving it with his merciless tongue, licking her folds once more before capturing her clit again into his hot mouth.

She cried out at the sensation, running her fingers through his shaggy hair, scratching her fingernails over his broad shoulders as he flicked her clitoris over and over again. She exploded into her climax, crying out, gasping for breath, moaning his name into the dark night.

He looked up at her, her moisture still glossing his lips, and grinned. “You’re delicious,” he said, and he licked her clit again.

“Oh my God,” she moaned, the sensation of his tongue on her already overstimulated clit making her crazy with lust.

She halfheartedly tried to push his head away but he grabbed her wrist and held it still against her heaving belly as he continued to suck her clit. He kept going even as she slammed her thighs against his ears, bringing her to a second body-shaking orgasm.

Her body racked with spasms as the muscles contracted again and again.

“Fuck me, Mason. I need you in me, now,” she gasped.

“No, Emily,” he said gently. “Not just yet.” He picked her up from the blanket, her body boneless and satiated.

“I want to return the favor. Please.” She got to her knees, still shaking from the aftershock of her orgasm.

She reached her hands up to his cargo pants tentatively, asking permission with her eyes. She could tell he was hard, even through the pants. He made quick work of dropping them and she smiled, licking her lips.

His cock sprung out, heavy and thick in her palm, so hard it was almost purple. A bead of pre-come clung to the tip of his slit like a tiny jewel.

She took his length in her hand, cupping his balls with her other, loving how vulnerable he had made himself to her, loving the feeling of power it gave her to make him groan like that, even on her knees.

Emily opened her mouth and took the head of his cock in her mouth, rolling her tongue around and around until he groaned and grabbed her head, running his fingers through her hair, urging her to take more of him in her mouth.

She swallowed, cautiously, working his cock into her throat, tasting the musky saltiness of his skin.

She licked the slit, sucking out another bead of the delicious pre-come, and ran her tongue up and down the side of his shaft before drawing him into her mouth once more.

“Emily,” he moaned, his fingers tightening in her hair.

The feel of his hands on her head sent shivers of desire rushing through her and she sucked hard, until she could feel him stiffen in her mouth even more.

He climaxed, ejaculating down her throat, holding her head in place as she swallowed every last drop.

Finally she took her mouth off of him, breathless, and licked her lips.

Mason lay down next to her, wrapping his large arms around her, pulling her close.

“I’m glad you’re okay,” she whispered.

“Yeah, me too. Thank you.”

She almost said, “It’s my job,” but that wasn’t true anymore. What would she do if he wouldn’t help her? She’d go it alone, like always. Before the Pulse she’d been fully capable of taking care of herself. Surely that independent woman was still somewhere deep inside her. “Mason, I have to tell you something.”

He propped himself up on one arm and looked at her. “Shoot.”

“I need to get out of New York City. And I want you to come with me. There’s safety in numbers.” Especially when one of those numbers was a huge man.

He shook his head. “I have a pretty sweet setup—an apartment with a fireplace, plenty of ammo, and another stash of breeding rats I’m hoping the army hasn’t found yet.”

Emily tried to swallow back her disappointment. “I see.”

“I can’t leave, Emily,” he said. “I’m a convict, remember? If I start trying to travel around, I’ll be at risk of being found out. And shot.”

“Of course,” she said. “You’re right. I’m sorry, I should never have asked you to come with me. I’ll go alone, it’ll be fine.”

She turned her face so he wouldn’t see the tears of disappointment filling her eyes. Damn it, why should she cry over his refusal? She had to leave with or without his help so she may as well suck it up.

“Why leave at all?” he asked.

“I can’t go back to the camp, I can’t!” she said, panic starting to seep into her voice.

“Shh,” he said, caressing her back like she was a scared animal. “It’s okay, you don’t ever have to go back.”

“They’ll find me, they’ll take me, I know it.”

“Why would they go through the trouble of finding you in particular? You’re another mouth to feed. They won’t care if you don’t want to stay. Why would they?”

“I know something. A big secret. And—I stole something. So, yeah, they’re gonna look for me. I can’t stay in the city.”

“I wouldn’t worry about stealing something,” Mason said, even as he saw the fear in her eyes. “Everyone’s a thief now, it seems. Those who aren’t, are dead.”

“No, I stole something important.”

Mason looked at her. A gun, he thought. Guns were worth a lot now, especially if she filched some ammo as well. He looked at her with renewed respect. That girl had guts to steal something so important.

“Show me,” he said.

She froze. “Oh God, what if this is a setup? What if you’re a soldier, and you followed me here to get it?”

Mason almost laughed, but he could tell the notion truly terrified her. “I’m not a soldier. I told you.”

She shook her head. “I can’t show you. I can’t.”

Fine. Let her have her secret gun. As long as she didn’t use it on him. “That’s okay. You can keep your secret.”

“No, the secret’s something else. Another reason why I have to escape.”

“There’s nothing to escape to.”

“What if there is?”

“I told you, I’m fine here. I’m not leaving.”

Emily sighed. “But I am. I’ll sleep here tonight and leave in the morning.”

Mason didn’t want her to go, he realized. He’d gotten used to being alone, but he missed having a woman for company. He only had himself to look out for, and that’s the only reason he’d been able to make it this long. If he started making decisions based on the whims of this woman, he’d die.

Either he’d starve to death or he’d be gunned down by the soldiers. No, he couldn’t go with her. And she couldn’t stay with him.

He looked down at her tangled dark hair. Her breath became slower, deeper. She had fallen asleep in his arms.

Hugging her against his chest, he focused on the feel of her warm little body on his. He had to remember this moment forever, because tomorrow, she’d be gone.

Unless…

4

On the Tracks in Grand Central, Jenna picked up her rag and squeezed the cold gray water back into the wash pail. Looking at her body carefully, she scrubbed a speck of dirt off the back of her thigh.

She had grown used to seeing her legs covered with a light coat of fuzz. She barely ever got to bathe properly, much less shave. The powers that be afforded her a daily pail of wash water when most people had to wait a week for one because the soldiers wanted the girls clean.

She still smelled, everyone did. Deodorant wasn’t a priority, and even if it was, the supply was gone.

No trucks came with supplies. The stores weren’t magically filled like they used to be.

The time she used to spend looking at herself in the mirror, before the Pulse, now struck her as obviously overkill. Apparently she was still attractive enough to fuck, even without makeup, perfume, and a blow-dryer, and long after the last of the Botox in her forehead had worn off.

And in Grand Central, being fuckable was pretty much the only thing keeping her healthy and alive. Fortunately for her sanity, she loved sex, though she’d never had a lot of partners before the Pulse.

Not that she didn’t want them—she often fantasized about hooking up with strangers. But society, pre-Pulse society, that is, would have labeled her a slut. Now she labeled herself: a survivor.

Here at the camp Jenna could fuck whoever the hell she wanted without worrying about her reputation. The women were all so malnourished that practically no one got pregnant. The few who did were moved upstairs, off the Tracks. All the more reason to keep having sex with any man around—pregnancy was a rare ticket out of hell. As for spreading STDs, well, no one gave it much thought. It’s not like they had any condoms left, or any STD tests. The very real risk of spreading disease was pushed under the rug and ignored by almost everyone, including herself.

The thought that she might have a sexual addiction had crossed her mind, but if she did, so what? If anything, it saved her life.

Sex was currency here on the Tracks.

Jenna stepped off the stalled subway car onto the underground track and waved to the two soldiers headed her way.

She had met them upstairs while wandering around the main terminal, taking in the bit of sunlight streaming through the huge windows. Down on the Tracks, the numerous garbage fires provided the only light.

She looked at the two soldiers who had come to her subway car with a big smile. Maybe after they hooked up she’d be able to ask if they’d heard anything about Emily.

Her roomie had been missing for days, and Jenna worried about her. She asked around, but no one knew anything… or if they did, they weren’t saying.

Jenna would happily give up eating a full ration to have her friend back. Emily had been like a sister to her since Jenna first came to the Tracks.

“Two of ya, huh?” Jenna asked the soldiers. The thought actually turned her on. She’d never had a threesome with two men before. A woman and a man, yes. But not two men. She felt her pussy clench in excitement.

But, she remembered, business first.

“Whatcha got?” she asked, inviting the men in with a smile.

The taller one wore a nametag on his army camo that said JOHNSON. The other one was Pearce, it seemed. Unless they wore dead men’s uniforms, which was also a possibility.

Pearce grinned and handed her two cigarettes.

Cigarettes! She thought they had all been smoked ages ago. “Wow,” she said, impressed. “Thank you.”

“So you cool with this?” Pearce asked, seeming to genuinely care. That’s sorta sweet.

“Absolutely,” she said, pulling her dirty shirt off and tossing it on the floor of the subway car.

Pearce smiled and both he and Johnson stripped their shirts off.

Jenna felt a rush of heat go through her as the testosterone level surged in the cramped subway car. Wiggling out of her sweat pants, she stood naked before the men.

“You’re beautiful,” Johnson said, his voice tinged with what sounded like awe. Jenna flushed at the compliment.

Reaching down, he touched her nipple, his caress bringing the tip to a hard peak. Jenna arched into his hand, and a moan escaped her lips as Pearce stepped behind her and ran his palms over her ass at the same time.

Oh, that felt nice.

“You like my ass?” she purred, looking over her shoulder at him. He smiled in response and gave it a little hard smack. “Go ahead, baby,” she said, urging him on, “I won’t break.”

Pearce slapped her ass, building up a steady rhythm until she writhed under his touch, pressing against Johnson’s hands as he tweaked her nipples.

She moaned, gasping as Johnson dipped his head down and sucked her nipple into her mouth, biting gently.

Pearce dropped his hand from her ass and slid his finger along her slick folds. “Damn, you are wet for us.”

He dropped to his knees behind her and she spread her legs wider, feeling his tongue as it licked and kissed her spank-reddened flesh.

He pressed one long finger inside her cunt and withdrew it, lubricating her asshole with her own juices.

Johnson dropped to his knees then too and captured her clit in his mouth, flicking it over and over as Pearce kept fingering her from behind, pressing his fingers into her asshole. She bucked against him, needing even more contact.

Jenna loved having Johnson’s mouth on her pussy, but she needed his cock inside her. She ran her hands over his well-muscled shoulders, scraping them with her fingernails, her knees trembling as he brought her to the edge of orgasm.

With Johnson still sucking her clit, Pearce stood up, and she heard the zipper on his pants go down.

The sound of him freeing his cock made her groan with desire. He pressed his hard length against her ass cheek and she wriggled against it.

Spreading her ass cheeks with his large hands, Pearce pressed the head of his cock against her tight asshole, already well lubricated with her cream.

“Breathe,” he murmured in her ear, and, standing behind her, slowly entered her. The feel of Pearce’s cock inside her ass as Johnson sucked her clit made her come instantly, crying out in pleasure.

Pearce continued fucking her ass and Johnson kissed his way up her belly, swirling his tongue around her navel, bypassing her breasts entirely as he kissed her mouth.

Now that Johnson stood Jenna made quick work of his pants, pulling his cock out and stroking it with her hands.

He positioned himself at the entrance of her cunt and she moaned as he thrust into her, hitting her G-spot. She’d never felt so filled before in her life.

“You’re so tight with your ass full of cock,” Johnson whispered, drawing back and thrusting hard into her pussy again, eliciting a moan of passion from her.

She gyrated her hips, loving the feel of both cocks in her, loving the feeling of a hard muscular chest in front of her and another behind her.

She lolled her head back and rested it on Pearce’s chest, feeling the steady thump of his heartbeat as he pounded into her. He nibbled her earlobe, his wet tongue laving her neck and ear, and she nearly came just from that extra stimulation.

Johnson grunted suddenly and pulled out of her, shooting his come in a hot jet across her belly. The sound of his orgasm must have excited the other man, because Pearce thrust harder in her ass now, grabbing her hips and pounding into her until she climaxed again, nearly falling to her knees.

He pulled out and, turning her around so she faced him, kissed her mouth deeply. He roughly fisted his cock until his come spurted onto her belly. The two men’s come mixed together, dribbling down past her navel.

Panting, Jenna lay down across the subway seats, staring past the two soldiers into the dark of the tracks, watching the flame of the garbage fire.

Pearce picked up her washrag from the pail and gently wiped her belly, cleaning off the evidence of their ménage, and wiping her pussy and asshole clean of her own juices.

She lay still, feeling more comforted by this small gesture than by anything else he would have been able to do for her. Unless he could tell her about Emily, to tell her she was all right.

Johnson put her hard-earned cigarette to her lips. “I can go get a light from the fire out there if you want your cig now.”

Jenna nodded, smiling. It had been too long since she’d had a cigarette. “But don’t expect me to share,” she said, laughing.

“Wouldn’t dream of it.”

He ducked out of the subway car, straightening his clothes. When he left, Pearce sat next to her on an empty seat by her head, stroking her hair. It had gone so long without a proper shampooing that she probably looked like a homeless person, she mused.

But then, she was homeless. Weren’t they all?

“Thank you,” Pearce said, “for being cool about the two of us doing you.”

“My pleasure,” she said, the unlit cigarette still dangling from her lips. “Definitely my pleasure.”

Johnson came back then, shielding a tiny flame with his large hand. Carefully, he lit the cigarette in Jenna’s mouth and she inhaled deeply.

She coughed immediately, laughing. “My virgin lungs!” she crowed. It had been way too long since she had inhaled.

The cigarette tasted stale but she got an immediate rush of nicotine, something she hadn’t felt in ages. “We need to start growing tobacco,” she mused.

“That’s a great idea,” Johnson said. “You should tell that to Colonel Lanche.”

Jenna rolled her eyes. She tried to stay as far away from Lanche as possible. “Hey,” she said, sitting up. “You know my roommate, the short girl with the brown hair? Emily?”

Neither man spoke. Did they know something?

“She hasn’t been around the past few days,” Jenna said. “I wondered if anything happened to her. If anyone knew.”

Pearce looked at her with interest. “She’s missing?”

“Yeah, I guess so. Missing.” The word made her shiver.

“Since when?”

“Um, the past few days, I guess. I think. I don’t have a calendar, you know?”

“Hey,” Johnson said to Pearce, “a few days is ago is when the ra—”

“I know,” Pearce said sharply. “Enough.”

The two men looked at each other. What was going on?

“Good luck finding your friend, Jenna,” Pearce said, standing to leave. “Thanks again for the great fuck.”

Jenna watched them leave, puffing her cigarette in the dark of the Tracks.

Emily awoke in Mason’s arms, lying on a blanket on the floor of the abandoned hospital. She felt safe here, protected. Like if the army came to get her, he could keep her safe. Before her time in Grand Central, she’d have had no problem standing up to the soldiers. Now that she was free, she had to find that courage again within herself.

Too bad she’d have to go it alone. She wished she could force Mason to come with her, make him see how much better off they’d be if they could get out of the city.

How ironic, that she snuggled in the arms of a man who’d escaped from prison, when not long ago the thought would have terrified her. It still terrified her a bit. She wanted to know what he’d been doing time for.

No—she was better off not knowing.

She wished she could erase the past few days from her memory. If she never met him she’d never know what she would have to leave behind.

Emily would have to just move forward and be strong. The first time she’d tried to make it without help, the army had picked her up after only a short time. The FEMA camp, meant to be a shelter, had quickly become a prison.

How long would it take them to find her this time, especially now that the army had a reason to come get her?

It wouldn’t take them long. She had been a sitting target, waiting, paralyzed by her fear. She could see that now. Crossing paths with Mason had awakened in her the strength to be a nurse again, and in doing so she’d snapped out of her frightened stupor. Mason, despite needing her help when he first arrived at Roosevelt, had the skills to make it on his own. He survived an actual confrontation with the soldiers, even. He didn’t get taken, or killed.

If only he still had his gun. When the EMP had hit, anyone who had a gun, legally or otherwise—and in New York City very few people had a legal firearm, since they were banned—had to give it up.

Homes were searched and guns were seized as property of the United States Army, or more specifically, the band of soldiers led by Colonel Lanche.

But when only the soldiers had guns, no one could protect themselves against them. With martial law in effect, if any man tried to use a gun for protection, that gun got confiscated.

And more often than not, the man got shot, or beaten and left for dead, like Mason did, to save ammo.

Without guns, people had no ability to hunt. Emily liked to imagine that somewhere in the country people had their old rifles and were hunting deer and eating comfortably through the winter… but who knew?

There weren’t many deer in the city, that’s for sure. Either way, no hunting meant even more reliance on the military—they controlled the rations. They even guarded Central Park, the one place in the city where they grew food, so no one could get in.

If Emily had a gun, she would have a chance at freedom, at getting away. But, no use crying over spilt milk. Mason’s gun was gone.

He stirred, his eyes opening. Smiling, Emily looked into his blue eyes. “Good morning,” she said.

“ ’Morning.” Mason sat up, looking around. “Did you sleep okay?”

“I think I slept better than I have since the power went out,” she said truthfully. “I felt safe last night for the first time in over a year.”

He nodded and pulled on a shirt. The air had a chill to it, one of those spring mornings when they’d normally still have heat on. Their fire died in the night.

Emily knew she should go soon, but she didn’t want to leave the security of his arms. This was ridiculous, she barely knew him. He was a stranger—a dangerous stranger, at that. A criminal.

She had to know. “Why were you in prison, Mason?”

Mason bristled at her words. He stood up, stretching. She looked up at him, waiting.

“I won’t hurt you,” he said finally.

“I know, you said that already. But how can I trust you if I don’t know anything about you?”

“You probably shouldn’t trust me,” he said. “Only trust yourself. It’s the only way to make it in this world.”

“Well, I may be independent, but I’m smart too,” she said. “Smart enough to know that I need help. I need your help.”

Mason shook his head. “You should eat before you go. Wait here, I’ll round something up.”

Mason had to get away from her—away from those searching eyes and that soft brown hair. He could barely take care of himself, he couldn’t take care of her too.

But sending her off on her own was akin to a suicide mission.

He’d forget her soon enough, he had to. It was the only way.

Slipping down the stairway to the kitchen, Mason looked halfheartedly for some rats, but they were all in hiding. Maybe he’d find some forgotten cans of food hidden in the bowels of the hospital kitchen. Anything would do.

What if she got hurt? What if she ended up curled in a little ball, hiding behind a hospital bed again?

No, that wouldn’t happen. Emily had obviously been through some sort of shock when he first found her, but something about taking care of him when he needed help shook her back to her senses. The strong woman who saved his life would never end up hiding again. Which meant she’d go off without fear of the very real dangers that surrounded them. She could get hurt, whether she knew it or not.

Damn it. He couldn’t let her go off on her own. She’d have to stay with him, at his place.

But what would that mean? Asking her to shack up with him would mean promising to take care of her, to provide for her. He couldn’t handle that kind of responsibility, not for a woman he barely even knew.

That woman saved your life, he thought. Fuck. How could he not take her in?

Her femininity also presented a problem. Why couldn’t he have found a man instead of a beautiful woman? He definitely didn’t want her to feel coerced to have sex. Especially since Emily extricated herself from a situation where, if the rumors were true, she might’ve been forced to have sex to survive in the military camp.

The thought of her being made to prostitute herself turned his blood to fire as the anger rushed through him.

He would not have her thinking she had to sleep with him to be safe. Mason wanted her, of course. How could he not? He was a red-blooded man. And Emily was beautiful.

Really beautiful.

Images of her sucking him off filled his mind and he could feel his cock twitch in his pants. Just the thought of her got him hard.

But if she slept with him, it would be because she felt like that’s what she had to do to survive, and he couldn’t live with himself if that was the case. She had to understand that he wasn’t going to fuck her, not against her will—and not if she was only “willing” because she wanted to get him to protect her.

He had to figure out why she’d thrown herself at him. He was glad he hadn’t slept with her last night, as much as he wanted to… wanted her.

Remembering the way her slick pussy tasted, Mason groaned as his cock raised, rubbing against the rough fabric of his cargo pants. He wanted to taste her again.

Maybe… if she got wet for him, maybe he could take that to mean she really did want him. Not to pay her way, so to speak, but because she desired him the way he found himself desiring her.

He imagined running his fingers along her pussy, sticking his finger inside her cunt, discovering for himself how much she truly wanted him to fuck her.

His erection throbbed. Shaking his head, he continued his search through the hospital kitchen. Mason flung open a back cabinet and nearly whooped with joy at his discovery—a huge can of potatoes.

How are those still here?

He could see some broken glass directly in front of the can, creating a small, easily overcome barrier. Apparently whoever cleaned this place out the first go-around decided it wasn’t worth the time to get the single can.

Well, Mason had plenty of time—probably the only thing he had plenty of. He got the can of potatoes without so much as scratching himself and set back to get Emily. The thought of her face lighting up when she saw breakfast was enough to make him take the stairs double time.

When he got back to where she stood over the rekindled fire, he had to stop and admire her beauty. She was a target, for sure. But not for the reason she thought.

Then again, if she really had stolen something valuable, like a gun, that could be a definite asset. And, for her, a potential liability.

She glanced up at him and he grinned. “Potatoes,” he said, holding up the can.

“Potatoes!” she repeated, smiling. “That’s perfect.”

Mason snapped open his utility knife and stabbed deep into the can, carefully tearing it open. “We can cook them in the can,” he offered.

“Um, I know this seems gross, but there are some metal bedpans,” Emily said. “They’re sterilized, I swear. It might make a good pot for potato soup.”

Mason frowned. Why not. “Sure.”

Emily came back a moment later with an admittedly clean metal bedpan and started boiling water to add the canned potatoes to. She turned to him. “We shouldn’t watch the water boil, it will take longer.”

He laughed, but as she came up to him, wrapping her arms around his neck, his face grew serious. “What are you doing?”

“Helping you pass the time,” she said, looking up into his face with a small smile.

“Why are you doing this?” he asked. He couldn’t have her coming onto him out of a misguided sense of obligation.

“I—you’ve been so nice to me. I want to return the favor.”

He pushed her away, gently. “No. No thank you.”

She looked confused, hurt. “You don’t like me.”

He shook his head. “I don’t want you prostituting yourself.”

“That’s what I am to you, huh?” she asked bitterly. “A prostitute.”

Mason sighed. It had been a long time since he’d had to keep up any sort of conversation, and apparently his skills, if he ever had any, were fading with time spent alone—first in prison, then on the streets after the EMP.

“I don’t care what you are,” he said. “You do what you have to do to survive. But not—not with me. I don’t want you thinking you have to sleep with me in exchange for protection.”

“Don’t I, though?” she asked, her voice deadly calm. “You won’t come with me. You don’t want me around. How can I convince you to keep me safe? What do I need to do?”

She pulled her shirt off then, exposing her small breasts, the nipples immediately hardening in the cool air.

5

Mason turned away from Emily, heat rising in his face at the sight of her naked breasts, and groaned inwardly. She was making this difficult for him.

Damn it.

He felt her hands on his back, touching his shoulders through the thin material of his T-shirt. He had to stop her, had to show her this was not the way.

Growling, he turned and faced her, pulling her toward him with such ferocity she gasped.

“Is this what you want?” he hissed. “To be used for my pleasure, just so I’ll take care of you? Is this what you want?”

She trembled in his arms and he realized a tear had rolled down her cheek. It left a clean streak through the light dusting of soot that smudged her face.

Emily pulled away. Turning her back on him, she picked up the can of potatoes with shaking hands and emptied it into the now boiling water.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, picking her shirt up off the floor. “Here, put this on.”

She took it from him, not looking him in the eye. She’d wiped away her tears, but her face held a stony determination that concerned him.

“What’s wrong, Emily?”

“I can’t go back to the Tracks.”

“No one says you have to.”

“But you won’t go with me.”

“No,” he agreed. “I can’t leave. I won’t.”

Emily nodded, looking into the pot of soup. “I appreciate that you aren’t forcing me to… earn my keep. But, I want to. I really do.”

Mason wished he could plug his ears like a child so he didn’t have to listen to her tempting him.

He could ravish her right then and there on the floor if he chose to—why did she push him? “You should be glad I’m leaving you be.”

Emily ate her hot potato soup, enjoying it even more since she wasn’t as starving as usual.

Mason looked at her. “You can’t leave, Emily.”

She paused with the mug halfway to her lips at this pronouncement. “I have to. I have no choice.”

“You do have a choice,” he said, setting his mug down. “Come stay with me.”

Stay with him? The thought sounded lovely—and frightening. She still had no idea what sort of criminal he’d been.

He seemed so… good, though, deep down. Like maybe he had gotten caught up in some sort of burglary by accident as a young man, but now he was reformed. Maybe truly regretted whatever he did that had sent him to Rikers.

Could she live with a criminal? She glanced at him, sipping from her mug to give herself time to answer.

“Why,” she asked, “do you want me to stay with you if you have no intention of sleeping with me?”

He scowled. “Then don’t stay with me. I don’t care. I just—I wanted to give you an option.”

“I can’t stay in New York. They’ll catch me,” she said finally. “I have to leave.”

“You may as well shoot yourself now, then.”

Emily gasped. “What are you talking about?”

“You need me to protect you, you said it yourself. And since I’m not leaving, you shouldn’t either. That’s all.” He looked away. “Forget I said anything.”

He was probably right. She could die escaping on her own. But what choice did she have? If she stayed in New York the military would find her. And she would definitely be killed then, or worse.

She couldn’t—wouldn’t—go back to Grand Central.

They ate in awkward silence. Emily enjoyed the soup, perfect on a cold morning. Funny how her tastes had changed since the Pulse.

She wanted to sneak off and listen to the radio, to try to get it to work for her. She had been too scared to mess around with it when she first stole it, but now it beckoned her from her worn backpack, calling for her to fiddle with it.

Why did this radio work, when none of the others did?

And how, how on earth could something be broadcast on the radio? Wasn’t every place hit as bad as New York City? If the attack hadn’t devastated all of America, then help would have arrived by now. The silence from the rest of the country was a deafening testament to the scope of destruction.

“Mason?” she asked, sipping the last of the soup out of her mug.

He looked at her warily, as if he was afraid she might try to jump his bones again. “What?”

“Do you know what happened?”

“What happened, when?”

“The attack. The war, I guess. One minute everything was… normal…”

Mason nodded and she paused, allowing herself the luxury of reminiscing for a moment. She had taken it all for granted. Electricity. Running water. Cars. If she could get it all back, she’d be grateful every time she flipped a light switch or turned on a faucet.

“The next thing I know,” she continued, “we were all thrown back to the dark ages. I know it was the Pulse. I mean, an EMP. But I don’t get it, not really. Why doesn’t anything work? Why didn’t generators kick on? Why haven’t they been able to get the power back on like it used to be?”

“That’s a lot of questions,” he murmured.

“Do you even know?”

“Yeah, I know,” he said. “Unfortunately.”

Emily looked at him with interest. His tousled hair fell in his face but she resisted the urge to sweep it out of his eyes.

“I don’t know,” she said. “You just hear… nuclear. And it makes you think—well, when everyone started saying there’d been a nuclear strike against the US, I really expected—something different, I guess.”

“Like what?”

“Explosions. Mushroom clouds. Fallout. Radiation sickness…” She looked into her empty mug and sighed. “But there wasn’t anything like that.”

“No,” Mason agreed. “I imagine they fired just one nuke, right above the center of Kansas. If they shot it up high enough into the atmosphere, there wouldn’t be any explosion or even fallout. Just a big ol’ Pulse, wiping out everything.”

“The generators too, though? I mean, that was everyone’s backup plan for a big power outage.”

“Yeah, I know. That’s how I got out of Rikers. Everything got fried.”

But what about the secret radio? she wondered. Why—how does that still work? “Is it possible some things still work, though?”

She didn’t trust him yet to tell him her secret, but hopefully she could get enough information out of him without making him suspicious.

“Well, old cars, as you know. If they didn’t have computer chips in them, they were okay. And some people prepared for an EMP and put some stuff—walkie-talkies, radios, that sort of thing—into a Faraday cage.”

Her face must have registered her confusion, because Mason explained what he meant.

“Yeah, it protects stuff inside from an EMP. People made them themselves, you know—survivalists, that sort of type.”

“How the hell do you know about this stuff?” she asked. Then it hit her.

Oh God—he’s in the military after all, she realized. How else could he know? She stood up suddenly, stumbling over her feet.

“What’s wrong?”

She shook her head, not trusting her voice. Of course he didn’t want her to leave. If she left, he’d never find the stolen radio. How could she have been so naïve? She never should have trusted him.

“I—nothing’s wrong,” she lied. “I just—” Her pulse raced as Mason stood up, towering over her.

This is why he didn’t want me to leave. This is why he told me to stay with him.

She felt panicked, her breath closing up as she struggled to wrap her mind around the danger in which she had inadvertently placed herself. Emily took a shaky breath, stepping backward.

He leaned down, capturing her mouth with his. “Stay with me,” he whispered against her lips.

“No, Mason,” she gasped. His mouth left her panting lips, kissing her neck, running his hands down her arms. “I—I—” All rational thought left her as he pulled her shirt off her, up over her head, and tossed it on the floor. “I thought you didn’t want me.”

“Are you kidding? Of course I want you,” he said softly, dropping his hand to her breast, running his fingers over her nipple. “I need to make sure you want me.”

She did want him. She’d never desired anyone more in her life… but he terrified her.

What if the very man she had asked to protect her turned out to be the enemy? Even if he wasn’t army, he was a criminal.

So if she shouldn’t be doing this, then why did everything feel so damn good?

Her nipples hardened under his tender caress. He stepped closer, pressing his hard thigh between her legs, forcing them wide, pushing against her throbbing clit through her jeans.

He rubbed her between her legs, running his hands up her inner thighs, stopping briefly—too briefly—to rub her pussy through her clothing.

“I need to know you want me,” he repeated, sliding his hand into her waistband. “Are you wet for me?”

Oh yes. She could feel the moisture pooling even now, as he slid his thumb across her mound, running his fingers over her wet core.

“I do want you,” she admitted, even though it seemed painfully clear. He rubbed her clit and her pussy clenched in anticipation.

“I know that now,” he said. “So if you really want me… you can see I want you.”

Emily’s knees went weak at his words, and his fingers—oh God, his fingers kept going, building a steady rhythm that had her panting with need.

Suddenly he looked around and said, “I can’t fuck you on a cold, dirty hospital floor. There’s gotta be a proper bed around here.”

“Of course,” she said, nearly wailing as he removed his hand from her jeans. “Down the hall, we can go into a room and use a hospital bed.”

He picked her up, holding her against his chest. She laid her head on his muscular torso, feeling his heart beating steadily beneath her cheek. She loved the feel of being held in his arms as he carried her down the corridor, his head swiveling right and left as he searched for an appropriate location to consummate their lust.

“Perfect,” he murmured, carrying her over the threshold into a small private hospital room with what looked like a clean bed. He tossed her on her back so she lay with her legs draped over the side. “Hold on to the rail,” he ordered.

Gripping the cold metal rail, she held fast as he shimmied her jeans off her legs, leaving her naked, the scent of her arousal filling the air.

He tore his own shirt off and she smiled. He was so incredible-looking—

—what if he’s the enemy—

—don’t trust him, this is all a trap—

No! She thrust the thoughts out of her mind. It didn’t matter what he did to her, she’d never reveal her secrets before she was ready, if ever. So what was the harm in having a little much-needed fun first? She could always leave after. But now… now she needed him. All of him.

He buried his face in her pussy and latched on to her clit like he was starving.

Spreading her thighs as wide as they could go, he licked her again and again until she climaxed, the waves of her orgasm washing over her like a dam had broken.

Her body spasmed as he hoisted himself over her, straightening her out on the bed so their bodies touched.

His weight felt so right, so good, as he held himself up a bit on his elbows, staring into her eyes. Mason kissed her then, and she tasted herself on his lips. The taste of her own pussy drove her wild with need and she circled her hips up against his cock.

She could feel the hard, throbbing length of him as he kept her pinned beneath him. A tiny drip of pre-come dripped down her inner thigh and she moaned.

“Please, Mason, fuck me. I need you in me.”

Mason hovered over her, doubt suddenly clouding his mind. Was this right? He was taking advantage of her. But her moans, her writhing beneath him—he groaned, his cock millimeters from her moist cunt.

“You want this?” he asked, one last time.

“God yes,” she whimpered, and he thrust himself inside her. Her pussy clenched around him and he had to struggle to go slowly, to ease into her, opening her to him.

She felt so good… too good. He slowed even more, pulling out to the head of his cock, and slid into her again, feeling the wet heat surround him.

How could he let this girl leave?

Staring down into her beautiful brown eyes, he knew if he let her go he’d never forgive himself. What happened to his sister Stephanie might happen to Emily, and then what?

He shook his head, pushing the thought of Stephanie out of his mind. He wanted to focus completely on Emily now.

He slid his hands beneath her ass, massaging the warm flesh as he gripped her ass cheeks hard, pulling her up, tilting her pelvis so he pounded into her in a way that made her face flush as she gasped.

“You like that?”

“Don’t stop, Mason, don’t stop,” she begged, clutching his shoulders as he kept up the pace. Her body stiffened and then relaxed in his arms, her pussy clenching his cock spasmodically as she climaxed.

Grunting, he pulled out of her. He was going to come soon too, and he wanted to see her mouth on his cock before he did.

Straddling her head, Mason pressed his cock against her lips. She opened her mouth hungrily, sucking his cock past her lips as if she could read his mind.

“Swallow it all, Emily,” he said, holding her head still with his hands as he fucked her mouth. She murmured her agreement eagerly and the vibration of her throat made him come, crying out with desire as she sucked every last drop from him.

He carefully extricated himself from her mouth and lay next to her on the narrow bed, still breathing heavily. He hadn’t had sex in a long time. Too long—and he’d never had sex that good.

There was something about Emily that turned him on in a way no other woman had. “It’s been so long for me,” he said, barely aware he’d spoken aloud.

“Because you were in prison,” she said softly.

Mason sighed. She deserved the truth—if she knew the truth, she could make a decision as to whether or not she wanted him around like she thought she did. If he didn’t tell her why he’d been in prison, it was as bad as lying to her. She had to know.

He nodded. “Yeah.”

“I know you won’t hurt me, Mason,” she whispered.

“No,” he agreed. “I won’t ever hurt you.”

“So tell me.”

Sighing, he looked up at the cracked white ceiling. “I was at Rikers waiting to be sentenced. They were gonna ship me upstate.”

“For what?”

“Murder.”

She stifled a gasp. “But—but, you were innocent, right? You didn’t do it?”

“No,” he admitted. “I did it.”

“Was it—a crime of passion?”

He wondered if she thought a crime of passion was more forgivable. After all, some people could understand the idea of snapping, temporary insanity—but it was still murder. He had to tell her what really happened. She deserved the truth.

“I don’t know,” he said. “But either way it doesn’t change the outcome.”

“How do I know you won’t kill me, if not now, then—at some point in the future?”

He laughed, but she looked dead serious. “I don’t go around killing people for fun, you know. I’m not a serial killer or something.”

“Can you promise me—can you swear to God you’ll never kill anyone again?”

Mason thought about it. His first instinct was to say yes, he promised—but he never made a promise he couldn’t keep, and if anyone ever tried to hurt Emily, he’d kill them. Simple as that. So no, he couldn’t promise.

He shook his head. “There are reasons for killing, Emily. I’m sure that doesn’t make sense to a girl like you, but… there are reasons to kill.”

Emily lay as still as she could in the bed next to Mason. She couldn’t believe what she had just learned. He was an actual murderer?

It was worse—way worse—than she could have imagined. How could she trust him with her safety now? But then, how could she not?

He wasn’t with the military, but he could be a different type of danger. A very real danger to her well-being.

She was all alone with an escaped murderer—an escaped murderer who made her come harder than she’d ever come before.

The sex had been phenomenal. She’d almost forgotten what it could be like, when she got so thoroughly turned on. It felt amazing. But what about Mason’s victim… the woman he killed. Did she have amazing sex with him too? Did he promise her that he’d never hurt her?

She shivered, and Mason wrapped his huge arm around her, hugging her to him for warmth. But it wasn’t the chill in the air that made her cold.

It was fear.

6

Grand Central, OCC

COLONEL LANCHE

IN THE Operations Control Center at Grand Central, Colonel Lanche stepped forward until he stood only an inch from Private Pearce’s face. “Are you telling me the radio is gone?”

Pearce winced. “Missing, yes sir.”

“I said,” he spat, “are you telling me our only communication with the outside world is gone?”

Pearce blanched, a tiny drop of Lanche’s spittle sitting on his cheek. Lanche stayed in his face, daring him to wipe the spit away. Pearce wisely didn’t budge.

Not that Lanche wanted communication with the outside world. Here, in Grand Central, he reigned supreme.

He had an army of eager young soldiers to do whatever he said. He had a harem of willing sluts to fuck. He had plenty to eat, since he always gave himself a double ration and he always ate first.

Why would he want to let anyone come in and ruin a good thing?

Hell, everyone practically fell over their feet to thank him for saving their asses. If they knew, though, what other leaders were doing—if they knew that in other parts of the country, rebuilding had already begun, and small-town farming communities were cropping up with the help of the Amish—it would be a different story.

Colonel Lanche never thought the Amish, of all people, would end up being so damn useful. In fact, he never thought of them at all, other than as a random sect of people to honk at if he got stuck behind one of their stupid buggies in Pennsylvania.

The other folks, though, he had always known would come out on top in a crisis like the Pulse. Survivalists. They had been prepared for an EMP, and now all the people who had laughed at them before the Pulse were begging for their help.

If the residents of Grand Central knew how much better they could have it if they were able to get out of this godforsaken city, they would never let him lead.

They would revolt.

Lanche needed that radio back. Without it, he was as good as dead.

“Where the fuck is my radio?” he asked quietly.

Johnson, who had been standing silently next to Pearce, said in a shaky voice, “The radio, sir, went missing around the same time that a… a girl went missing.”

“A girl?” The thought that one of his harem betrayed him, hell, had actually been able to find his radio and sneak off with it, seemed insane. But then, there was that bitch he’d caned for snooping around near the OCC. It was all they had to go on. “Where did you hear this?”

“One of the whores asked us about her missing roommate, sir,” Pearce admitted.

“A whore, huh? Does she know about the radio?” Lanche asked.

“I don’t think so, sir. She didn’t say anything about it.”

“But she might know where the missing girl is,” Lanche said thoughtfully. “And if we find the girl—”

“We find the radio,” Johnson finished for him. “Sir.”

“Bring the whore to me. I’ve got some questions to ask her.” Lanche dismissed the two soldiers with a gesture. “Oh, and Pearce,” he said, stopping the man at the door. “Bring me the cane in case we need to motivate her.”

Pearce paled, but he nodded. The two men left.

Lanche sat down heavily. Everything depended on getting that radio back. If he couldn’t get the radio, he’d have to kill anyone who knew about it who wasn’t on his side.

That radio supplied vital information, since someone who knew what went on at the Federal Emergency Management Agency would periodically broadcast.

FEMA headquarters apparently had been less hard hit than most places.

According to the vice-president’s speech on the radio, the FEMA buildings were dome-shaped, earth-bermed structures. Under the earth a copper mesh extended out from the base secured by grounding rods, which helped keep the Pulse from destroying the electronics inside.

Of course, without power, vehicles, and planes to transport supplies—hell, without supplies—FEMA was practically useless. But the headquarters were there, and that was a start.

They’d been able to help him get set up. Given him authority to run the camp. Authority to do whatever it took to keep the people safe.

And they were only safe if they were under control.

The vice-president had taken charge since the president had gone down on Air Force One, along with thousands of other planes that had been flying when the EMP hit.

Every plane crashed simultaneously. The wreckage over JFK and LaGuardia alone had been incredible, so Lanche could only imagine the rest of the country.

Pearce and Johnson came back, leading a terrified-looking young woman with dirty blonde hair. Hope glimmered in her eyes when she saw Colonel Lanche.

“Hello, sir,” she said, her voice shaky. “We’ve met before. I’m Jenna.”

Lanche nodded, eying her. He didn’t say a word. In his experience, the less he spoke the more the person he interrogated did.

The best part was, she didn’t know yet that it was an interrogation.

“Private Pearce told me you were worried about my missing friend,” she said. “Frankly, sir, I’m surprised you care—but I appreciate it. Of course.”

He smiled broadly, first at her, then at Pearce for being so ingenious. He might not need to cane the girl after all. That’s too bad.

“I care about the well-being of all of our residents here at the camp,” Lanche said in what he hoped was a soothing voice. “It’s a very dangerous world out there. If your friend is missing, we must find her.”

Jenna nodded, a tear rolling down her cheek. “You don’t think she got hurt, or kidnapped, do you? Oh God—”

Lanche pulled a chair out and gestured for her to sit down, which she did. Lanche remained standing to remind her who was in charge.

“Gentlemen, you may go,” he said, dismissing the soldiers.

Jenna looked startled to find herself alone with Lanche, and he pressed the advantage.

“Did you see your friend go, perhaps?” he asked sternly.

“N-no.”

“Did she tell you about anything—any reason she may have for leaving?”

Suddenly a cloud passed over the girl’s eyes and she tilted her head as if listening to a far off sound. When she looked back at Lanche, he could see she would no longer be as cooperative as he’d hoped.

Perhaps he would get to use his cane on her after all.

Jenna stared up at Colonel Lanche, a shiver rolling down her spine. Something wasn’t right—he was after something.

After Emily.

Of course he didn’t care about finding her… unless there was a reason that directly affected him.

Jenna searched wildly back through her memory, trying to recall anything, anything at all Emily might have mentioned.

Nothing came to mind other than the fact that Emily hated the soldiers and living on the Tracks. It was no surprise she’d run off.

But did she take something with her?

Did she know something?

Emily’s a big girl, Jenna reasoned. If she wants to come back to Grand Central, she will. So there’s no reason to assume she needs to be saved by these men.

Right?

And if that was the case, then maybe Jenna shouldn’t be helping them find her. But that was crazy—this was the US Army, or a faction of it, anyway.

Jenna had always trusted authority figures. Cops, she knew, were there to help.

And soldiers were heroes.

So why, now, did she feel like a criminal, scared of them?

Lanche stood threateningly over her, putting both large arms on either side of her chair, effectively trapping her where she sat.

“What,” he asked, “are you not telling me?”

“Nothing. I don’t—I don’t know anything,” she stuttered. “I swear.”

“Tell me where she might have gone.”

The hospital, Jenna thought immediately. Where Emily worked, where she spent most of her life before the Pulse. She might go back there. Or maybe even to her apartment in Midtown to gather some of her stuff.

Photos, that sort of thing. The stuff the army hadn’t let them take with them to the camp.

But Jenna kept her mouth shut, looking at Lanche, unable to hide her terror.

“I don’t know what game you’re playing,” he said softly, dangerously, “but you’re being insubordinate.”

Oh no, no no.

The Colonel’s favorite word. Jenna knew what it meant.

She would be disciplined.

But from the way he went over to the door and locked it, she knew it wouldn’t be a public lashing like usual. Like what he did to Emily. This would be private. This would be worse.

Her hands shook with terror as he walked away from her and picked up his old window-blind rod.

Fuck.

But she couldn’t tell him where Emily might be—he was insane. “I—I don’t know where she is, sir!” It was true, how could she really know?

“Strip.”

His words hit her like a slap in the face.

Jenna slowly removed her soiled top, hoping that would be enough. Her full breasts hung loose, since she had long ago lost her only bra. A small red hickey marred her left breast from her adventures the night before with the soldiers.

She never should have trusted them.

“Take off your pants, too. Don’t make me tell you twice.”

Tears rolling down her face, Jenna stripped off her pants. She felt a rush of heat flow to her core and she blushed, embarrassed by her body’s betrayal.

Because even though the Colonel was crazy, even though he wanted to really hurt her—his dominant behavior turned her on. Something must be wrong with her wiring, she thought desperately, and then she couldn’t think about anything except Lanche, staring down at her.

Lanche stepped toward her, holding the cane in front of him.

He slowly, carefully, traced the cane down her cheek, her neck, down her breast, the hard edge of the plastic running over her nipple, making it harden into a tight peak.

What was happening?

“You’re a beautiful little whore, Jenna,” Lanche whispered, dropping the cane down between her legs, rubbing the tip lightly over her mound, parting her nether lips. She shuddered but felt her pussy get wet as he continued tracing the cane down her naked body. “Now turn around.”

Trembling, Jenna turned, her back to Lanche. She felt the cane trace her spine, vertebra by vertebra, and then he laid it softly over her ass cheeks.

“Are you sure,” he asked, “that you have nothing to tell me?”

“No, sir,” she said. The cane whipped through the air and landed on her ass. She shrieked as the pain cut across her skin.

She clenched in anticipation of another blow, but instead Lanche slid his fingers between her legs.

“Why,” he murmured in her ear, “are you wet, slut?”

Jenna felt her whole body flush in humiliation. Why, why? Maybe for the same reason she got off on prostituting herself.

The cane sliced through the air again, and she gasped as it made contact with her ass.

“How can I discipline you properly,” Lanche asked, bringing the cane down again in a slightly different spot across her flesh, “if you like it?”

“I’m sorry, sir,” she said, squealing as the fire lit across her thighs this time.

“Tell me where she is. Take a good guess.”

She shook her head, her blonde hair falling over her face. The cane struck her again and she couldn’t hold back the cry that came out of her mouth.

“I can do this all night,” Lanche said calmly. “It’s no skin off my back. It is, unfortunately, going to mean skin off yours. Do you understand?” He caned her again and she squealed in surprise at the stinging blow.

“Yes, sir,” she gasped.

Suddenly his hand slipped between her legs again, running his fingers across her pussy. “Then why,” he asked with amusement in his voice, “are you so turned on?”

She hung her head in shame, unable to speak.

“Do you want to come, Jenna?” he asked quietly.

Turning her head over her shoulder, Jenna looked at him in shock. She nodded mutely.

Yes, yes she wanted to come.

Lanche picked up the rhythm of his fingers, sliding them back and forth over her clit, creating a riot of sensation through her body. She bucked her hips, trying to get more contact with his fingers.

It felt so good, even though her ass still stung from the caning. Or maybe, she admitted to herself, because of it.

She felt herself reach the edge of orgasm, but just as she was about to ride the crest of the climax over the top, Lanche stopped.

She wailed in frustration.

“Where might Emily be, Jenna?”

A sob escaped her throat. “I can’t tell you.”

He flicked her clit, just enough to keep her right on the edge, not enough to push her over. She groaned.

“I want to help her,” he said. “She’s in danger unless we find her and bring her back to the safety of the camp.”

He rubbed her clit ever so lightly, making her squirm against his fingers, desperate for more. Her breath grew ragged.

“I won’t hurt Emily, Jenna. Tell me where she is.”

Jenna could barely think straight, her mind addled by physical stimulation. Maybe, she thought desperately, maybe I’m the crazy one.

Maybe Emily is in danger and she needs help, and I’m not helping them find her.

A lifetime of trusting authority settled over her like a warm blanket, and Jenna drew in a deep breath.

“I’m not sure,” she whispered. “She used to work at Roosevelt, so she might go there, or maybe her apartment. I don’t know.”

“Good girl,” Lanche said softly, and he ground his palm against her clit with enough force that she came immediately, gasping for air as the orgasm racked through her body, her pussy clenching.

He walked away, leaving her naked in the middle of the room.

Oh God—what had she done?

Did she do the right thing… or had she just signed Emily’s death warrant?

7

Mason watched as Emily slowly packed her few belongings in her backpack.

“Can I help?” he asked, even though the last thing he wanted was for her to have a reason to leave even sooner.

She hugged the backpack against her chest and shook her head. “No. Thank you.”

Damn it. He never should have told her he was a convicted murderer.

She looked at him fearfully now, and he couldn’t blame her. This was all his fault. Now there was no way she would stay with him. But for her to leave, unprotected, wasn’t right. He couldn’t let her go.

“You should pack bleach,” Mason said. “To treat water.”

Emily nodded. “Okay. Thanks.”

“Damn it, Emily,” he said, unable to keep the frustration from his voice. “Don’t look at me like that.”

She looked away. “I’m sorry.”

“No, don’t be sorry,” he sighed. “I just hate you looking at me like I’m a threat to you. I’m not. I’d never hurt you.”

“Did you say that to her, too?” she asked, her eyes blazing with anger and fear.

“Her?” Confused, Mason searched her face. What is she talking about?

“Your victim,” she spat out.

Mason shook his head. “My victim, as you put it, was not a her. It was a him. And no, I never promised him I wouldn’t hurt him. In fact, if I remember correctly, I told him the second I saw him that he was dead meat.”

Emily gasped.

Fuck. He may as well tell her the whole story now. Even if it meant bringing up painful memories. “Do you want to know what happened?”

She nodded mutely, still hugging her backpack to her chest as if she were a child, clutching a teddy bear for comfort.

“I have a sister named Stephanie,” he said, sitting down on the edge of an uncomfortable plastic hospital chair. “She lives in LA.”

Emily didn’t speak, but she was still listening, which Mason took as an invitation to continue. “She got attacked. Raped, by a man who worked in her apartment building.”

He felt his pulse pick up as the memory came flooding back—how he had rushed into the emergency room, only to find his sister beaten, a half-dead look in her eyes.

He pushed the memory to the back of his mind so he could focus on speaking. “I tried to play by the rules. We pressed charges. Hired a lawyer. But the—the man who ruined Steph’s life got off on a technicality. A fucking technicality!”

His voice rose in anger and he had to count to ten before he could speak again. The seconds seemed long.

Emily didn’t speak, but she hadn’t run away, either.

“Then it became clear to me—my sister would spend the rest of her life traumatized and scared, and this asshole—this rapist—would get away scot-free. So… I knew I had to take matters into my own hands. Caught up with him after he got off work and beat the shit out of him. But I couldn’t stop—didn’t want to stop. I just… kept going, kept hitting him. All I could think about was what he’d done to my sister.”

Emily still hadn’t said a word, but he knew she listened. Tears filled her eyes. Were they tears of fear… was she scared of him?

“I’m not proud of what I did,” he said. “The cops got me the very next day, and I went without a fight. I deserved to go to prison for life for what I had done. And I’ll probably go to hell for it in the next life as well.”

Mason looked down at his hands, surprised to see they weren’t trembling.

“It wasn’t my place to decide who gets to live and who should die,” he said. “I understand that now. But I can’t say I’m sorry for what I did. Because with that evil man dead, Stephanie could finally breathe again, you know?”

Emily nodded. “Yeah.”

“Do you see what I mean now, that I’m not a danger to you? I’d never hurt you, Emily. And I can’t let you run off. Because that would be like letting you kill yourself.”

Emily dropped the backpack on the hospital bed and ran up to Mason, throwing her arms around his neck. “I’m glad you killed that rapist,” she said. “We need fewer of those in the world.”

Mason hugged her tightly, burying his face in her hair. “Thank you,” he said. Knowing she didn’t hate him for his crime made him feel like a weight lifted off his shoulders.

“But, Mason,” she whispered, “I can’t stay. No matter what you say to me, I can’t stay in New York. I know you don’t believe me, but it’s true. I’m not safe here.”

Mason nodded even though he wanted to hold her here, tie her down and make her stay safe with him. He couldn’t keep her if she didn’t want to be kept.

Emily picked up her backpack and hefted it onto her narrow shoulders, tightening the straps so the weight was distributed equally. She stood on her tiptoes and planted a kiss on his cheek.

A chaste kiss. A kiss that said good-bye.

“Good luck, Em,” he said, his throat tight. “It was really great meeting you.” He shook his head—that didn’t sound right. They had more than just met. “If you change your mind, I’ll be at my apartment.”

He pulled a worn pencil stub from his cargo pants and scribbled his address on a scrap of litter.

Emily took it from him with shaking hands and read it before putting it in her backpack. “Thank you.”

She turned and walked out of the room and down the corridor.

Mason stepped out into the dank hospital hallway and watched as she strode determinatedly toward the front exit of Roosevelt. With no way of communicating, no phones, no Internet, unless people were within walking distance of a visit they might as well be out of his life.

He’d never see her again. Just like he’d never see his sister Stephanie again.

Emily shouldered her bag and walked out the front door of Roosevelt Hospital, refusing to look back at Mason. If she did it would all be over. She wouldn’t be able to leave.

Why? Why did he have such a strong effect on her?

Knowing he wasn’t the cold-blooded murderer she originally thought he was made her feel safer around him.

Well, he is a killer, she amended. But at least he had honorable intentions. And after life on the Tracks, she could easily understand wanting to kill a rapist.

She might try it out herself someday, if she had to. And if the army came for her, all bets were off. She’d fight to survive.

She wouldn’t go quietly, no way in hell.

Outside, Emily glanced around.

Stalled cars littered the streets, many vehicles with their gas tanks open, the gasoline long since stolen and used for fuel for older cars and some rebuilt generators, or so Emily had heard.

She hadn’t seen anything generator-powered at the camp. They must be saving the generators for important stuff. But like what?

If there was radio, what else had Colonel Lanche hid from them?

Emily needed to listen to the radio. Her shocked mental state had prevented her from listening to, from even touching the radio before Mason found her. She had to see what was going on in the outside world. But she needed to find a place she could hide out in privacy.

Looking around, she realized she’d walked over from Tenth to Fifth Avenue, arriving at the Plaza. Tilting her head up, she took in the beautiful hotel. Here would work. Why not?

It’s not like she needed a reservation.

Emily stepped into the Plaza. The smell of stale urine floated in the air, and the once magnificent front lobby was in disarray. Some asshole had even sprayed graffiti across the main concierge desk.

Looking around for the stairs, she stepped carefully over the broken glass on the floor and opened the door to the stairwell. She climbed up to the second floor, pausing on the landing.

She had to go up higher.

At the fifth floor, Emily stopped and opened the heavy door out into the carpeted hallway. The very first room door she tried swung open. Of course. The electronic locks and key cards wouldn’t work after the Pulse.

She looked around the room in awe. It was beautiful—plush, luxurious, even though it had been obviously ransacked. The bedding was missing, and someone had smashed the table to shreds, most likely to use as firewood.

She shut the door behind her and bolted it. At least the physical bolt still worked. Setting the radio on the carpet, Emily sat cross-legged in front of it and held it reverently in her hands. She cranked the hand-crank, grateful it wasn’t battery operated.

The radio seemed to come to life in her hands and she nearly dropped it. It had been that long since she’d heard a voice come out of anything other than a person. The signal was very poor, and static-y. She raised the volume, pressing her ear to the radio’s speakers.

“This is American Victory Radio,” a man’s voice said. “Check in daily for news from around the country as we rebuild, better and stronger than ever.”

Yeah, right, Emily mused, but she listened anyway.

“President Powers has declined, amidst much controversy, help from United Nations officials to rebuild,” the voice on the radio continued. “American Victory Radio supports our new president’s decision, as America must not cede control to outside forces.”

The UN wants to help? Emily thought, listening in surprise. It made sense, she supposed. But once they came in and took over, they might never leave.

America would be done for.

“If you are in need of food, shelter, or medical care, there are state-sanctioned shelters in every state across the US,” the voice continued.

“If you wish to take federal food rations, any food you have on hand will be taken and added to the federal food bank.

“We at American Victory Radio do not advise, repeat do not advise, taking federal rations unless absolutely necessary for survival.

“And please, on that note, Americans, don’t loot from your neighbors. Don’t steal. Don’t let the terrorists who destroyed us with the Pulse destroy our integrity as well.

“We are still, after all, America.”

Wow, lots of patriotism, Emily thought. Just like after 9-11. Americans, New Yorkers, rallying together to fight against the terrorists.

She twisted the knob on the radio, hoping to find another station. Someone else in the whole of the country had to be on, right? Well, maybe they were, but she was too far to hear their station. White noise filled the room as she carefully searched the gamut of both AM and FM stations.

Emily turned off the radio and stared at it. Those other state-sanctioned shelters, what were they like? They might be—hell, probably were—as bad as Grand Central. But maybe, just maybe, they were okay. Better.

Maybe there was a farming community out there in the country somewhere she could be a part of, if she could only reach it. Someplace where she could eat chicken instead of rat. At the thought of chicken, her stomach rumbled. She was hungry already, but she couldn’t dig into her emergency supplies yet.

Something outside the door fell down with a clatter. Gasping, Emily’s head whipped around the room.

The door was locked, bolted. She should be safe. But what—or who—was out there?

Someone knocked sharply at the door. Emily shrieked, clasping her hand over her mouth in horror.

A man’s voice. “Open this door, by order of the United States Army and the New York State police under President Powers’s martial law.”

Oh God no. This couldn’t be happening. How, how did they find her so quickly? Did they hear the radio? Did they follow her since she left Roosevelt?

Her hands trembled as she slid the radio underneath the bed and stood up.

“If you don’t open this door,” the voice said, “I am authorized to break it down. You have one last chance.”

She froze, unable to move. No way in hell she’d open that door.

She wouldn’t go down without a fight.

“Back away from the door,” a voice barked, and she cringed. A terrible smashing sound filled her ears as the door fell in off its hinges.

A group of five soldiers stormed in and she screamed. One large man stepped up to her and quickly ran his hands over her body.

Oh God, they’re going to rape me. Then, nothing. Just a pat down.

“Clear,” the soldier said. Then he turned to her. “Where is it?”

Emily shook her head. “Where’s what?”

The soldier slapped her then, hard across the face. The sound of his hand hitting her skin rang out like a shot in the hotel room.

She held her cheek in shock. This wasn’t a soldier, couldn’t be.

A real soldier would never do these things. These men who called themselves the army were nothing more than opportunistic thugs wearing uniforms, probably taken off the corpse of a real soldier, she thought bitterly. Her cheek stung.

He grabbed her arm, yanking her forward, pushing her to the ground. She curled into a ball and covered her head with her arms, bracing herself for the blows.

They never came. The men were ransacking the room for the radio.

“Found it.” A soldier’s triumphant voice rang out.

Her heart raced. They would kill her now. Mason had been right—this was a suicide mission. She hadn’t even gotten out of fucking Midtown!

The thought of Mason steeled her resolve to fight. If she didn’t fight she’d never see him again.

The soldiers, radio in hand, stood over her on the floor. “She’d be cute if she weren’t so dirty,” one said, laughing.

“I don’t mind ’em dirty,” another said.

Emily bit back her terror and fisted her hands, ready to kick his ass, even if it was the last thing she ever did.

“Does Lanche need her for anything?” the man who slapped her asked the other soldiers.

“Let’s bring her back in case he does.” The man who had spoken looked at her and rubbed his crotch lasciviously. “You’re a whore, I can tell. You’ll make a nice addition to the Tracks.”

The other soldiers hooted and Emily spat in his face. She couldn’t go back, she’d rather die. “I’m not going,” she said, her voice hoarse from screaming. “Fuck you.”

“Oh I will,” he said, his voice deadly serious. He wiped her spit from his face with a dirty handkerchief. “You can count on it.”

He hoisted her up over his shoulder in a fireman’s carry. She clawed at the soldier’s back, screaming at the top of her lungs in rage and fear. His hand came down hard on her ass, making her yelp in surprise more than pain.

She stopped trying to claw at him. It was useless, she may as well conserve her energy for when she had a fighting chance at actually hurting him. She let herself go limp in his arms as he carried her back to hell. Grand Central Terminal. She didn’t know what would happen to her there, but it wasn’t going to be good.

They might execute her.

For treason.

8

Mason lit a fire in his fireplace, but nothing could warm the chill that settled in his bones.

Stop it, he ordered himself. You’re acting like a fucking idiot. She was just a girl.

A stubborn, headstrong girl who wouldn’t listen to a word he said. He knew, if he thought about it rationally, that he’d be better off without her.

But he couldn’t think rationally, not about Emily.

Fuck.

He did fine on his own—he could take care of himself. His first order of business would be finding a new gun so he could continue to take care of himself. Without a gun he was a sitting duck. It was just a matter of time before he’d be found, and he’d have no protection.

If they found him, the army, like the law, wouldn’t care that the man he killed deserved to die. No—the only thing they’d care about was getting a “dangerous convict” off the streets. In these post-Pulse times, there’s no way they’d take him on as another mouth to feed.

He’d be killed, and he didn’t blame them. But that didn’t mean he wouldn’t fight.

At least Emily has a gun, he thought. That should help keep her safe. At least, he assumed she had a gun. What else could she have stolen that would have caused such panic in her eyes?

There wasn’t too much of value to people anymore. Just guns, ammo, and food.

A year ago cigarettes had been a hot commodity, but after a while they were all smoked, every last one. With the nicotine out of everyone’s system, cigarettes were no longer a useful bartering tool.

But ammo—hell, ammo was like gold. Better than gold, even. Gold he could maybe barter for a little food or supplies… but with ammo, he could hunt for food or trade for supplies—he could even steal supplies as long as he had ammo backing him.

No one had been in Mason’s apartment while he’d been at the hospital. Part of him wished he’d never gone to the hospital in the first place.

Then he never would have met Emily. Then he wouldn’t have to spend the rest of his natural life wondering what happened to her, just like he wondered about his sister Stephanie.

He lay back in front of the fireplace and closed his eyes. Visions of Emily’s beautiful face filled his mind’s eye.

Thoughts of her naked body, hot and sweaty underneath him, rushed through him. He could almost smell her musk as he daydreamed, his cock stiffening in his pants.

It had been so wonderful to thrust into her wet heat, especially after not being with a woman in so long.

Mason pulled his cock out of his pants and stroked himself, but his cool, dry hand paled in comparison to the real thing… to Emily.

He imagined Emily straddling his face so he could eat her pussy, suck her clit until she screamed in ecstasy and then suck it some more. The thought of her face as she climaxed urged him on, and he thrust his hips forward, fisting his hand, wishing it was her.

Her name escaped his lips as he came, come splattering hotly across his abdomen. Fuck. He’d never see her again.

Mason opened his eyes, staring into the fire. Was she okay, right now?

He wondered how far she might have gotten on foot so far. Was she off the island? As much as he hated the thought of Emily not being nearby, he hoped so.

She’d been right when she said New York was a dangerous place to be now, especially for a woman like her, on her own. Mason wiped his abs clean with his handkerchief and sighed.

Kneeling to lace his boots, he shook his head. He stood up, looking around his apartment. His rats. He had to check on his second stash of rats, feed them, water them.

They were probably fine—if there was one thing rats were good at, it was surviving. And then he had to find a gun. That would be the hard part. At this point, pretty much his only hope of getting a gun would be if he found one on a dead man.

That, he realized, was actually a really sound idea. But where would he find a dead man whose gun wasn’t already stolen?

Snipers.

There had to have been some snipers during those first few insane weeks after the EMP hit. They’d position themselves on the roof or upper floor of a building, and if they got shot, their bodies might not have been discovered.

Especially after the Pulse, since no one was in radio communications. No one would even know for sure that a man was down.

He’d have to scour the rooftops of Manhattan and hope he lucked out. There had been so many men with guns those first few weeks. So much chaos.

At the time, everyone was thrilled to see the army rush in to save the day. But now—now it was a different story.

Mason needed to protect himself from them. Dousing his fire, Mason left his apartment, locking it carefully behind him.

He had a dead man to find.

“Put me down, asshole, or I’ll scream about that radio to this crowd until you shoot me,” Emily hissed in the soldier’s ear as he continued to carry her toward Grand Central.

He set her down roughly and jerked her forward by the arm. She walked slowly, her legs feeling weak. She needed time to get her wits together if she was going to get out of this mess.

“Walk faster or I’m carrying you again,” the soldier warned.

Emily cursed under her breath. She couldn’t believe she was back at Grand Central. The last place on earth she ever wanted to see again.

At the front entrance, an armed guard nodded at the group of soldiers in recognition. “Colonel Lanche said you’ve gotta bring the girl to him first thing.”

One of the soldiers turned to her and said, “Aren’t you a lucky little whore. I’ll have to visit you later, I guess.”

She shuddered involuntarily at his words and he laughed.

Emily wished she could go back in time and take Mason up on his offer to stay with him. Then she’d be safe—or safer, anyhow.

Now she was as good as dead.

The radio stayed hidden from view in her backpack from the other people at the camp. They carried it through the main terminal with Emily by their side.

Emily saw Jenna, her old roommate, her naturally blonde hair making her stand out amongst the other people. Without hair dye, there weren’t as many blondes around as there were before the Pulse. As much as Emily didn’t want to be at the camp, it was good to see Jenna’s face.

Jenna caught her eye and leapt up, running over to her, wrapping her in a hug. “Emily! You’re okay.”

Emily nodded. “They’re taking me to Lanche.”

Jenna paled. “I didn’t know where you were, I wasn’t sure if you were okay,” she whispered. “I’m—I’m so sorry, Emily.”

“They’re gonna kill me, I think,” she whispered back to Jenna. Jenna gasped.

“Not on my watch, honey,” she said with an uncertain smile. “Lanche likes me—I’ll talk to him, okay?”

Emily nodded again but she didn’t feel any better. She knew too much.

They had to kill her.

Would Lanche ask her questions first, or just shoot her right there?

The soldiers prodded her to keep walking, so she did. One foot in front of the other.

Colonel Lanche sat behind a makeshift desk in his private quarters, a room that used to be one of the shops in Grand Central, off the main terminal. He gestured them inside.

“Emily,” he said, standing to greet her. “We’re glad to have you back.”

It was a trick, she knew. She didn’t say anything.

“You are, of course, under arrest.”

Admit nothing.

“You stole our only way of communicating with the outside world,” he said, pausing again.

She waited for him to accuse her once more, but he held his ground, waiting for her to speak. Finally she couldn’t bear the silence any longer.

“How could you keep that radio a secret from everyone?” She meant to scream it but it came out as a harsh whisper, her throat already raw from yelling.

“We cannot share classified information with civilians,” he said, making civilians sound like a distasteful word. “You wouldn’t know how to utilize that information.”

“Why is having a radio classified? Why couldn’t you share the news every day with people? Let us listen to the American Victory Radio?”

Lanche laughed. “Well, that answers my next question. You listened to the radio, I see.”

Emily didn’t speak. She’d already said too much.

“The American Victory Radio is just one man, spouting lies from a basement somewhere outside the city. He doesn’t know anything. He has access to some radio equipment that was apparently saved in the Pulse, like our radio.”

One of the soldiers handed over the backpack to Lanche. He opened it and removed the radio reverently.

“Good work, men,” Lanche said. “You can go now.”

The soldier who had kept threatening her scowled at her. She understood the look in his eye, even if he couldn’t speak. Fear rushed through her.

He’d find her later.

If Colonel Lanche didn’t kill her first, of course.

Lanche continued searching through her backpack. “What’s this?” he asked, pulling out a scrap of paper.

Oh no… Mason’s address.

She tried to look nonchalant, hoping he wouldn’t recognize the significance of the address.

“Did you tell anyone about this radio, Emily?” Lanche asked, his voice velvet. She shook her head, trying to stifle the panic that crept up into her throat like bile.

“I think you did. I think you told someone.”

Emily shook her head again, dropping her eyes, not wanting him to look into them and read the truth.

“Andrews!” he barked, and a soldier—the very threatening soldier—immediately came back in the room. He must be stationed as a guard outside the Colonel’s room.

“Go to this address,” he said, handing the man the slip of paper. “If you see anyone there, kill them.”

“No!” Emily shrieked, horrified.

Lanche nodded at her outburst, as if she’d just proved his point.

Andrews glanced at her before looking back at Lanche. “What about the girl, do you want me to take care of her, too?”

“Perhaps. Report to me when you get back from your assignment.”

Andrews grinned at her malevolently and stepped back out of the room, holding the scrap of paper with Mason’s address on it.

She had to get out of there. Had to warn him.

But how?

“What shall I do with you?” Lanche murmured almost to himself. “I can’t trust you back in the general population of the camp. You know secrets you can’t be allowed to share.”

“I won’t tell a soul, I swear. Besides, who would believe me? Everyone knows all the radios got fried.”

Lanche smiled but shook his head.

“Just let me go,” she said. “You’ve got your radio back—let me leave. Please.”

“If I were to let you leave, what would you do for me?”

Emily swallowed. “Anything. I’ll do anything you want me to.” But could she really do whatever Lanche wanted? Yes, she realized. She’d do whatever it took to survive.

But Lanche was pure evil, and he disgusted her more than anything. Besides, she couldn’t trust him. Even if he said he would let her go after he had his way with her, that didn’t make it true.

He’d never let her leave.

Lanche smiled, looking satisfied with himself. “You always thought you were too good for us soldiers, didn’t you.”

“No—no sir.” Her voice sounded false even to herself.

“Well, I don’t want you, how about that. You’re filthy. You’re a traitor who doesn’t deserve to live. I’ll let Andrews take care of you when he returns.”

When he returns from killing Mason.

Emily swallowed around the lump in her throat. As much as she wanted to poke Lanche’s eye out, she had to keep her cool. If she could change his mind, perhaps play on his sympathy, then she’d be free. “Please, sir, don’t give me to Andrews. He’ll rape me before he kills me.”

“He can do what he likes with you. In the meantime, I can’t have you running around blabbing about things, now can I?” Lanche looked at her and smiled thinly. “You’re staying here. I’m going to dinner.”

And the mention of dinner, her stomach growled. She hadn’t eaten since breakfast. Stupid, she thought, to be thinking of food at a time like this.

“I won’t be wasting a ration on you, you’re already dead,” Lanche said, walking out the door and shutting it behind him. There was a faint but audible click as he locked it, even though there was, no doubt, an armed guard standing outside the room as well.

Her life was over.

Andrews would find Mason, and then Andrews would come back here, rape her, and kill her. A loud sob hitched in her throat at the certainty.

No, she couldn’t afford to fall apart now. She was a nurse, damn it, and trained to think critically through a crisis. There had to be a way out, even though it seemed hopeless. She’d survived this long, against all odds.

Pull yourself together. Think.

Mason looked out over the rooftop of the New York Public Library on Forty-Second Street and Fifth Avenue in disappointment. He was ready to call it quits for the night.

He’d been out searching for a new gun all day, had climbed to the roofs of dozens of buildings, but, so far, no downed shooters.

Then, something glinted in the corner in the moonlight.

Mason blinked, unsure if he could believe his eyes. In the dark, it was hard to see what was there, but something definitely gleamed amidst the cement and dirt.

Bounding over to the corner, Mason whooped in delight. A skeleton in army camo lay slumped in the corner.

The soldier had been dead for a long time, Mason presumed, to be just bone. Although the pigeons may have helped scavenge the meat from the bones.

Pigeons weren’t a problem anymore now that they’d been hunted to near extinction in New York City.

“Sorry you died, buddy. This wasn’t your fault,” he said to the soldier’s corpse.

Next to the body lay a rifle. Mason picked it up. Still loaded.

He patted down the worn pockets on the skeleton until he found the ammo pack. “Thank you,” he said to the corpse, pocketing the ammo.

I may have just saved my own life.

Mason hefted the rifle over his shoulder and aimed it at the street, looking through the optic sight. This thing was amazing, like looking through a telescope. He could see right to the ground, see the cracks in the sidewalk, even.

Mason looked back over at the corpse and noticed, for the first time, a huge backpack. The dead soldier must have been carrying as much as he could with him, since he wouldn’t have had a home base.

Maybe there were MREs in there. He wasn’t hungry now, but he wouldn’t turn down food if it was available. Mason sat down on the rooftop and hefted the large pack toward him. He emptied the contents on the cement.

A photo fell out, of a man and a woman on their wedding day. Damn.

He looked at the corpse and sighed. “That sucks, man. I’m sorry.” He wondered what happened to the soldier’s bride. Was she still alive, even? It wasn’t likely, Mason knew.

Hopefully there was a heaven, and they were in it together.

Mason shook his head and laughed to himself. He never got gushy like that before. He must’ve gotten softened a bit by Emily, because that was the only reason he could think of for his newfound Hallmark moment.

Emily—where was she, was she okay?

He brushed the thought aside so he could focus on the contents of the pack. She’s gone. He had to forget her, as hard as that would be to do.

Jackpot. Another gun, this one smaller. A pistol.

Mason checked it to see if it was loaded. It was. He clicked the safety on and slid it into the back of his pants and grinned. Perfect.

And look… a fresh shirt.

If he wore a soldier’s uniform and carried a soldier’s gun, he might be able to move more freely. Who’s to say he’s not part of the army—instead of a convict on the run?.

He stripped off the tight T-shirt Emily had given him and quickly buttoned the brown-and-khaki camo shirt. He’d keep his own pants—the dead soldier was a lot shorter than him, and the pants wouldn’t fit.

The shirt fit tightly, straining across his shoulders at the seams.

But the gun—ah, the gun was just right.

“Thanks, man,” Mason said. He took the photo of the soldier and his wife back out of the pack. He placed it on the dead man’s body, right over his heart.

Emily paced Lanche’s empty quarters at Grand Central Terminal.

Her stomach was in knots. She couldn’t eat now even if someone did offer her food, which they obviously weren’t going to do. How did criminals on death row ever manage to choke down their last meal?

Mason, she prayed, please don’t be home. Don’t let them find you and kill you.

If only she could warn him. Damn, how could she have been so careless as to leave his address in her backpack like that? She gritted her teeth.

Escape.

She had to focus on escape—it was the only chance she had of living through the night. Looking around the room with renewed vigor, she glanced up at the walls, hoping to find a window.

Of course, there were none—she was in an abandoned corridor of shops within Grand Central. The only glass was the display window, which had been painted over for privacy. She’d bleed to death if she tried to crash through that.

Hmm. There was most likely an armed guard at the door to Lanche’s room, but she’d never actually confirmed that fact.

Walking over to the door, she slowly grasped the doorknob and tried to turn it. Nothing. The door was locked. She knocked on the door, hoping someone outside—maybe even the guard—would hear her and help.

A man’s voice answered, “What.“

“Sir?” she called through the door. “I have to use the bathroom.”

“There’s a bucket in the back of the room behind the curtain. Use that.”

Shit. She’d actually already known that—she’d hoped the guard hadn’t.

“Please, let me out,” she said, her cheek pressed against the rough wooden door. “They’re going to kill me. You don’t want my death on your head, do you?”

The guard didn’t respond.

“Think about Nazi Germany,” she said, “how good people stood by and let bad people do horrible things. You don’t want to be like that.” She held her breath, hoping her impassioned speech had softened the guard toward helping her.

Still, no answer.

Then… the guard spoke. “You are a threat to national security. My assignment is to make sure you don’t leave this room, and that’s what I’m gonna do.”

A threat to national security? Oh please. Emily felt a bubble of semi-hysterical laughter come up in her throat.

She really would die tonight. So she had nothing to lose.

She looked around the room again, this time trying to think of anything, anything at all, even if she might get hurt in the process.

She was fearless now. A rush of power settled over her. It felt freeing, somehow, knowing she was going to die.

It made her feel invincible.

Could she bash the door down, tackle the guard—maybe hit him over the head, or poke his eyes out—and escape?

Only one way to find out.

9

Mason walked slowly along Fifty-Seventh Street, enjoying the feeling of his limbs stretching out.

He swung two dead rats by their tails. His secondary rat nest had been in surprisingly good shape considering how long he’d had to leave his rats to fend for themselves.

He’d make himself dinner at his apartment and clean his new guns. After a year of exposure to the elements, both weapons needed some TLC, that was for sure.

Two men were talking as Mason rounded the corner to Trump Tower. Freezing, Mason flattened himself against the building and listened.

“Fucking squatters,” one man said. “Found himself a pad in Trump Tower. Bet he was on welfare before the Pulse.”

“Opportunistic fucks, am I right?” the other man said. Then—”All right, Andrews, how we gonna do this?”

“We go up, find the bitch’s leak, and kill ’em. Then I’ve got a date with Emily.”

It took every bit of self-control Mason had to not open fire on them right then and there.

And the only reason he didn’t was because he didn’t know how many more of them there were. Two against one was bad enough, especially since he hadn’t gotten a chance to test his new weapons yet.

What if he took aim and missed? What if the gun misfired, or the sight was off? It was too risky.

They must have Emily.

Fear washed over him like ice water. Damn that stubborn woman—he never should have let her leave.

Andrews said he was going to kill him. And if they had gotten here, they must have either found his address in Emily’s bag, or tortured it out of her. He prayed to God it was the first and not the latter. The thought of Emily being in danger, being hurt—he could barely breathe.

He had to help her.

Mason stayed where he was until he heard the men go into the building. They wouldn’t find him there ever again. He’d have to leave everything and start over.

All his possessions, what few things he’d been able to acquire, were gone now. It was like when he first escaped from Rikers—alone, with only the clothes on his back and a gun.

But this time, instead of spending all of his time and energy avoiding the law, he’d have to go right into the heart of the army. He had to rescue Emily—so he’d go to the military camp.

Grand Central, he thought, watch out.

Emily stared at the door, her only way out of Lanche’s room. Okay, she could do this. Just like when she used to watch television and the cops would ram their shoulders against a door, breaking it open.

The soldier outside wouldn’t be expecting that—she could catch him off guard.

She went to the far side of the room so she could get a running start. Man, if only she had big broad shoulders like Mason. Her puny bony ones were probably going to shatter before the door would. But that didn’t matter—not if she was going to die anyway.

She may as well go out with a bang.

On the count of three, she thought.

One. Two. Three.

Emily stormed the door, twisting at the last moment and throwing her shoulder against the rough wood, slamming into it so hard she literally saw stars in her vision for a brief moment.

The soldier outside yelled “What the hell?”

But the door, she realized dismally, was still fully intact. She hadn’t even dented it.

A loud booming noise startled her as the guard behind the door rapped his fist against the wood sharply. “Whatever you’re doing in there, stop it.”

Damn it. That was it. That was all she had, and it hadn’t done a thing. The door was too hard. But what about the display window? She’d dismissed it earlier as a way to certain death, but she’d run out of options. It was painted glass, so obscured she almost forgot it was there. Glass she could break out of.

This… this could work.

She would have to be careful. There were so many places on her body she’d need to avoid accidentally cutting if she didn’t want to bleed to death—like the carotid artery on her neck, for instance.

Touching her neck self-consciously, Emily quickly surveyed her body. Radial arteries of the wrists, she’d have to protect those. Femoral arteries in her groin, those should be easier to protect, depending on how she went through the window.

But there was a very real risk she’d cut herself terribly from all the glass.

The image of herself somersaulting through the glass and landing at the feet of the guard, holding her hands out to him, unable to breathe as she choked to death on her own blood, stopped her cold.

What if she broke a hole in the glass first by throwing an object other than herself through it?

That might be smarter. It would, unfortunately, alert the guard that something was up, and when she the stepped through the hole in the glass she would most likely find herself staring down the barrel of his rifle.

But maybe she could bring a weapon—something heavy—and bash his head in.

The thought of injuring someone else, when she had spent her whole nursing career trying to save people’s lives, bothered her. But if she had to choose between that soldier—a man who probably helped himself to the girls on the Tracks every night—and herself, she’d choose herself without a second thought.

She needed to find something to throw.

The metal chair.

She could throw that through the glass, and then step through, pick up the chair, and smash the guard over the head.

Okay.

Emily picked up the chair, feeling its heft, and gave a practice swing. The chair was heavy and she felt her shoulder protest. She needed to just go for it.

The idea of swinging the chair through the window was much less scary than throwing herself against the door, so she didn’t need a countdown. Emily swung the chair with all her strength, whooping with joy when the painted glass window cracked, then shattered.

Shards of glass rained to the floor.

The guard outside yelled in surprise, and Emily went to step through the hole she’d made in the window. She had to be more careful than she’d originally anticipated because glass covered the floor, with huge stalagmite-looking glass shards poking up from the bottom of the window.

Her hesitation ruined everything.

The guard opened the door, stepped in, and pushed her onto the ground with a shove so hard it took her breath away. At least he hadn’t punched her in the face.

Maybe chivalry wasn’t dead after all.

“What the fuck did you do?” he screamed.

Emily didn’t answer. Her blood pounded in her ears so loudly she thought she might faint from fear.

He had handcuffs, large metal ones that looked scary and uncomfortable. He didn’t bother threatening her or reading Miranda rights or anything like that—there were no Miranda rights under martial law—he just picked her up by the wrists and slapped the cuffs on her.

He didn’t take the time to turn her around, so her hands were cuffed in front. Not that she was going to complain. If he intended to keep her cuffed, she’d be much better off with her hands in the front. Especially since her shoulder throbbed already.

With Emily secured, the guard stepped outside and brought back in the metal chair, shaking his head. “Colonel Lanche is going to be so pissed off.”

“Sorry,” Emily said, finally finding her voice. “But I had to. They’re going to kill me. Please, please let me go.”

“I’m going to be in deep shit for this,” the guard said, pointing at the shattered window. “If I let you go, I don’t even want to know what they’d do.” He looked around the room. “I can’t risk you doing anything like this again.”

Setting the metal chair down in the back of the room, he gestured for her to sit.

She almost protested that the chair was still covered in glass shards, but the look of pure anger and fear in the guard’s eyes made her bite her tongue. Sitting cautiously, Emily tried to look as innocent as possible, which wasn’t easy considering the damage she’d done.

The guard surveyed the room before leaning down, grabbing her wrists, and unlocking the cuffs.

“Thank you,” she said, but then she realized what he was doing. Shoving her back down on the seat, he cuffed her right ankle to the base of the chair. There was no way she’d be able to get free from the chair without a handcuff key.

“Stay put.” The guard scowled and grabbed a large metal filing cabinet. Lugging it in front of the broken window, blocking out the view of the corridor, he surveyed his work. Then he stepped back out the door.

Emily heard a lock click. Fuck.

She looked down at her ankle. It was handcuffed to a piece of metal attached perpendicularly on both sides, making a capital “I” shape where the chair legs joined.

If she could figure out a way to dismantle the chair, she might be able to get free. She shifted in the chair, trying to get a better view of her situation, and a huge piece of glass pierced her lower thigh.

She shrieked. The guard, assuming he heard her, ignored her.

She looked at her thigh cautiously. It wasn’t too bad—it hurt worse than it looked. The glass had nicked her, and a little rivulet of blood stained her already dirty jeans. The shard of glass still lay on the seat of the chair.

She lifted her hand to toss the glass away, where it couldn’t cut her anymore—but then she realized something. This glass that cut her could cut other people too. People like Andrews, when he came back from Mason’s apartment.

The thought of Andrews killing Mason steeled her against any possible reservations she may have had. Fuck it—there was no reason for her to worry about hurting Andrews. He was going to rape and kill her—that she knew.

But not if she killed him first.

Mason took a deep breath and shouldered his rifle. His best bet was to enter the Forty-Second Street entrance to the Grand Central Terminal FEMA camp in plain sight, preferably with a group of other soldiers.

But the other soldiers would surely recognize he wasn’t one of them—wouldn’t they? Several groups of soldiers were out, some patrolling, some appearing to be scavenging, and some hanging out, shooting the shit.

How could he convince several of those men to walk with him into the camp, without arousing suspicion?

Mason needed to find something heavy, something useful. Then he could ask for help carrying it inside. No one would stop them, hopefully. He looked around. Everything that may have been of value had long been taken already.

Emily was in there—possibly hurt or being tortured as he sat there like an asshole trying to figure out how to get to her. He had to act now. There was no time to fuck around.

Meandering up to the entrance as if he entered the camp ten times a day, Mason nodded to the guard at the door. The guard took a casual glance at Mason’s camo shirt and huge rifle, and nodded back, stepping out of his way.

It was almost too easy.

Once inside, Mason looked around, overwhelmed by the number of people he saw.

He was used to the streets being empty. In Grand Central, though, thousands of survivors were milling about, dirty, unwashed, and sickly thin.

It looked like the pictures he had seen of concentration camps. This is America—it shouldn’t be like this, he thought angrily.

But it was.

He scanned the main terminal. Even if Emily was nearby, the chances of him finding her in this sea of bodies were practically nil. But if she had been captured, she might be disciplined for stealing whatever she had stolen and maybe even for running away.

Remembering the red cane marks on her back, Mason seethed with anger. If those soldiers touched so much as a hair on her head, he’d lose his mind. But of course they would. And the sick fucks who did it before probably looked forward to doing it again.

Mason had promised her she’d never have to go back to Grand Central. The fact that she was here made him so upset he almost couldn’t think straight.

Where would they keep her?

He went up to a young woman with beautiful auburn hair and tapped her shoulder. “Excuse me, miss, can you tell me who’s in charge here?”

She laughed in apparent disbelief. “Are you joking?”

Shit. Now she’d realize he wasn’t really a soldier. What if she ratted him out? He kept his expression stern. “This is no laughing matter. I’ve been watching your behavior, and I don’t think you know who’s in charge.”

The woman shrank back from him and Mason felt his gut clench, but he had to do what he had to do. She touched her necklace self-consciously, as if to gather courage, her fingers grazing her slender, pale neck.

“What’s your name?” he asked.

“Clarissa.” She paused, as if reassessing her situation. “I’m sorry, sir,” she said, her entire demeanor changing. “You’re in charge, I know. Just—I wanted to stretch my legs for a bit before going back—”

Mason struggled to keep the horror he felt from showing. The rumors were true—the women here were being used as the camp’s own harem. But Clarissa still hadn’t told him what he needed to know. “No, no, that’s not what I meant. Who makes the rules? What’s his name.”

“Colonel Lanche, sir,” she said. “Do I have to go with you now?” she asked softly, sweetly, but Mason could feel the undercurrent of fear in Clarissa’s voice. It made him want to save her too. To save them all.

“No,” he said, turning away. He had to find Colonel Lanche. Looking back at Clarissa, who watched him with trepidation, he said, “I need to speak to the Colonel. Where can I find him?”

“You know,” she said, gesturing halfheartedly in the general direction of the shops. “His room. Or the OCC. If not there, the dining court. Or at night, the Tracks.”

Clarissa blushed as though she had personal knowledge of his visits to the Tracks. She probably did. Mason imagined her beautiful red hair made her stand out amongst the other women, making her more of a target for scum like Lanche.

“Thanks,” Mason said. He walked off, following Clarissa’s gesture. He’d find Lanche if it was the last thing he did.

Because it might very well be.

10

EMILY heard a man outside Lanche’s door say something to the guard. Something like, You can go now.

Oh God—he was back. Andrews was back.

The smell of her own fear rose off her body. Her breath came fast and shallow and the room started to spin.

“Wake up, bitch,” a sharp voice said. She looked up. Andrews stared down at her with a horrifying gleam in his eye.

“Is—” Please God, don’t let Mason be dead. “What did you do?” she asked.

Andrews shrugged. If he’d killed Mason, he’d definitely be bragging about it, even if just to upset her. Mason was still alive, she could feel it.

Andrews ran his large, calloused hands over her throat and she couldn’t breathe—not because he exerted any pressure on her neck, but out of fear so strong her throat constricted.

“I won’t waste a bullet on you, you know,” he said. “I’m going to strangle you instead.”

“You don’t want to kill me yet,” she whispered. “I could show you a really good time.”

She waited for a twinge of guilt to wash over her for trying to seduce her killer, but none came. She’d do what she had to do to save her life, and that was that.

Standing, she stumbled as her handcuffed leg caught on the chair. The cool glass shard that cut her before still gripped in her hand, hidden from Andrews’s sight.

Andrews laughed and shook his head as he unlocked her handcuffs. “Bob said you gave him a hard time. Did he fuck you too?”

Suddenly self-conscious, she stood before him, thrusting her breasts out, hoping to entice him into wanting to keep her around. Anything so he wouldn’t end the evening by killing her.

He looked her up and down critically. “You smell disgusting.”

“I can bathe,” she said. “Right now. You can watch if you want.”

“I don’t need your permission.” Andrews unzipped his pants. “You’re too dirty to fuck, slut,” he said. “But if you suck me off good, I’ll make your death painless. If you try to bite me or some shit like that, I’ll kill you my favorite way—slowly.”

Her stomach clenched painfully at his words. Emily nodded, and slowly dropped to her knees in front of Andrews. She had to buy time.

His pulled his pants down, his erect cock protruding obscenely. The glass shard in her hand felt warm, almost as if the cold glass had come to life. Almost as if that glass were as angry as she was.

She’d only have one chance. If she fucked this up, she’d die the way Andrews promised her—painfully and slowly.

But if she did it right she might be able to escape.

An image of the femoral artery, which ran between the groin and the crease of the leg, flashed through her mind like it did when she was in nursing school about to take a test.

Femoral artery was the answer here.

Emily opened her mouth and sucked the head of Andrews’s cock past her lips, gagging as he immediately thrust forward, bruising the back of her throat with his length. Bile rose in her throat and she swallowed, making him groan.

“That’s good, swallow me, bitch,” he said, tangling his hands in her hair, forcing her head in place.

As swiftly and fearlessly as she’d thrown that chair through the glass window, she swung her hand upward and sliced, hard and long and deep.

“What the—” Andrews dropped his hands from her hair and slapped her hard across the face when he saw the blood dripping down his leg at an alarmingly fast rate. “What did you do to me?”

His penis wilted and fell limply out of her mouth. He touched his groin and looked at his hand, his fingers covered in blood. Red—warm red blood rushed everywhere.

Emily jumped up. “Put pressure on it,” she told him, “if you want to live more than sixty seconds.”

Andrews looked at her blankly, already altered from the blood loss.

Gasping, he grabbed her arm, but his grasp was slippery with blood and she easily slid away.

Get to the door.

Andrews fell to the floor, not even trying to staunch the spurting blood flow at this point. He closed his eyes. He’d be dead soon.

She wasn’t sorry.

Still, she couldn’t look at him, even though it had been self-defense and she had nothing to be sorry for. She had to leave or everything she’d done would be in vain, and they would still kill her.

Rushing to the door, she turned the knob. Oh no no no. It was locked.

She looked back over at Andrews desperately. He had to have a key on him somewhere under all that blood.

A loud knock pounded on the door. Emily shrieked in surprise, her hand flying to her lips to muffle the sound. If someone came in now and saw her with a soldier lying in a pool of blood she’d be dead. Deader than she already was.

“Emily, are you in there?” a voice shouted through the door. Mason’s voice. But… how?

“The door is locked,” she cried.

“Stand back.”

She stepped far back, almost tripping over Andrews, slipping a little in his blood.

The door crashed open.

Mason had rammed into it with his shoulder like she tried to do earlier. Only this time, it worked. She’d never been so happy to see a person in her life. She ran up to him, wanting him to wrap her in his arms, but he stared at the scene behind her. Turning slowly, Emily saw the room through new eyes.

Broken glass lay everywhere. And Andrews lay in a large pool of his own blood. His lips blue, his eyes open and staring glassily at the ceiling, unblinking. She didn’t have to check his pulse to know he was dead.

She was a murderer now too.

Mason walked over to the body and Emily tried to pull him back. “No,” she said. “He’s dead.”

“I know that.” Mason reached down and picked up the soldier’s gun, wiping the blood off it on a dirty sheet before handing it to Emily. “Be careful. It’s loaded.”

Emily took it from him as if it were a snake. “Where’s the safety on this thing?”

He pointed to the little switch and said, “Keep your finger outside the trigger guard unless you’re ready to shoot. Don’t aim it at anything you don’t want dead.”

Emily nodded and stuck the gun in the back of her jeans, pulling her shirt over it to cover the butt of the gun. She felt safer, knowing she had some protection.

But no amount of firepower could help her if they didn’t get the hell out of there immediately.

Mason looked at her. “Are you okay?”

She thought about it for a second. No, she really wasn’t… She’d killed a man. “Let’s get out of here.”

“We’re not too far from the main exit. Follow me out—hopefully they’ll let you since I’m dressed like one of them.”

That was his plan? Just waltz out of there in plain sight? He must have sensed her skepticism. “I’m open to other ideas,” he said.

“No, no other ideas.”

“Let’s go, before they realize something’s going on. If we go now we’ll only have the one guard at the exit to deal with. I hope.”

“I can’t believe I killed him,” she whispered, following close behind Mason as they stepped out the ruined door, looking up and down the empty hall before walking toward the exit.

“Forget about it,” Mason said. “Besides, if you hadn’t done it, I would have. His number was up.”

The guard at the door stopped them. Emily realized her hands trembled, and she shoved them into her pockets to hide them.

“Be back before curfew or you’ll be locked out all night,” the guard said. “Ten P.M. and we go on lockdown.”

Mason nodded. “I know.”

Scrambling behind him, Emily didn’t dare look back. Freedom—finally, blessed freedom. She wanted to kiss the dirty New York City sidewalk. If she never went back to Grand Central again in her life, it would be too soon.

“We can’t go back to my apartment,” Mason said.

“I’m sorry about that,” she said, walking faster to keep up with his long strides.

He didn’t stop walking until they were several blocks from the camp. The fast pace had left her panting, unused to the exercise.

“Did he hurt you, Emily? Did any of them hurt you?”

“Well, let’s see,” she said. “I’ve been slapped, shoved, and cuffed to a chair, but somehow I don’t think that’s what you’re getting at. Oh, and I cut my thigh on some broken glass.”

He kept looking at her, a strange expression on his face.

“Why?” she demanded. “Maybe that’s why you haven’t touched me since you came and got me—you can smell him on me, and I disgust you.”

On a purely rational, intellectual level, Emily was aware she probably projected her own feelings onto Mason—but there was nothing rational about her emotions.

God, I practically threw myself at Andrews. Begged him to fuck me. No one needed to know about that. Ever.

Mason shook his head angrily. “You don’t disgust me, don’t be ridiculous. I just have to know. Were you raped?”

The image of Andrews forcing his cock into her mouth flashed through her mind unbidden. But she didn’t need to burden Mason with that visual too, especially after what happened with his sister. She didn’t want him acting all weird around her.

“No,” she said. “No one touched me.”

“That’s good.” He looked visibly relieved. “Then why’d you cut him… there?” He pointed to his groin.

“Because I’m a nurse.”

He nodded. “Okay.”

“Where do we go now?”

“We should find a place to hide for the night. Someplace they won’t think to look.”

Emily thought hard. Pretty much any building she’d ever been to before should be avoided. Ditto any hospital, since they had to know by now she was a nurse.

“I need to bathe, Mason,” she said softly. “I feel… dirty. I have to wash off the blood.” Looking closely at her skin, she could see speckles of dried blood all over. It was horrible.

“Okay,” Mason said. “We’ll find you a bath.”

Emily looked up at Le Parker Meridien Hotel on West Fifty-Sixth Street. “I heard they have a pool. Maybe I can bathe in that.”

“Only one way to find out.” Mason put his arm out to her like a gentleman in an old-fashioned movie, and Emily laughed, feeling silly as she took it.

The lobby had been vandalized and scavenged like every other building in the area. The words “The Meek Shall Inherit” were scrawled across one wall in spray paint. A philosophical graffiti artist, she mused.

They stepped over broken glass to get to the door that led to the back stairs.

The stairwells were dark as they ascended to the upper levels. Only the sounds of their footsteps and their breath broke the silence.

Mason swung open the door to the pool. Moonlight shone in through the large glass windows on the far side of the pool area.

The walls, Emily could see, were a dark wood paneling that looked sort of retro-modern. White chaise lounges spread out all over the place as if at any moment the hotel would be open again for business, and tourists with money to burn would be lounging by the poolside.

The pool, after a year of neglect, smelled disgusting. Thick algae created a scummy layer over the once chlorinated pool water.

“So much for my bath,” Emily said with dismay.

“I said you were going to get your bath, and I don’t make promises I can’t keep,” Mason said. “I need a bucket.”

“The rooms probably have ice buckets,” she suggested.

“Let’s find a room.”

Mason opened a room door down the hall. It wouldn’t be the easiest to get to from the pool area, but it wouldn’t be the first room someone would look in either, in case anyone did come looking.

They hadn’t left a trail, and no one had followed them—Mason had made sure of that. They should be safe for the night at the hotel.

The rooms on the upper levels hadn’t been trashed, probably because the looters were in a rush and unwilling to climb that many flights of stairs. He opened the bathroom door and grinned when he saw the bathtub and big fluffy bathrobes. “Don’t put that on yet—you’re going to want to wait until you’re completely clean.”

“I don’t think I’ve been completely clean since before the Pulse,” Emily laughed.

“Look—little mini shampoo bottles. Soap.”

“But no water.”

Mason grinned. “This is gonna involve some heavy lifting. Why don’t you gather some towels, and I’ll get some buckets of pool water.”

Emily shook her head. “What, I can’t do heavy lifting? I’ll help you carry water. It’ll be quicker that way.”

She must really want to get clean, Mason thought. He didn’t believe her when she said no one touched her. She acted like Stephanie had, after… Mason shook his head. No use thinking about that now.

They gathered two ice buckets of water each and carried them back to the room, sloshing scummy water over the sides of the buckets onto the expensive carpet. Just as Emily was about to pour the water into the bath, Mason stopped her.

“Wait,” he said. “I’ll hold a towel, you pour the water through the towel. It will filter it.”

Emily smiled. “That’s smart.” Pouring the green water over the white towel Mason held taut over the tub, she laughed excitedly as the water that went into the tub came through basically clear.

“It’s not drinkable, so don’t get it in your mouth,” Mason warned.

“Let’s get more,” Emily said. “We can have a full bathtub!”

Four trips to the pool and back, and Emily had her full bath. The water was room temperature, even slightly chilly, but she didn’t seem to care. Stripping out of her filthy clothes, she sank into the tub.

“Pass me one of those bad boys, will you?” she asked, gesturing to the mini shampoo bottles.

Instead, Mason poured some shampoo into his own hands and lathered up her hair. Blood rinsed out of the hair into the water.

“Are you hurt?” he asked, concerned.

“Not my blood,” she murmured, her eyes closed as he continued massaging her scalp, working the flowery-scented shampoo through her brunette strands.

“You did what you had to do,” he said.

She didn’t respond.

Mason ran his sudsy hands over her shoulders, down her arms, gently massaging her muscles as he washed away the grit and grime and blood.

He wished he could wash away her bad feelings as easily.

“Soap, please,” she said, sticking her hand out. He unwrapped a very thin bar of citrus-smelling bath soap and handed it to her.

She rubbed the bar in circles over her pubic hair, then dipped her fingers between her legs, washing herself carefully—though Mason couldn’t see exactly what she was doing since she lay on her back.

Watching her touch herself—even though all she did was wash—made his cock twitch in his pants. He wanted to be clean too. “No rush, take your time. But I wanna bathe when you’re done. I’ll use the same bathwater.”

Emily nodded slowly, her eyes still closed. She looked so much paler now, with all the dirt and soot washed off her face and limbs.

“I’m done.” She stood, grabbing a towel and wrapping it around her torso. “Your turn.”

Mason stripped off the dead soldier’s shirt and his own dirty pants, carefully laying his guns on the long white bathroom counter next to where Emily’s gun had been.

“Hey,” he said. “Where’s your gun?”

Already dressed in the fluffy white robe, she patted her pocket, shrugging. “I like having it on me.”

As long as she didn’t accidentally shoot him, he had no problem with that.

Mason squeezed the contents of another shampoo bottle into his hands and made quick work of lathering himself up, making sure to clean his cock and ass as carefully as Emily had cleaned herself.

Stepping out of the tub, he gratefully took the robe Emily handed him.

“Wow,” she said. “You’re not as tan as I thought you were.”

“I guess a lot of that was dirt.”

Emily smiled and looked down at the bathwater, now a dingy gray. “I’m going to wash our clothes,” she announced. “They can dry overnight.”

“All right,” he agreed. “But I’m getting fresh water.”

“Do you still have to wear that soldier’s outfit?”

Those fucking bastards. If she hadn’t already killed that one he’d have done it himself. And if he ever saw another again, he’d kill him too.

“Not tonight, Em. But I should wear it when we hit the road. It’s like a disguise.”

She nodded, but she touched the garment cautiously, as if it might bite her.

“It’s just a shirt. There are no soldiers here,” Mason said. “And if a soldier does come here, I’ll shoot him.”

“I killed a man, Mason. What was I thinking? I’m going to hell now because I killed a man. There was so much blood…”

Mason wrapped his arms around her. She smelled delicious, but he tamped down his desire so he could comfort her. “You’re not going to hell. You did what you had to do. And I’m—I’m proud of you. You took care of yourself.”

She looked up into his eyes. “I suppose I did. I didn’t think anyone was going to rescue me. I had to save myself.”

“It’s good to be independent. Never depend on anyone. You gotta look out for yourself, and that’s what you did.”

“That’s what you do,” Emily said softly, “huh.”

“I work best alone. It’s how I’ve always been, and how I’ll probably always be.”

11

Later, as Emily hung the freshly washed and wrung-out clothes on the shower bar in the hotel bathroom, she reflected on Mason’s words. He was proud of her for killing her attacker, because she had to look out for herself—because he wouldn’t always be there to save her.

She would be alone, and he would be alone—somewhere else.

Why did that wrench her gut so much?

How would she escape the city without his help? No—he had no place in the city to stay for anymore. His home had been compromised. So he could go with her.

But he didn’t know where they’d escape to, or what it would be like. At least they both knew the city well, harsh as it was.

What might be out there, outside the island of Manhattan?

Tomorrow, Emily promised herself, she’d find out. She’d walk all day if she had to—she was going to cross the bridge off the island and start heading north. Crops could very well be rotting in a field somewhere—perfectly good food—simply for lack of people to harvest and then no trucks to ship stuff.

She imagined walking through a cornfield, the stalks growing higher than her head. The thought calmed her somehow. It felt meditative.

Yes, tomorrow she would get off the island and head upstate. She’d start her new life.

Tonight, she’d do everything in her power to convince Mason to join her.

Her powers of persuasion might be a bit rusty, but she was going to enjoy trying, anyhow, if he was up for it.

Emily opened the bathroom door. Mason lay naked in the middle of the large king-sized bed on top of his robe, the duvet tossed onto the floor. His hands were laced behind his head, and he appeared to be dozing, or thinking. His eyes opened at the sound of her coming out of the bathroom and he stood up quickly.

“I know you had a hard time, being back at Grand Central,” he said, stepping toward her. “So I want you to know, you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. I’ll understand.”

Emily dropped her robe to the floor, the gun making a muffled thud in the pocket as it hit the ground. “I can take care of myself, remember?”

He looked at her naked body with an unbridled lust in his eyes. “I know. Tonight, though—let me take care of you.”

He strode toward her, dropping his robe on the floor as well. His huge muscular chest filled her field of vision as he stepped in close to her, towering over her, smoothing her damp, almost dry hair.

The smell of flowers filled the air as he caressed her cheek, moving her hair off her shoulder.

It feels so good to be clean again.

She rose up on her tiptoes and kissed his lips, opening her mouth against his until he claimed her, pressing his tongue into her mouth, tasting her and letting her taste him.

Dropping his mouth to her neck, he left a trail of nibbling kisses all the way down to her breast before capturing her nipple in his lips, sucking the tight bud.

“You smell incredible,” he breathed. “I’d forgotten how good a woman can smell, and taste.” His tongue darted out past his lips and he licked her slowly, rolling his tongue around her areola.

Reaching around to her other breast, he gently pinched the tight peak in rhythm to the flicks of his mouth on her other nipple, creating a riot of sensation in her breasts. Emily moaned in pleasure, running her hands over his shaggy, still-damp hair. The stubble on his face scratched the delicate skin on her breasts, but she didn’t care.

As he played with her nipples, she slid her hands down his chest, running her hands over his pecs until she found the tight, flat little pebbles that were his nipples. She pinched one experimentally and he gasped.

“Is that okay?” she asked, pinching again.

“Yes,” he said. “That’s definitely okay.”

Licking down his chest, she swirled her tongue around his flat nipple, sucking it into her mouth the way he did with hers. His skin tasted fresh and clean and totally new to her.

Groaning, he lifted her head and kissed her deeply on the mouth, devouring her. She could easily get lost in a kiss like this. All of the horror of the past year melted away. If only he could kiss her forever, she wouldn’t care the world was upside down.

Wouldn’t care that she’d murdered a man. That she was alone with a convicted murderer, when only days ago she had been terrified of him.

Funny how things could change so dramatically, so quickly.

“You’re beautiful, Emily,” he whispered, pulling back and looking at her as if he had never seen her before. She felt her whole body flush and she laughed, averting her eyes from his intense stare.

“Thank you. And thank you for the bath. I feel like I washed off months of grime.”

“My pleasure.”

She wanted to make him happy—wanted to show him how much she appreciated his protection and help. And he looked amazing, so newly scrubbed. Dropping to her knees, she licked her lips, preparing to take his cock in her mouth.

He hardened in anticipation, but suddenly her pulse raced. Her breath came too fast. The world tilted, she felt dizzy.

(if you suck my cock good)

Oh God—she couldn’t do it. She couldn’t suck Mason’s cock—not after what had happened with Andrews. Somehow it felt wrong.

As if Mason could sense something wasn’t right, he pulled her up to standing, hugging her close to him. The feel of his slow, steady heartbeat soothed her, and her breathing returned to normal.

“I’m sorry,” she said. “I just—this afternoon, before I…” Her voice trailed off and she couldn’t continue.

“It’s okay,” he said soothingly. “You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to. I understand.”

The room had stopped tilting. Her panic attack subsided completely. “Thank you.”

“We can just rest, if you want,” he said. “Cuddle up.”

She shook her head. “I don’t want to just cuddle, Mason. I still… I still need you.” Emily kissed him. “Please… make me feel good.”

Wrapping his arms under her thighs, he lifted her, cradling her body against his chest. “You smell amazing. I have to see what you taste like now.”

Laughing, she wrapped her arms around his neck. “Cleaner, I would imagine.”

“You tasted pretty good to me before too. Just so you know.” He dropped her back on the large bed, running his large hands down her breasts, over her belly, and finally to her thighs.

Her pussy clenched in anticipation, but he took his time, kneading her thigh muscles, lightly touching the little hairs covering her legs. He stood by the side of the bed, his muscular body filling her field of vision.

Drawing his fingers down her calves, he held her foot in both hands, gently massaging the sole of her foot, even rubbing between her toes.

“That feels amazing,” she said.

“You have such cute little toes,” he said, planting a little kiss on the top of her pinky toe. “I’m going to do this now, while you’re all clean and fresh.”

Emily lifted her head. “Do what?”

In answer, Mason sucked her toes into his mouth, the wet heat of his mouth on her toes sending pleasurable shock waves through her body. A little nibble and she moaned, as if a cord connected her toes to her pussy, and he strummed it.

He moved to her other foot, licking up the arch, tickling her so much she started to pull her foot away—but he held it in place, licking again before wrapping his lips around her middle toes and sucking. It felt so strange—so unexpected—but so wonderful. No one had ever sucked her toes before. It was intense.

When he left her toes to kiss the sole of her foot again, she giggled uncontrollably at the tickling feeling, jerking her foot back instinctually.

“No, no,” he scolded, holding her ankle hostage in his iron grip. “Breathe through the tickle to get to the pleasure of me revving up your nerve endings.”

“Breathe through the tickle?” she gasped as his merciless tongue licked the sole of her foot again. “I can’t, you’re killing me.”

But she closed her eyes and tried to do what he said, focusing on the sensations he provided her, and somehow she was on the verge of orgasm, just from him licking and sucking her feet and toes.

Finally, finally, he spread her legs wide, pulling her toward him by her ankles until her legs fell off the side of the bed. He knelt on the floor between them and placed a little kiss on her upper inner thigh.

Right near her femoral artery. The place she’d sliced open on Andrews just hours before.

Stop it, she thought. He deserved it. Forget Andrews, forget the femoral artery.

Mason’s tongue flicked out and he licked her labia, causing any thought of Andrews to fly out of her mind. He slid one finger deep into her pussy and she moaned as he used his other hand to spread her nether lips, exposing her clit.

He brought his entire mouth down on her pussy, eating her like she was dessert, sucking her clit and nibbling her slick folds. His finger pulsed inside her, feeling her inner crevices, finally tapping her G-spot over and over until she climaxed and released a stream of come over his hand.

He lapped it up like a hungry animal, nearly growling when she tried to push his head away.

“It’s too much,” she moaned, her hands on his long brown hair.

“I’m not done,” he said calmly, and he dove back down, licking her clit with such ferocity that she came again within seconds, the stimulation making her thrash about on the bed like a drowning woman.

Lifting his head, he grinned at her, his lips wet with her juices. “You’re delicious,” he said. “I want more.”

“Oh God, please—” Emily said. “I need you inside me. Fuck me, please, please.”

He stood, and with her lying on her back on the bed, she wrapped her legs around him, crossing her ankles above his ass so he was as close as she could get him. His huge, hard cock glistened with pre-come.

“Are you ready for me?” he asked.

No need to answer that. Her smile said it all. He thrust his cock inside her, filling her to the hilt as he pounded her again and again. She raised her hips to meet his thrusts, desperate for even more.

He reached down and rubbed her clit and she nearly screamed from the overstimulation, but then she came again—her third orgasm in minutes.

He picked up the pace, thrusting harder, faster, until she felt like the world had disappeared and all that mattered was Mason and the pleasure he could bring her.

“Emily,” he groaned, his cock pulsing inside her as he reached his climax. She held on tightly, clenching her inner muscles around him, milking every last drop from him.

When he finished, he pulled out and dropped down on the bed beside her. “That was incredible,” he said.

Emily smiled. “Yeah.”

He looked around the dark room. “It’s nice here—too bad we can’t hole up here for a while.”

Emily sat up. “We can’t stay in New York. I’m a wanted murderer now—and I don’t know how much longer our luck will last. We’ve got to get out of here, tomorrow.”

“I can understand why you never wanted to go back to Grand Central again,” he said softly. “When I went in to get you, I was really… shocked. Shocked by what I saw.”

“That’s nothing. You saw the main terminal. You didn’t even see where they kept the girls—me and Jenna, too. The Tracks.” She shuddered at the memory. “Do you suppose all the camps are like that, out there?”

Mason frowned, thinking. “I hope not. I’d like to think if there’s a good leader, then things would be better. If I were in charge of a camp under martial law, I’d execute anyone who raped or assaulted someone. Then there wouldn’t be anything like the Tracks.”

“But those women wouldn’t say they were raped,” Emily argued. “They’re trying to provide for themselves the only way they can, with the only thing of value they have left—their own bodies.”

“They’re being taken advantage of.”

“Of course they are,” Emily said. “But do you really think it’s better somewhere else?”

“Yes,” he said finally. “And we’ll find a good place. Even if we find some empty land, we can live like pioneers. Eat something more than rats.”

At the mention of food, Emily’s stomach rumbled. She hadn’t eaten in a long while.

“We can find the kitchen,” he said, apparently hearing her stomach growling. “This place must have a restaurant or bar in it somewhere. A hotel like this would have had room service, before the Pulse, anyway.”

“Okay,” Emily said, grabbing her robe off the floor. “I’ll follow you.”

Mason pulled his robe on as well and they left the room, walking down the hallway in silence to the stairwell.

“If it’s better out there,” Emily said slowly, her voice echoing in the empty corridor, “it almost makes it that much worse, the way things are at Grand Central.”

“What do you mean?”

“I feel bad, leaving all those girls there on the Tracks. What about Jenna? I was so glad to see her, even though I was terrified when they brought me back to the terminal. I miss her. And she’s one of the few who’s doing okay for herself there.”

“When we get out of the city, if we find another camp that seems to be in good order, we could inform the person in charge about the situation at Grand Central and see if they could send in troops to help.” He opened the door to the pitch-black stairwell and she stepped in, her footsteps sounding loud on the hard floor, cold under her bare feet.

“Let’s walk down to the first floor,” she suggested. They took the steps slowly, feeling their way to each landing.

They found a restaurant with impossibly high ceilings. Mason pulled a box of matches out of the pocket on his robe and lit one.

“Where’d you get the matches?” Emily whispered, even though they were alone.

“I grabbed them from my pack in case we need them,” he replied in a normal tone. The light illuminated the huge room for a moment, and Mason grabbed a narrow vase and cloth napkin off a table. The match went out and the room plunged into darkness once more.

Emily heard the sound of another match being struck, and then Mason held a torch of sorts—he had stuffed the napkin into the vase and lit the end on fire.

“Nice,” she said, smiling at his ingenuity.

“Let’s find us something to eat.” He led the way, the flames throwing eerie shadows along the walls. She felt the gun in her robe pocket hitting her thigh with each step, and it gave her comfort.

Just knowing she had it, just in case.

The kitchen was in the back. Mason ignored the large freezer, since anything in there would have spoiled long ago. The cupboards, like in the hospital, were bare. People had already scavenged anything worth eating.

“I found something,” he said, looking at the ground.

“Do I even want to know?”

“It’s a torn bag of rice.” He knelt down, running his hands through the grains. “With extra protein included.”

What?

“Maggots,” he said, as if she had spoken aloud. “If we boil them they’ll taste fine with the rice, and it really will be good protein.”

Emily sighed. “I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that, if that’s okay by you.”

Mason laughed and began scooping up the rice.

They ate in the restaurant, sitting on a long curvy padded bench. Emily had found some nice bowls, and silverware even.

Her rice tasted delicious, especially since she’d been so hungry. She pretended the boiled maggots were bits of tofu, and ate every last one.

“It’s like we’re on a date,” she joked.

“If it weren’t for the Pulse, you never would have looked twice at me,” Mason said.

“Well, you were in prison.”

“Even if I weren’t in prison. No way a girl like you would want anything to do with a guy like me. But now everything’s different, huh?”

“Well,” she said, “different skills are useful now. A man who was rich and powerful before the Pulse isn’t going to be as well off as someone who knows how to shoot, how to hunt, how to fight. Someone who’s used to staying in hotels like this one isn’t going to do as well as someone who knows how to camp out.”

“That’s true, but it’s not what I’m saying.” Mason seemed upset almost.

“What does it matter?”

“I don’t know. I guess it doesn’t.”

“You think I’m using you—for protection, is that it?” Emily chewed her rice slowly, giving herself time to think. Maybe it was true, that she was using him. But she also desired him like she’d never desired anyone before. That had to count for something, right?

“I know you are,” he said. He sounded like he stated a fact.

“Maybe you’re using me for sex.” She closed her mouth. That may have been going too far.

Mason looked at her. “Did it ever occur to you that maybe I’m using you for your skills as a nurse? You saved my life. I like having someone on my side who can save lives. And end them when necessary.”

Emily felt her heart race at the casual mention of how she’d offed Andrews.

“If it weren’t for me, you’d still have your apartment,” she reminded him. “And you’d have twice as much food for yourself.”

At that, he looked pointedly at her bowl, piled high with rice that he had found and cooked. “Damn right I would,” he said. “If you think I’m using you for sex as well as your lifesaving skills, then maybe I am. Doesn’t bother me a bit. So what if you’re using me, and I’m using you. It makes us even.”

12

EMILY’S cheeks burned as she looked at the tablecloth in the hotel restaurant. She should have known this conversation was coming.

“I may as well be one of the whores on the Tracks, then,” she whispered. “Giving you my body in exchange for your protection and food.”

“I suppose so.” But he didn’t look like he thought that was the case.

“But I can’t go back to Grand Central. And—Mason, I can’t leave those girls there. I have to tell them the truth.”

“What truth?”

“About…” Emily paused.

She’d never actually told Mason about the radio. About American Victory Radio and the man on the air, talking about communities being set up all over the country. About rebuilding.

She’d thought if he knew then he’d be in even more danger, but now they were in it together, for better or worse. He was sticking with her, even if only to have a willing woman to share his bed. And a nurse to fix him up.

“I have to tell you something, I think,” she said carefully.

“Okay.” He put his fork down.

“You know how the army went out of their way to find me. To track me down, and then to track you down. They were going to kill me.”

“It does seem strange. It’s a lot of effort to find one girl, even if you did steal a gun.”

“Who said anything about stealing a gun?” she asked, confused. “I mean, I did steal a gun, but after the fact.”

“You said you took something important that the army would want back. I assumed it was something like a gun. Or ammo. Or both.”

“You won’t believe me even if I tell you what I stole. I wish I still had it so I could show you—but they took it back.”

“Took what back?”

“The radio.”

Mason tilted his head as if he wasn’t sure he had heard her correctly. “Who cares about a radio? None of them work anymore, not since the Pulse.”

“This one worked. The radio had been kept in a… one of those things you told me about. A Faraday cage, I think you said.”

“Yeah, that’s right. A radio that works… When you say it worked, do you mean you could turn it on and get static, or an alarm or something?”

“Well, yes, that, but also—there was a radio station, broadcasting information. American Victory Radio.”

“Are you serious?”

“Yes.”

“Why didn’t you tell me this before?” Mason stood up, the last remnants of his rice forgotten.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t think it was a good idea. But now—since you’re coming with me, you should know there’s bound to be something out there for us to get to. America is rebuilding.”

“I’ll be caught again. Put back in prison. Or executed straight off.”

“We can both start fresh,” she said excitedly. “Why not? We have no papers, and there’s no electronic trail. We start fresh with new names, new identities, and new lives. Instead of being a pair of murderers on the run, we could be a nice married couple, for example.”

“Don’t get ahead of yourself.”

Emily blushed. “I didn’t mean for real. I meant—as a cover. Forget it. Forget I said anything. It doesn’t matter. We can be new people either way, we don’t have to be new people… together.”

“I guess so. But the people here, in New York—they know who we are. They definitely know who you are. I’m not sure how you’ll be able to hide in plain sight. You killed a soldier in a FEMA camp and escaped.”

“I know that,” she snapped. “Forget it. I’ll get out of the city and find myself some land somewhere like you said. An abandoned cabin or something. I have a gun now, I can figure out how to hunt. I’ll be fine.”

Mason stared at her in amusement. “Oh, so I’m free to go now, am I?”

“Maybe—maybe you could stick around with me until I find that cabin. And then you could go on your merry way and not worry about trying to take care of me.”

“What’s in it for me?” he asked.

She glared at him, but he smiled.

“Mason,” she whispered. “I can’t leave Jenna in that camp. All those girls. I can’t leave them like that.”

“What are you talking about? There’s nothing else to do.”

“They could come with us. There’s safety in numbers. A huge group of us walking together, we’d be safer from bandits and whatever else is out there.”

“So now instead of protecting and feeding one woman, I’ll have to find food and shelter for a dozen—two dozen? Maybe more.“

“I know it sounds crazy, but those women on the Tracks—they don’t even know they have other options. If they knew there was something else out there, that they could leave the camp and find another, better one where they wouldn’t be forced to prostitute themselves just to stay alive—”

“No, we can’t take care of all those people,” Mason said. “Besides, let’s say we’re on the road, the two of us, and we find a great camp where we’d feel safe staying. They might take in two refugees—but not a whole group. That’s more mouths to feed.”

Emily sighed. He was right. Rationally, she could see that. But how could she enjoy her own freedom when Jenna was still stuck there? Emily should have told her in that brief moment she’d seen Jenna when the soldiers brought Emily back to Grand Central, but she’d been so terrified.

“I want to tell them all. Tell them about the radio. They don’t even know that the army has been lying to us all—saying we’re all alone, that there’s no communication, that we’re the only survivors anyone’s heard about who haven’t resorted to cannibalism and chaos. Crazy stuff—but people believe it. I believed it.”

Mason shook his head emphatically. “Well, there’s no way to tell them, so no use in thinking about it.”

“There has to be a way. Even if I could just get a message to Jenna.”

“They’re all going to be looking for you. And since I left with you, they’re probably looking for me as well. It’s not like I can waltz in there, pretending to be a soldier, find Jenna, and tell her there’s a secret radio with a secret radio station that no one but you has ever actually seen—”

“What does that mean?” Emily stood up, adrenaline rushing through her as her anger level rose. “Are you insinuating that the radio isn’t real? They were going to kill me, Mason. You know that. They wouldn’t have bothered if it wasn’t real.”

“I believe you, Emily, but will the people at the camp believe it if they don’t see it for themselves? I’m sorry,” he said. “It’s just not going to work.”

“Actually,” she said, “I think your plan would work. Only one guard saw you. So you go in through a different entrance, with a different guard. Maybe wear a hat or something. You could find Jenna and tell her, and she can tell everyone else.”

“You’re asking a lot of me, Emily,” he said softly. “You’re asking me to risk my life.”

“Think of all those people. All those girls on the Tracks. Think of Jenna. Please, please, before we leave tomorrow—we have to tell them all the truth.”

Mason sighed. “Let me sleep on it. It’s late. Tomorrow morning we may wake up and be ready to get out of town.”

Emily grinned and threw her arms around him in delight. “Thank you!”

“Don’t thank me, I just said I’ll sleep on it.”

“I know.” But she couldn’t help but to keep smiling. The secret she carried with her for what felt like so long would finally be shared.

Knowledge was power—which was why the army didn’t want to share news of the outside world with the people under their martial law.

Now, the people would find out. And they would revolt.

Mason woke up to the sunlight pouring in through the windows of the abandoned hotel. The sheets tangled around him. Rolling over, he ran his hand over the spot where Emily had been when they finally fell asleep, hours before.

Where was she?

“Emily?” he called, hoping to hear an answer from the bathroom. Nothing.

He stood and stretched, naked. Hopefully their clothes would be dry from last night.

In the bathroom, Mason found his army shirt and cargo pants, dry, a little wrinkled from having been wrung out, but otherwise fine. They even smelled like the hotel shampoo Emily washed them with.

He dressed quickly, slipping his pistol into his waistband and pulling the rifle over his chest. The rifle had spent the night on the bedside table in case they got unwanted visitors.

No one had found them—maybe no one had even been looking. Given the bloody body they had left in Colonel Lanche’s quarters, Mason doubted that was the case.

Could he really risk his life by going back to Grand Central Terminal to talk to Jenna? Emily loved Jenna like a sister, and he knew she wouldn’t be able to forgive herself if Jenna never learned the truth.

What if Jenna decided she wanted to join him and Emily? He wasn’t equipped to take care of so many people.

But Emily was right—the people needed to know there were options—that they could leave the camp, leave the city, and find something better for themselves and their families.

If his sister Stephanie had been living in the camp, prostituting herself on the Tracks to survive, he’d want her to know the army hadn’t been truthful. That she didn’t have to be used like that.

Fuck.

The thought of Stephanie, and the fact that those women on the Tracks were undoubtedly someone’s sisters or daughters or mothers, made him realize he was going to do it. He would break back into the camp and find Jenna, tell her everything—and let her decide what to do after that.

If Jenna wanted to grab a megaphone and shout it from the rooftops, that was up to her. If she wanted to escape with someone on her own, also up to her. But he couldn’t have her coming with them.

He prayed she wouldn’t ask—because while Emily didn’t understand how hard it would be for just the two of them to survive, he knew allowing a third person to tag along could literally be the death of them all.

The door opened, and Mason jumped up, leveling the rifle at the doorway.

“Don’t shoot, it’s me,” Emily said with her hands up as she entered the room.

“Jesus, Em, you scared me.” He lowered the rifle. “Your shirt looks all clean.”

“Thanks. I’d forgotten how nice it is to not stink to high heaven. Then again, it probably saved me when…” She trailed off, not completing her thought.

She didn’t have to—Mason knew what she was getting at. This was why he had to go back to Grand Central, to save those girls. If only he could kick some soldier ass too while he was there.

“Where’d you go?” he asked.

“To the bathroom,” she said, blushing. “Then I found us breakfast.” She pulled a good amount of dandelions, roots and all, from her bag.

“You went outside by yourself, when you know you’re being hunted by the soldiers?”

“Calm down. I stayed in the hotel to use a toilet down the hall since they don’t flush, and I found the dandelions right outside the back door. I didn’t leave the area.”

He shook his head. “I’m sorry. Thank you for getting us something to eat.”

“So,” she said, handing him the dandelions. “Have you thought about it? Will you do it?”

“Yes. But I’ve never seen Jenna—how am I supposed to know who she is?”

Emily sat on the corner of the bed, thinking. “She’s always on the Tracks. You could sneak in, go down to the Tracks, and ask around for her. Everyone will assume you’re looking to get laid, so it won’t be weird for you to be asking for her.”

He shuddered at the thought of visiting the Tracks, but there was no other way. “What will you do while I’m there?”

“I’ll wait here, I guess. As much as I never want to go anywhere near Grand Central again, I wish I could go with you to help explain to the others what’s going on. Since I’m the one who saw and heard the radio, I mean.”

“No way in hell. You’ll get us both killed.”

“Yeah, that’s what I figured,” she sighed. “As soon as you’re done, meet me back here and we can head out.”

He strode toward her and pulled her close, kissing her lips. “If I’m not back in two hours, I want you to leave without me.”

“No. I’m not going anywhere without you.”

“We need to plan for every contingency. This mission shouldn’t take longer than an hour, so if I’m gone longer than two they’ve probably caught me. I don’t want them catching you too.”

She shook her head violently. “Take me with you.”

“You know that’s not happening.” Mason frowned and picked up his rifle. “Do I look like a soldier?”

Emily nodded, her face a mask of sadness. “Be safe.”

“Hey,” he said. “You don’t need me as much as you think you do. You’ll be fine, no matter what. Look how you took care of yourself yesterday at the camp.”

She’d killed a man to survive—and Mason had no doubt she could take care of herself if something happened to him. But the fact remained that a woman traveling alone was in grave danger.

He’d always been a loner himself—and he’d been doing fine living by himself before he found Emily. So why, now, did he suddenly find himself with an uncrushable desire to protect her, to keep her with him and keep her safe?

Even the thought of leaving her alone in the city, unguarded for two hours, made him queasy with fear for her safety.

What was it about Emily that he found so attractive, besides her obvious beauty? If they hadn’t been thrown together because of the Pulse, she never would have looked twice at him, and he probably would’ve thought she wasn’t his type.

He sighed. Not that it mattered who or what was his type anymore. He’d be lucky if he made it out of Grand Central alive. He went to the windowsill and placed one of the empty little shampoo bottles on it. Pointing to the shadow it made, he said, “When the shadow moves from where it is now to over here, it’ll have been two hours.”

She nodded. “I know how to tell time, Mason.”

“I guess I should go, then.”

“Wait, Mason,” she said. “Just in case they’re looking for a man with long brown hair—I think you should shave it all off.”

“Seriously?”

“I’ll miss the hair,” Emily said wistfully, “but I think it’ll help you blend in with the soldiers. I can do it right now with your knife and the shampoo.”

Shrugging, he smiled. “I guess I’m getting a new ’do.”

Emily couldn’t seem to smile back, even though he was trying desperately to lighten the mood. “It might save your life,” she whispered.

Having her say that slammed the point home. There was a very good chance he would die this morning.

13

Mason stood outside the side entrance to Grand Central Terminal and rubbed his freshly shorn head. The wind went right to his scalp now. He’d never realized how much his hair kept his head warm before. Finding a hat would become a priority, after he found Jenna, told her about the radio, and got the hell out of there.

It was a good thing Emily talked him into shaving his head. Looking around at the groups of soldiers standing outside the camp, he could see that most of them had shaved heads. Probably because of lice. It made him itch just thinking about it.

Wearing his camo shirt and army-issued M16 over his shoulder, he fit right in. The guard at the side entrance didn’t even look twice at him. Keeping his head down, he headed straight for the Tracks.

He kept walking until he got to an old subway train, each car filled with bedding and soiled mattresses. Mason felt uncomfortable, but curiosity warred with his dignity and ultimately won out.

He looked into each car as he passed. Some had women lying on the mattresses, napping, or maybe merely passed out. Others had men with their pants down, holding on to the metal grab bars above their heads, getting their cocks sucked.

A few of the cars seemed like what Mason always imagined whorehouses in the old Wild West were like. An older woman looked at him, maybe fifty years old. It was hard to tell since everyone was thin and tired and aged beyond their years. The darkness of the Tracks, lit only by the numerous garbage fires, hid the woman’s age as well.

She stood in the doorway of the subway car and lowered her shirt, her breast peeking out of the top, the nipple pinched to a dark pink color.

“I’ll give you the ride of your life for an extra ration, hon,” she called to him.

That woman had probably been a business woman, or a soccer mom, or God knows what else before the EMP hit, and now she was a whore. She had no choice.

Mason felt his cock twitch in his pants and he shook his head, feeling his ears turn pink. “I’m looking for Jenna,” he said.

“Jenna’s nice, but I’ve got experience,” she cooed.

“Where is she?” he demanded. The woman frowned and pointed down a few more car lengths. “Thank you.”

Mason hurried in the direction the woman had pointed. A younger woman sat on the hard plastic subway seats, the door to her car permanently shoved open, letting in light from the garbage fire. She perked up as he walked by, peering into her car. She didn’t get up; she just slowly spread her legs until he was staring at the glow of the fire illuminating her cunt.

“I heard you were looking for me,” she said, her legs still obscenely spread. “I’m Jenna.”

Mason closed his eyes, turning his head. “Stand up,” he said gruffly.

She stood immediately, and Mason felt an uneasy sense of control over her that he shouldn’t, by right, have.

“My name is Mason. I’m a friend of Emily’s.”

Jenna’s eyes widened and she reached her hand out to him, drawing him inside the subway car. “Is she okay?”

“Yeah, she’s fine. But she can’t stay at the camp, because they want to kill her. She sent me back here to give you a message.”

“I don’t understand,” Jenna whispered. “What do you mean, sent you back here? You’re a soldier, don’t you live here at the camp too?”

“Not exactly,” he said. No need to give her more information than she needed. As much as Emily cared for her friend, he had no idea who this woman was or if she could be trusted.

“Why do they want to kill her?” she asked, her eyebrows knitting in concern.

“I don’t have much time. You need to listen.”

Jenna nodded, her attention rapt.

“She found a working radio, and—”

“That’s impossible,” Jenna interrupted. “None of the radios work since the Pulse. Nothing electronic works.”

“This radio had been kept safe from EMPs in something called a Faraday cage. Not only does the radio work, but there’s a radio station. American Victory Radio. I didn’t get to hear it myself before the soldiers took it back, but Emily says the radio talked about rebuilding happening all over the US.”

Jenna laughed. “If there really was a radio, don’t you think the army would have told us?”

“That’s my point. They’re lying to everyone. The way this camp is run—Grand Central is a hellhole. You know that—hell, you were ready to fuck me a few minutes ago, for what? For some food?”

Jenna scowled. “I’m alive, and that’s more than I can say for most of the people who lived in New York City. So don’t get all high and mighty on me, Mason, or whoever the hell you are.”

“I’m sorry,” he said, taking her hand. “You’re right. I just—you don’t have to be here, doing this. Emily wanted you to know—wanted all the women on the Tracks, all the families struggling to survive in Grand Central—that there are other options. Other camps, other communities, whole cities being rebuilt.”

“So what am I supposed to do, huh?” she asked. “Just up and leave? Leave guaranteed food and shelter for the open road, where I’ll probably be killed or die of starvation?”

She stopped cold and looked at him. “Oh God—that’s what you guys are going to do, isn’t it.”

Mason nodded.

“I wish you the best of luck, but there’s no way I could do the same.”

“Will you tell the others? That there’s a radio and communication, and the army’s been lying about it?”

Jenna smiled wryly. “You trying to get me killed?”

“I take that as a no.” Mason took a deep breath and stepped out of the subway car. “Good luck, Jenna. Take care of yourself.”

“I always do,” she said. Then, dropping her voice to a whisper, “tell Emily I said thank you for trying to help us, and I’m sorry.”

He nodded. It was time to get the hell out of the Tracks, and never look back.

Emily looked over at the shadow on the hotel windowsill. It had been less than an hour, but it felt like forever. What if something had happened to him? What would she do? She couldn’t very well do as he said and leave on her own.

Someone rapped on the door and Emily jumped, startled. Picking up her pistol, she held it by her side as she peered through the peephole in the door.

It was Mason. She unbolted the door and wrapped her arms around him in relief.

“Where’s Jenna?” she demanded. “Didn’t you find her?”

“I found her.”

“And?”

“She didn’t want to leave, Em. She didn’t want to take the risk of leaving what she knows.”

Emily set her pistol down, tears coming to her eyes. “But—but—didn’t you tell her? About how they’ve been lying, about the radio, about—”

“I told her all of it.”

“Is she going to tell everyone else?”

Mason shook his head sadly. “She can’t, you know that. Then she’d be a target, same as you were. She’s surviving right now, and she can’t jeopardize that.”

Emily took a shaky breath, trying to calm herself. “But, all those women on the Tracks…”

“We need to go, Emily. Someone could have recognized me or followed me back. It’s time to leave, for real this time.”

Nodding, she stood slowly. “I had this silly idea, that maybe Jenna and I could be roommates again, and we’d live in a house somewhere and help each other out, and I could help take care of her, the way she took care of me on the Tracks.”

Mason didn’t respond. Instead, he lifted the big pack he had and centered it on his back. “Let’s go.”

She followed him, feeling like she had rocks in her stomach, churning around as she thought of Jenna in the light of the fire on the Tracks.

Outside the hotel, she noticed Mason looking carefully in both directions before stepping out into the road, almost as if he expected a car to come careening down the street. Instead, most of the cars were still stalled wherever they had been on the night of the Pulse. Crossing the street, they stayed near the buildings for cover.

They walked in silence, Mason constantly turning his head and looking behind them, making sure they weren’t being followed.

“I wish we had a car that worked,” he muttered.

“We can keep an eye out for one. An old car.”

“I wish,” he said, walking briskly so she had to double her stride to keep up. “All the cars have been snatched up already.”

“Maybe someone would want to trade for one.”

“Unless we were trading a year’s worth of bear meat or something, enough to feed a whole family… no, even then I can’t imagine anyone giving up a car.” Mason shook his head. “I was only thinking out loud anyway. We’re going to hoof it, obviously. You’ve really got to keep up—for your own safety as well as mine. We can’t afford to get caught.”

Emily groaned inwardly and walked faster. She couldn’t start complaining, even though they’d barely walked a mile and she already felt like she wanted to take a break. If she complained too much, he might second-guess his decision to travel with her.

And she needed him to keep her safe. She wanted him to keep her safe, too.

They walked in companionable silence, the only sounds in the formerly loud city the pounding of their feet on the pavement. The streets were empty. With no people making noise, no car alarms going off, no traffic, no horns, no shouts, no boom boxes—it was no longer the New York City Emily had grown accustomed to before the Pulse.

She looked up in surprise to see they had walked all the way to the edge of the dirty Hudson River. Her bag started to feel heavy, and she really wanted to rest. But they couldn’t rest—not till they were out of the city. And on foot, that meant walking for hours and hours.

They would follow the river, keeping it on their left, and eventually that should lead them out of the city. Going north and getting upstate would be the best way to get into the country fast. Rushing to catch up to Mason, she tripped over her own foot and fell to the middle of the street, crying out in surprise more than pain as she hit the ground.

“Are you okay?” Mason asked, reaching his large hand down to help her back up. His biceps flexed as he pulled her to standing and she found herself smiling at him like a fool.

“I’m sorry,” she said. “I’m just really exhausted—I’m not used to walking so much.”

“Well, we have to keep going. We’ve only been walking for a few hours. What are you going to do when we’ve been walking for days?”

“Days?” she asked faintly. She’d never really thought about what it meant to walk to freedom before. The idea of getting out of the city had always just been that—an idea. Now it was becoming a reality.

And that reality involved an unholy amount of physical exertion.

“This is why I knew this was a bad idea to begin with,” Mason said darkly.

Emily felt anger burst up through her exhaustion at his remark. But he was tired and hungry too, she reminded herself. It was almost like he was asking for a fight. Now would be a really good time for her to keep her mouth shut.

“Did you have a better idea?” she shot back. “One that involves staying in Manhattan but not getting killed?” Keeping her mouth shut wasn’t really her thing.

He scowled and they kept walking, following Route 9A as it snaked alongside the choppy water that slushed up against the barges. A terrible smell filled the air and Emily saw it was the New York Sanitation Department—which didn’t smell nice even before the Pulse. Now, with no one doing any sanitizing at all, it was a putrid mess.

Bile rose in her throat and she strove to breathe through her mouth so she couldn’t smell the garbage on the river.

Eventually, after what seemed like they’d been walking forever, thick trees hid the river. They were on the Henry Hudson Parkway, and on their way out.

There were so many cars, many of them damaged, either from crashes after the Pulse suddenly stopped their engines or from vandals after the fact.

Emily and Mason walked, sometimes together, sometimes single file. Mason didn’t seem tired at all. Emily, on the other hand, was ready to call it quits. Her feet felt bruised and broken—every step torture. The dandelions she’d eaten hours before no longer made her feel full. It was like eating a puny salad and then running a marathon.

“Mason, we have to stop,” she said. He shook his head and kept walking.

Emily trudged forward despite her body’s resistance. Her stride became slower and slower until Mason was so far ahead of her she’d never catch up unless he stopped to wait.

Mason didn’t even notice—he kept going.

“Mason!” she called. He finally turned around and looked at her.

“What are you doing? We have to keep going.”

“I’m trying, I really am. But there’s only so far sheer willpower will take me when my legs refuse to cooperate.”

“You’re going to get us killed pulling stunts like this.”

She didn’t respond. It’s not like she was intentionally limping along at the speed of a slug.

“Okay,” he said. “I’ll find us someplace out of sight to take a nap.”

Mason walked over to a silver Lexus with a leather interior. The door was unlocked. Opening the rear door, he gestured her inside. “Ladies first.”

Emily slid into the car, grateful to sit on a comfortable seat. The sun shining through the windows warmed the interior of the car. The leather felt smooth beneath her palms.

“Some guy must have been really bummed about losing this car,” Mason said. His sheer size seemed to take up the whole back seat, clouding out all rational thoughts from her mind with his enormous shoulders filling her field of vision. “You can rest now. Take a nap,” he said, gently pulling her down so her head rested in his lap. “I’ll keep an eye out.”

She smiled up at him. The bulge in his pants made all thoughts of napping fly right out of her head. “I’m very glad we stopped to rest,” she whispered, “but I don’t want to sleep just yet.”

She unzipped his pants, freeing his cock, which started to harden even as she licked her lips, preparing herself. Emily made a conscious decision she wasn’t going to waste even a second thinking about the circumstances surrounding the man she killed. She refused to let the late Private Andrews ruin blow jobs for her forever.

Taking a deep breath in anticipation, she lowered her face to Mason’s lap and ran her tongue down his shaft.

“More,” he said, and she swirled her tongue around the tip of his cock, licking the little slit at the end, teasing it with her wet caress until a drop of pre-come shone at the top of his cock, rewarding her efforts. She licked it off immediately.

“I need more,” he gasped, grabbing hold of her hair, fixing her head in place. She wrapped her lips around the head of his cock, sucking slowly until he was completely in her mouth. He groaned and slowly thrust back and forth, his hips raising to meet her mouth.

She held his heavy balls in one hand, gently massaging them. Suddenly he stiffened and ejaculated a steady stream of hot, salty come into her mouth. She sucked harder, swallowing it all. When he finished she sat up, pleased to see the satisfied smile on his face.

“Thank you,” he said. “That was an unexpected pleasure.”

“I needed something to eat, since I’m hungry,” she teased. “And your cock is very tasty.”

Mason smiled. “You know, I heard semen is a good source of protein and calories.”

“That’s not exactly true. There’s only like five to seven calories in the average man’s semen. But,” she said thoughtfully, “it does contain some fructose and protein secreted by the prostate gland to give the sperm something to energize them for their swim.”

He laughed, running his hands through her hair as she closed her eyes. “Where’d you learn that?”

“I’m a nurse,” she reminded him. “Or was the knock on your head so bad that you forgot who nursed you back to health?”

“You should rest now, while you can,” Mason said, his tone serious again. “But you have to take me seriously when I say we need to get out of the city.”

She sighed. “I know. Let’s go now, while we still have some sun.”

Mason opened the car door and slid out. He held his hand out to her and pulled her out. She was still exhausted, but the small break had revitalized her enough to start the journey again.

Mason walked a bit in front of her, his heavy footsteps pounding on the cracked pavement. His ass looked amazing in the cargo pants, but the camo shirt he wore, with the rifle slung over his shoulder, and now even his short hair, made him look so much like a soldier she had to keep reminding herself he wasn’t.

If he were, he would have killed her by now.

14

A man stood by the side of the Hudson River Parkway, his face dirty, his hair so long it had become dreadlocked. He mumbled to himself, which was the only reason Emily noticed him. He was so filthy he almost blended into the landscape.

“Mason!” she hissed under her breath. “Look.”

They both ducked down, staring at the man. He talked animatedly to an invisible companion.

“How is that guy still alive?” Mason wondered aloud.

The man saw them and shrieked, throwing his hands in the air.

“It’s okay,” Emily said softly. “We’re not bad guys.”

The man pointed shakily to Mason. “He is.”

“No, no, it’s just a costume. Like playing pretend.” Emily walked slowly toward him.

Mason held her back, putting his arm out. “What are you doing?” he asked her.

“He needs help,” she said. Then again, he wasn’t starving to death. He actually looked quite well fed. But how? “Where do you live?” she asked the man.

“At the hospital. We all do.” He grinned, his mouth filled with rotten teeth. He was doing something with his lips, moving them around all weird. It reminded Emily of psychiatric patients who had been on antipsychotics for so long that they produced irreversible extrapyramidal symptoms—like that lip-smacking thing. Although this guy, like everyone else, was off his meds.

Hospital. Must be the New York State Psychiatric Institute—it wasn’t far away.

Mason nudged her. “Maybe he was really obese to begin with,” he whispered, as if he could read Emily’s mind when she wondered how he could be a normal weight while everyone else starved. “Hey!” he said, startling the man. “What do you eat?”

The man kept grinning, smacking his lips in that freaky way. “Are you hungry? There’s lots to eat at the hospital. You can come, if you want. Come.”

Emily’s stomach rumbled at the mention of food. Was it possible? Maybe, if a food truck had broken down nearby, or if they had just had their kitchen fully stocked, and then everyone’s family came and got them, so there were only a few people left to share the food… no. No way.

“It’s a trap,” Mason said warily.

“Or maybe they really have a ton of food at the hospital,” Emily said. “We can go check it out, see if the other patients are willing to feed some travelers, and go on our way.”

Mason nodded. “But I’m keeping my gun in my hand.”

Emily looked back at the psychiatric patient. “I’m Emily, what’s your name?”

“Chaz. You can follow me. You’ll like it where we live.”

Emily took Mason’s hand, for support, and they followed Chaz down off the highway. His feet, Emily, saw, were barefoot and bloody. She shook her head sadly. All the doctors and nurses must have left the hospital, leaving those poor patients to fend for themselves.

Like she had done to her patients.

No! That’s wasn’t true. Her supervisor had told her to leave, told her everyone would be okay. But maybe all her supervisor really wanted was to feel better about leaving as well.

She didn’t want to think about it. Everyone who hadn’t evacuated was dead now anyhow.

“This doesn’t feel right,” Mason whispered. “We should leave.”

“I want to see how he’s so well fed,” Emily argued. “As much as I love living off your come, it’s not really going to keep me going indefinitely.”

Mason sighed. “You’re right.”

Chaz was apparently excited to be showing them around his hospital. “Welcome welcome,” he muttered, still smacking his lips.

Emily stepped inside, nearly gagging at the horrible stench. There was no dedicated toilet area, and from the urine and feces covering the tiles, the patients had been going wherever the mood struck them.

Mason covered his nose with his shirt, and Emily would have had to follow suit if she weren’t so used to horrible smells from her career as a nurse. Instead, she breathed through her mouth.

There was an underlying smell, too. Like something rotting.

Emily and Mason followed Chaz down the hallway. She peered into one of the rooms. A putrefied corpse was in restraints on the bed. Emily could imagine what had happened.

After the Pulse, the nurses tried to keep everyone safe, but after a month, maybe less, the meds would have run out, and the patients would be, at least some of them, dangerous. As much as modern psychiatry preferred to not restrain patients, if it was a choice between the patient killing himself or someone else and pulling the old restraints out of the supply room, Emily knew all too well what would happen. What did happen.

And then—the nurses left, or died themselves. And the patient was left to die, strapped to the bed. The thought horrified her.

She wanted to throw up, but there was nothing in her stomach.

“Come on!” Chaz said. They continued down the hall. A doctor sat behind the nurse’s station—dead.

He had a bloody wound on his head and his skin was blue and mottled. One of the patients must have killed him—or maybe, she reasoned, he had an accident and died, and they had set him in his rightful place. She shuddered.

“That’s Doctor Gupta,” Chaz said cheerfully. “Good doctor, good doctor.”

Emily and Mason looked at each other. She realized now the stupidity in coming here. “Chaz, we’re hungry, do you have food for us?” she asked sweetly, trying to redirect him.

“Yes, yes,” he said. “This is my girlfriend, Amy,” he said, pointing to an older woman, who looked to be a bit chubby. How was that possible?

“Hi, Amy,” Emily said carefully. Amy ignored her, her eyes glazed.

Then she opened her chapped lips and belched. Without looking at Chaz, she said, “Make me dinner.”

Chaz grinned at her and turned away, going into a room across the hall.

Emily looked at Mason quizzically. He shrugged, standing awkwardly in front of Amy, who continued to ignore them.

Chaz came out of the room fifteen minutes later holding a plate with a chunk of pink meat of some sort on it, blackened in places from the fire it seemed he had grilled it on. “Here,” he said, kissing Amy on top of her greasy hair as he handed her the plate. Amy grunted and started shoveling the meat into her mouth, barely pausing, it seemed, to chew.

It smelled, and looked, like pork. But where had they gotten pork from? There certainly were no pigs roaming around New York City that Emily could think of. Her stomach grumbled again and she looked at Mason.

Mason coughed. “Where’d you get the meat, Chaz?”

Chaz smiled that rotten-toothed smile of his and gestured for them to follow him. “We have plenty, you can have some.”

At this, Amy looked up. “No, they can’t. They don’t live here.”

“Maybe they will live here,” Chaz said. “At least they move around and talk, which is nice. More than the others. More than the doctor.”

Emily got a sinking feeling in her stomach. It was possible, she realized, that Chaz and Amy were the only survivors here. The “others” who lived there, if they were anything like Doctor Gupta… were dead.

She gulped, suddenly not hungry anymore, not wanting to follow Chaz into the room with the fire and the meat.

But Mason was already walking with him, and Emily couldn’t stay alone with Amy. She hurried to Mason’s side, grabbing his shirt desperately. “I was wrong, this place is bad, we need to leave,” she whispered.

“I want to see what they’re eating,” Mason said.

Chaz opened the door. Inside a small fire was going in a metal wastebasket topped with a homemade grill made out of wire hangers. Clever.

And hanging over the hospital bed was a carcass. A human carcass.

Grand Central Terminal

JENNA

Jenna didn’t know what to make of Emily’s message about the radio. The fact that the army, which was supposed to keep her safe, had been lying to her all this time about the outside world made her so angry she could spit.

Part of her wanted to tell everyone. To let all the girls on the Tracks know there was another way, another life, perhaps. Out there—outside of Grand Central. But there’s no point, she realized sadly.

If even Jenna wasn’t willing to risk being cold and hungry and in danger from bandits and who knows what else out there on the road, why should she expect anyone else to want to take on that risk?

But they should at least know.

Or should they?

Jenna grit her teeth. She wished she didn’t have this information, so she could go on without worrying about all this stuff. But she did have it. So now what?

It would be nice to hear the radio. What had Mason called it? American Victory Radio. It used to be she’d come home from work and veg out on the couch, watching whatever dumb reality show was on at the time. Now she hadn’t even seen a computer screen or a television in ages. And since the soldiers wouldn’t let her bring anything with her to the camp, she didn’t even have any books to read.

If only she could listen to that radio, she could find some paper and write down what the broadcast said, and post it for everyone to see. But there was no way that could happen.

Or could it?

She stood up from the hard plastic subway car bench and stretched her legs. Peering her head out of the car, she saw a lone soldier walking down the Tracks. Excitement rushed through her at the thought of the winning combination of food and sex—both of which would soon be hers if she played her cards right.

“Well, hello there, Private,” she said brightly, stepping out of the subway car. The guy, a younger kid, probably barely twenty-one, smiled at her shyly. “Yeah, you, honey,” she said to him, smiling, putting on her friendliest face.

“Hi.” He coughed uncomfortably, looking at his shoes.

“I’m Jenna.” She stuck her hand out to him, and when he took it she gently pulled him toward her so he could properly feel her body against his. That one trick almost always clinched the deal for her.

“Will,” he said, still not looking at her.

“Will,” she said, “you look like you want to get laid by a woman who knows what she’s doing, am I right?”

His blush, which rose all the way up to his hairline, answered for him.

“Do you have food, Will?”

He nodded, patting his pockets. He took out a half of a sandwich wrapped in paper. The bread, she knew, was half sawdust, to help fill their bellies. The meat was almost definitely chopped rat. But it looked good.

“That’s great, Will,” she said encouragingly. “Let me eat this first and then you can lie back and let me do all the work.” She figured he was new enough not to know she usually didn’t get to eat until after, but she wasn’t going to back out, so she didn’t see the problem in changing things up a bit.

Will nodded and handed her the sandwich.

It tasted pretty good. She liked to pretend it was something else—maybe a chopped steak sandwich on bakery bread. When she finished, she stripped her top off, letting it fall onto the floor of the subway car.

Will, she could see, didn’t need any prepping—his erection strained against his pants. Running her fingers to his waistband, she unzipped his fly, setting his cock free. He may have been young but his cock was all man. She smiled and pushed him down onto the mattress in the corner of the car.

He lay on his back, unbuttoning his shirt, his dog tags lying on his hairless chest.

Jenna straddled his head, holding herself up so she didn’t completely crush him. “First you gotta get me off, soldier,” she purred. Once again, that was hardly the rule, but Will was a newbie so she may as well have some fun.

He licked her pussy tentatively, then harder, getting into it. She moaned as he twirled his tongue around her slick folds, reaching up and holding her ass in his hands.

It wasn’t long before a wave of pleasure crashed over her and she climaxed, moaning as the young man sucking her clit kept going, either because he didn’t know she had come or because he was enjoying himself so much. An aftershock hit her, making her gasp and buck her hips against his mouth.

She pulled herself off his face, still straddling him, and leaned forward to kiss him, liking the taste of her come on his lips.

“Did I do that right?” he asked.

“That was incredible,” she said truthfully. “You’ve got skills, sweetheart.”

He grinned. “I did the alphabet with my tongue. That’s what the other guys said to do when I asked. Although,” he said, a wry smile on his face, “they also said I didn’t have to eat pussy if I didn’t want to out here on the Tracks.”

Damn. “Well, you’re a true man, and a true man likes to eat pussy,” she said, winking. He puffed his chest in apparent pride.

“Now tell me, Will,” she said, positioning her wet pussy over his cock and sliding down slowly, making him gasp. “A man like you probably knows all sorts of things.”

“Like what?” he asked, reaching up and touching her breasts, seemingly mesmerized by how they moved as she gyrated her hips.

“Like, what sorts of things does the radio say?” She rocked forward so his cock hit her G-spot perfectly.

“Oh yeah, I know about that,” he said, still watching her breasts bounce. He gave an experimental pinch to her nipple and she squealed, making him grin in delight. “They’ve rigged whole camps to run on solar power generators and windmills. They’ve got lights that go on at sundown and stay on until bedtime at ten o’clock at night.” He pinched her nipple again, harder this time, but she barely noticed. The news about there being other camps with electricity hit her like a shock wave.

“Where? Where are those camps?”

He shrugged, then groaned as she started riding him faster. “Not just military camps. Communities, too, I think. Nowhere in the city, though,” he said, frowning.

Jenna couldn’t believe it. Yeah, Mason had told her some of it from Emily’s message, but whole communities with access to electricity? She imagined sitting around a comfortable room, fresh from a shower, wearing clean clothes, gathered around a table lit with a lamp instead of a smoky garbage fire, maybe even listening to a radio, talking with friends. The thought was too good to be true. It sounded like paradise.

A sharp slap to her ass brought her back to reality. She looked down at the young soldier in surprise. Where had he learned that? She rode him faster and he grabbed her hips, grunting as he came inside her.

“Hey,” he said, his cock wilting as she climbed off of him. “I don’t think I’m allowed to talk about that stuff.”

“It will be our secret, Will,” she promised. Leaning over, she kissed his lips. They still tasted faintly like her. “I won’t tell if you don’t.”

“If you tell,” he said, suddenly looking much older than his years, “you’ll be in danger, I think. So don’t go telling anyone, seriously.” He paused, then looked at her warily. “How’d you even know about the radio in the first place?”

“Everyone knows about it,” she lied instinctually. Because if everyone knew about it, they’d be less likely to consider her an expendable threat to their secrets.

“Everyone?”

“Ye-yes.”

The young soldier’s eyes darkened as he pulled his clothes back on. “I heard the only one who knows about it is the whore who murdered Private Andrews. Do you know anything about that?”

Murdered? Emily murdered someone?

That was impossible. She knew Emily, loved Emily. There was no way. The surprise and shock on Jenna’s face must have convinced Will of her sincerity, because he stopped looking at her so suspiciously.

“This was fun, Jenna,” he said, his tone lighter. “I’d like to visit with you again, if that’s okay.”

Jenna laughed. Such the gentleman. He could see her whenever the hell he wanted, and there wasn’t a damn thing she could do about it. So it was sweet for him to ask, almost like he’d asked her out on a date.

“I’d like that,” she said.

When he left, she sat down, trying to absorb everything new she had just learned. Maybe she really should talk to the other girls on the Tracks.

And maybe they really should get the hell out of Grand Central.

15

OH MY God, Emily thought, feeling the walls of the New York State Psychiatric Institute closing in on her. Chaz and his psych patient girlfriend Amy were cannibals.

The sight of the human carcass on the hospital bed with chunks of meat filleted off of it was too much to bear. Emily turned and threw up bile onto the floor, her stomach cramping painfully.

Maggots were crawling through the corpse’s rotting flesh. Chaz had apparently been cutting meat from the thighs to cook for him and Amy that evening.

“You’re welcome to eat,” Chaz said. “Eat! It’s good.”

Emily felt like she might cry. Did Chaz and Amy even understand what they were doing? She didn’t think so. Off their medications, they were so far gone they believed that their friends and doctors and nurses were still with them, albeit quieter.

Mason took Emily firmly by the hand and led her out of the room. “Chaz,” he said, “is there anyone left who still moves and talks?”

“No.” Chaz grinned again, and Emily felt another wave of nausea come over her.

Mason looked at her, concern creasing his forehead, and took her hand again. “Thank you, Chaz, for your hospitality. Say good-bye to Amy for us.”

They ran, rushing down the hall, trying not to see the corpses or smell the urine and feces and rotting flesh. Mason pushed the door open and they flew out of the building, gasping for fresh air.

“Keep going,” Mason said, urging her forward. She ran with him until they were back on the Hudson River Parkway, where they slowed to a steady pace.

It was starting to get dark, and colder.

“I can’t believe that,” she whispered, when she felt able to speak again.

“I knew something wasn’t right, for him to be looking so well fed.”

“Are others doing that, you think? Eating the dead?”

He nodded. “Yes, I imagine they are. But there’s something that feels so wrong about it, you know? I remember hearing that story about the people who survived a plane crash in the middle of nowhere, and there was no food, just frozen dead people, and they ate the dead people to live. I don’t know if I could do that.”

“I don’t think I would be able to keep it down. I’d vomit at the thought, much less actually having it in my mouth.” Bile rose in her throat again, as if to prove her point.

“If I thought you were going to die, though, from starvation, I’d want you to eat a person,” Mason said, looking at her even as he kept walking.

“I wouldn’t do it.”

“I wouldn’t be giving you a choice, I imagine,” he said softly.

“There’s no point in talking about it,” she said, although she feared if they kept walking without food for much longer, they would get to a desperate situation. “I know you want to get out of the city, but we need to find someplace to spend the night. It’s going to get cold and dark and I can’t imagine continuing like this.”

He sighed. “All right. And we need to find some food, too.”

She nearly laughed with exhilaration. “Great.”

“Where do you think we should take shelter?” Mason looked around at the numerous stalled cars.

“I have an idea,” she said. “We’re not far from Fort Tryon Park, and The Cloisters. We can stay there.”

“That sounds perfect.”

“I haven’t been there since I was a kid,” she said. “We went on a field trip there. It’s incredible—it’s all devoted to the art and architecture of medieval Europe. They have a medieval garden, even, with stuff growing in it that would have grown back then. It was pretty cool.”

“I hope punks haven’t vandalized it the way they’ve vandalized everything else,” Mason said. They walked faster now that they had a place to rest in mind.

“Maybe you’ll find some squirrels or pigeons or something—anything—in the park.”

“It’ll depend on how many people have already hunted the area,” he said, as they found their destination. A huge sign said FORT TRYON PARK. Underneath, in smaller letters, it said THE CLOISTERS, HEATHER GARDEN, CAFÉ. And underneath that, it said A DIVISION OF THE METROPOLITAN MUSEUM OF ART.

“Huh,” Mason said as they walked past into the park. “I didn’t know it was a branch of the Met. I wonder if there’s anything left in that café?”

“Doubtful, but worth a look.” Something moved in the corner of her vision, and she froze. “I think I saw something. A rabbit, maybe.” She pointed to a patch of trees about ten yards away.

Mason picked up his rifle, looking through the scope. “I don’t see anything. But I can set a few traps in the woods around here, and we can check them in a few hours.”

Mason wished Emily would walk faster. She couldn’t help the fact that her legs were much shorter than his, he knew. But it was still frustrating as all hell. Night approached quickly this time of year, and they needed to get inside. Already the spring air felt uncomfortably cold as the sun set.

The Cloisters loomed in front of them. The building lay relatively low compared to the skyscrapers in Manhattan, but a tower jutted up from the bricks menacingly. From what Mason could see, the building was made of stone and bricks and had a distinctly old feel to it.

They entered an area that looked like a cathedral. Mason looked up at the arches in the ceiling. Stone pillars surrounded them. “This place is amazing.”

“There’s a whole bunch of different sections,” Emily said. “I wonder if the art is still here?”

Walking through, they came across a huge tapestry hung on a stone wall. It was of a unicorn in a corralled area. “That fence is pretty low,” Mason said, pointing to the corral. “I bet that unicorn could jump over it if he wanted to.”

“Maybe he likes being there. Or, maybe it makes him feel safe.” She peered closer to the tapestry. “Is the unicorn wounded?”

Mason pointed to the woven tree depicted above the animal in the tapestry. “Pomegranates are dripping on him. The unicorn’s fine,” he said, laughing.

“You know,” she said, “if we’re going to sleep here, we need to build a fire where it can’t hurt any of the art.”

“Of course,” Mason said, slightly offended. He may have been a convict but that didn’t mean he couldn’t appreciate the value of art. He was glad vandals hadn’t destroyed the place.

Emily turned and looked up at him, but then her expression changed. Her mouth dropped open in surprise as he heard something whiz past his ear.

Something—a rock?—hit Emily in the face, causing a burst of blood.

She screamed and grabbed her face as Mason whirled around, his finger on the trigger of his rifle. Rocks continued to fly, one hitting him hard in the shoulder

An old man stood his ground, pelting rocks with the ferocity of a cornered animal.

Mason lifted his weapon. “I’ll shoot!” he shouted.

The old man didn’t listen, instead, he charged forward, hefting something in his hand, a club of some sort. He threw it, probably aiming for Mason, but it clattered past him, ricocheting off of Emily’s leg. Her scream echoed in the chamber.

Mason pulled the trigger. The old man flew backward from the force of the bullet, a surprised look crossing his face. Emily screamed again, covering her ears at the sound of the shot.

He looked around, keeping his rifle up. If the old man had any friends, Mason didn’t want to find out the hard way. Emily had fallen silent. “Emily?”

She didn’t respond. Mason knelt by her side. “Are you okay?”

She held her face, blood seeping between her fingers, and didn’t answer him. Mason pulled her hand away from her face to look at the damage.

All he could see was blood. “Emily, come on, let’s clean you up.”

She pulled out of his grasp angrily. Was she in shock? Was she really that injured?

She shook her head, her eyes blazing. “Get away from me.”

Mason stood, confused. He looked over at the fallen old man who attacked them. Poor guy—he was probably the reason The Cloisters hadn’t been desecrated. If only Mason hadn’t needed to shoot him. But he’d do it again in a heartbeat if it meant protecting Emily.

“Let’s go to the other side of the building,” he suggested, “so we’re not sleeping with a corpse.”

“I can’t believe you… killed him. You just… shot him. You didn’t even think about it.”

Mason shook his head in surprise. “He attacked you, I had no choice.”

She didn’t respond.

“Emily, I’m going to get you some water and you’re going to wash off that blood. You’re the nurse, not me, so you need to figure out how badly he hurt you.”

Emily shook her head, avoiding his gaze. “Just leave.”

This was ridiculous. She had to be under some kind of emotional trauma from being attacked. She got hit in the face with a rock—what if she had a concussion?

Mason couldn’t leave her bleeding and alone with a corpse while she was so upset. And he had no way of knowing if the dead old man had companions who might be a further danger to her.

Mason stood over Emily, staring down at her. She looked so tiny, curled on the marble floor like that, still holding her face in her hands. The blood flow seemed to have stopped, but then again, what did he know. He needed her to look at it herself. “Emily, I’m not asking. Get up.”

She looked up at him now in anger, finally acknowledging his presence, but she refused to get up.

“I’m bigger than you,” he said calmly, “and don’t think I won’t use that to my advantage if I think it will protect you. If you don’t get up, I’m carrying you, and there’s nothing you can do about it.”

At this, Emily screamed, a howl of anger that shocked him with its intensity. “Fuck you, Mason!”

Mason picked her up, holding her easily even as she swung her arms and legs in anger. Her sudden fear toward him couldn’t be real, could it? He was only trying to help her.

The thought that Emily would seriously want him to leave and not stay with her, protect her, at least until she got someplace safe, made him feel all mixed up inside. On one hand, he’d never asked to be burdened with the responsibility of protecting this woman. On the other hand, now that he had the mission it felt wrong to give it up before she was truly safe.

What if something happened to her? Even seeing her get attacked, seeing her now, with blood on her face, got him so upset… and scared. If he was honest with himself, then yes, he felt scared. As stubborn as Emily was, she’d started to grow on him. He didn’t want anything to happen to her.

And he wasn’t ready to not be around her—at least for now. He’d been a loner his whole life, so he imagined he would die that way too. But for the time being, her star was hitched to his wagon—whether she liked it or not.

Judging by the way she carried on, at the moment she most definitely did not like it.

Even as she pounded his chest with her fists, getting blood on his shirt, he noticed how beautiful The Cloisters looked. His footsteps down the stone hallway were loud, echoing in the high, arched ceilings.

There was a garden in the middle of the building, in a courtyard of some sort. He carried her out into the chilly night air, setting her down at the edge of a stone fountain with a large cross on top of it.

She made no move to run away.

“I’m worried about you, Em,” he said. “Can I wash your face?”

She didn’t answer, but she didn’t say no.

He reached into his pocket and found a relatively clean handkerchief made out of a piece of an old T-shirt. Dipping it in the freezing-cold water, he tried to clean it a bit before getting it wet again and wiping it over her face carefully.

She winced. And she still wouldn’t look him in the eye.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “Do you want to do it?”

She shook her head. “I’d need a mirror. You do it. How bad is it?” As she asked, she reached up and carefully touched her face, lightly tapping along her face and around her eyes. “I don’t think I broke any bones, which is like a miracle. I’ll probably have one hell of a black eye, if I don’t already. Does it look awful?”

Mason was so happy she was talking to him again he forgot to lie to spare her feelings. “You look like you were attacked. Which you were.” Gently, he finished wiping off the last of the blood.

“Yeah.” She fell quiet again.

“I had to kill that man, Emily. I’m not a murderer. Well… it’s not like I do it for sport. It was self-defense. To protect you.”

“You couldn’t punch him out or something? Why shoot him?”

“He charged us. He’d already really hurt you, and I wasn’t about to take any chances. I’m sorry you feel I overreacted, but it was a split-second decision I had to make.”

She huffed. “An overreaction. So that’s what we’re calling murder these days? Nice.”

Mason shook his head. “I’m going to check the traps I set for food, and while I’m gone you need to hang on to your gun and stay put.”

“There’s a medieval garden here, you know,” she said, as if she hadn’t heard him. The fragile skin below her eye was already blossoming into a dark bruise. “I’ll find us something in case the traps don’t work out.”

He wanted her to stay put and stay safe, but he doubted she’d listen anyway. Sighing, he nodded. “I’ll meet you in the garden in twenty minutes. Don’t shoot me when I come in—wait till you see what you’re shooting at.”

As he walked away, he heard her grumble, “If I’m still here when you get back.”

Emily touched her face gingerly, wincing at the pain. Damn old man had come out of nowhere. It had been a terrifying experience, being pelted with rocks. She could have been stoned to death.

But when Mason shot the man . . . She shuddered, remembering the loud bang echoing through The Cloisters. What had she expected? Before the Pulse, he’d been locked up. A convicted murderer. Just because she was spending all this time with him, sleeping with him, didn’t change who he truly was. What was the old saying? A leopard couldn’t change its spots.

And now he had killed again, so easily. Emily held the damp cloth to her bruised eye. The cold wetness had already warmed against her body heat. She dipped it into the fountain once more, not bothering to wring it out. Instead, she let the rivulets of cool water drip down her face as she pressed the cloth to her face. Maybe she could ward off some of the swelling.

The pain in her face was nothing compared to the pain she felt inside, the stab of guilt she felt every time she thought about killing Andrews, no matter how much he deserved it. Why didn’t Mason feel the same way about the old man? Especially since the old man probably didn’t even deserve to die—not like Andrews did, anyway.

The image of Andrews on the floor, covered in blood, melded together in her mind with the image of the old man shot dead.

Pull yourself together, Emily.

For the time being at least, Mason wasn’t going anywhere. He made that perfectly clear. All that strength, all that power—he’d used it on her without a second thought, picking her up in his arms and carrying her around like a doll. Before the Pulse, men had respected the fact that she was smaller than them, and didn’t manhandle her just because they could. That wasn’t the case anymore. Her punches and kicks hadn’t deterred him a bit.

And that was scary as well.

Emily walked through The Cloisters to the medieval garden. She remembered it clearly from her childhood field trip, simply because the idea that weeds were grown on purpose and eaten interested her.

Now, the paved floor of the garden was cracked, weeds and plants growing up between the bricks, the garden completely chaotic and unkempt. Fortunately the plants were hardy, and most of them were edible. Emily started gathering the plants for a salad, the moonlight making the leaves in her hands seem to shimmer.

She couldn’t stay with Mason, not if he really was a cold-blooded killer.

But he protected you.

She nudged the little voice in the back of her mind away, trying to stay rational. If she let her feelings into this, she’d be lost. His broad shoulders, muscular chest, and incredible blue eyes made her go crazy with lust, true. And he made her come harder than she ever had before in her life.

Having him with her to protect her was what she wanted, though, right? Emily realized she had never stopped to really think about what that actually meant, just like she’d never stopped to think about what it actually meant to walk, on foot, out of New York.

With Mason as her bodyguard, people might die. People did die.

Could she live with that?

16

Mason walked carefully through the grounds outside The Cloisters, grateful for the moonlit night. He’d have to make a fire for them, both for warmth and to cook the squirrel he’d caught. It was a skinny little thing, but better than nothing.

“Emily?” he called, not wanting to startle her and wind up dead from a misplaced bullet. Although, the way Emily had been acting, he’d have to wonder if she wouldn’t try to shoot him on purpose. She seemed horrified he’d killed a man to protect her.

“Over here,” she replied. She came in from the garden, her shirt up, holding a whole bunch of what looked like weeds. Her flat white belly shone above her waistband, and his cock stirred. “I got enough for breakfast tomorrow too.”

He held up his skinny dead squirrel. “Great,” he said. “We can make stew. I’ll get a fire going. I walked through a beautiful chapel on the way here—we can sleep there tonight. I figure if we put stones around to keep the fire contained we can make a small one for warmth and cooking.”

Emily nodded, but she still seemed distant.

He had really scared her, it seemed. What could he do to reassure her?

Emily wouldn’t sit next to him by the fire. Mason skinned and boned the squirrel, and Emily put everything to boil with the plants in their pot. Well, it was his pot. He’d started to think of his things as belonging to her too.

“Emily, you’re being…” He trailed off. He wanted to say ridiculous. Or even crazy. But even he had enough wits to know when you want a woman to forgive you, the last thing you do is call her crazy.

“I think,” she said softly, the flames making shadows jump across her face, still beautiful despite the swollen cheekbone and black eye, “I think I’m in over my head.”

Mason looked at her. At least she was talking to him now. “What do you mean?”

“I didn’t think it through, what it meant when I asked you to come with me, to protect me. I didn’t think it through and now a man is dead.”

Now it was Mason’s turn to be silent.

“Actually,” she continued, “two men are dead. I killed Private Andrews, and you killed the old man. Before I met you—I never killed anyone. A whole year of living in the camp and I managed to refrain from becoming a cold-blooded killer. Within days of meeting you, a convicted murderer, I kill a man.”

“Hey,” Mason said in disbelief. “You can’t blame me for what you did.”

“Maybe,” Emily said, standing up, “you’re a bad influence on me. A dangerous influence.”

“That’s crazy,” he said vehemently, no longer caring if his words insulted her. He stood as well and she backed away from him. “You need to own up to your actions. You can’t blame me.”

He drew closer to her and she trembled. With anger, or with fear? “Emily,” he said darkly, pulling her toward him, “this is a new world we live in. Kill or be killed. You made the right choice, and so did I. I’d do it again in a heartbeat to keep you safe.”

She shoved against his chest, hard, pushing him back. Mason grabbed her wrists in his hand and held her still. Her face was inches away, her cheeks flushed.

“Why?” she asked, her voice raw. “Why do you want to keep me safe?”

“Because you asked me to.”

She lifted herself on her tiptoes then and pressed her lips against his, surprising him with her fiery passion. Wrapping his arms around her, he claimed her mouth, kissing her deeper, needing to feel her body on his.

He ripped his shirt off, the fire warming his naked flesh. Emily made no move to remove her clothes, so he reached down and pulled her shirt off for her. She gasped, her breasts bare, her nipples erect.

Mason pulled her pants down and they tangled around her legs, making her tumble to the floor, but she caught herself on her hands before she landed face-first.

Mason dropped to his knees behind her, pulling her hips and ass toward him, his cock hard in his pants. He quickly unzipped his fly, groaning as his cock hit the air, pre-come moistening the tip. Slipping his hand between Emily’s thighs, he ran his fingers across her folds, parting them, exposing her clit.

Emily bucked against his hand as he flicked her clit, keeping up a steady rhythm. He slid his fingers deep within her until she gasped, moaning, her pussy clenching around them. Mason slowly withdrew his hand and positioned himself behind her at the entrance to her wet cunt.

Grabbing hold of her hips, Mason plunged himself inside her, putting all of his fear of losing her into his thrusts, making her cry out as she came again, her slick channel pulsing convulsively around his cock.

She started to crawl forward but Mason wasn’t done. He took her tangled brown hair in his hand and held her in place, her back arching as he continued fucking her until he came, groaning, ejaculating deep inside her.

Emily lowered herself to the ground, gasping, her bruised cheek touching the cold marble floor. Mason lay next to her, running his fingers over her back, kneading the muscles.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered.

She looked at him, a small smile on her lips. “For what?”

“I didn’t mean to be so… rough.”

Emily chuckled. “I liked it, actually.”

Mason paused mid-massage, his fingers halfway up her back. “Are you still mad at me for killing that guy?”

As soon as he said it he wished he could take the words back. They’d been connecting there for a moment—and now she’d remember why she was so upset with him in the first place.

Emily didn’t answer. Instead, she rolled over onto her back, wrapping her arms around his neck, drawing him on top of her. He held his weight off of her by propping himself up onto his elbows, staring into her brown eyes.

When had she become so important to him? And what did that mean, for his own ability to survive independently?

Emily reached down between their bodies and grabbed hold of his cock, opening her knees wide so she was positioned perfectly beneath him. With a sweet gasp, she held his shaft in place and pressed her hips forward, drawing his cock inside her.

His erection stiffened as she writhed underneath him. He struggled to be slower this time, to take his time and make it last. Sliding deep into her pussy, he withdrew, letting his cock slide against her clit as he came out and then thrust back in again.

She gyrated her hips slowly, moving them in a full circle around his cock. It felt so incredible he never wanted it to end. Kissing her neck, licking a trail to her ear, he whispered, “That feels amazing.”

Her pussy clenched in response, and Mason couldn’t help but come as her muscles contracted over and over again, a sheen of perspiration covering her pale skin. He lowered himself onto her, breathing heavily.

Finally, after their breath had evened out and their heartbeats slowed to a more normal pace, Emily gently pushed him off of her.

“Come on,” she said. “We have to bury the body.”

Jenna walked slowly through the main concourse at Grand Central Terminal, taking in the scene around her. People were dirty and hungry, purple bags shadowing their eyes. The women who had men to look out for them weren’t expected to live on the Tracks—just the women who, like her, were alone. Maybe more of those families would have survived if those women’s husbands would’ve let them barter the last thing they had to share in exchange for food. Instead, there weren’t nearly as many women living in the main concourse as there were on the Tracks. There weren’t nearly as many women living.

People were already lining up for the dinner ration, a biscuit that was half sawdust and a watery stew made with, if Jenna’s sources were accurate, rat meat. Still, food was food.

She stood in line, wondering if she smelled and looked quite as bad as most of them did. There had been a lice breakout recently and many women, without mirrors, had cut their hair off and didn’t even seem to care.

Her scalp itched just thinking about it—but she didn’t dare scratch or somebody might get it into their head to “help” her by insisting she cut her hair too.

A petite girl with freshly shorn black hair stood in front of her in line. She turned around and said, “Are you Jenna?”

Uh-oh. She nodded, raising an eyebrow.

“I’m Taryn,” the girl said. She dropped her voice, looking around to see if anyone was listening. No one was. “I heard you were friends with the girl who iced Private Andrews.”

Jenna held back a gasp. She still refused to believe Emily would have done something like that. But then… who knew what really happened in that room? Maybe it was an accident.

Taryn apparently took Jenna’s silence as confirmation. “Good for her,” she whispered. “If I weren’t such a chicken, I’d do the same thing. I’d kill them all, the bastards.”

Jenna gulped. Maybe—maybe Emily had been pushed too far, like this girl Taryn must have been for her to be so full of hate.

“Um, don’t kill anyone,” Jenna said lamely. “I mean, is it really so bad?”

Taryn scoffed. “Maybe not for you. All the guys talk about how you like it. Just last night some creep told me he’d learned a great way to eat pussy and you’d already given him the thumbs-up. I mean, talk about sick.”

“What’s sick about that, exactly?” Jenna asked, confused.

“I don’t want to get off, I want to get fed,” Taryn said matter-of-factly. “The least amount of time I have to spend in the presence of those assholes is still too long for me.”

Jenna shrugged.

“I guess,” Taryn said, looking at her thoughtfully, “if you tell yourself you enjoy it, that it’s not really prostitution, or not really rape, then it’s easier to survive and live happily.”

Huh. Jenna didn’t respond.

“I’m a—well, I was,” she amended, “a psych major at NYU.”

“What would your psychology professors have to say about you wanting to kill the soldiers who visit you?” Jenna asked, genuinely curious.

Taryn huffed as though she’d been thoroughly insulted. Then, to Jenna’s surprise, tears welled up in the girl’s eyes. “I just want to go home. I hate it here.”

Maybe I should tell her about the radio. About the other communities. Give her some hope—so she didn’t wind up “icing” some soldier like she fantasized about. Jenna looked at the long dinner line in front of her and sighed.

“If I tell you something,” Jenna said, her voice low, “can you keep it on the down low?”

Taryn nodded, looking intrigued. “Who’m I gonna tell, anyway,” she said bitterly. “I have no friends here.”

“Emily sent me a message after she escaped—after she killed the soldier. She said the army here has a working radio, and the radio plays a station called American Victory Radio—and there are places outside the city that are rebuilding. Places that are doing better.”

Taryn smiled and shook her head. “No way. They would have told us.”

“And ruin having complete power over everyone?” she asked pointedly. “Colonel Lanche is a fucking dictator. You know that. He’s a sadist, too—you’d know that if you ever spent any time with him on the Tracks.”

From the way Taryn nodded, she had.

“Look, you don’t have to believe me. I just wanted to let you know, in case you wanted to leave Grand Central.” Jenna thought about that for a moment and said, “Not that I think that’s a particularly safe option. I’m saying it’s one option.”

Taryn smiled again, her whole face brightening. “You really think there are places in the US doing better than this hellhole?”

Jenna nodded. “Sure, why not? Imagine farming communities, or places where they could fish or something for food. If they had good leadership—I mean, yeah, they’d still have their problems—”

“No electricity, no cars, no trucks transporting supplies, no clean running water, no medications,” Taryn said, listing the issues off on her fingers. “So they probably lost a lot of people at first, like we did.”

Dejected, Jenna sighed. “Yeah, I guess you’re right.”

“But,” Taryn said, “with a good leader, it would have to be better than here.”

Jenna nodded at the girl. “Yeah, I imagine anything would be better than here.”

“If I decided to leave,” Taryn said, “would you come with me?”

Emily looked over at the corpse lying on the floor of The Cloisters and took a deep breath. As a nurse she should be used to seeing death and blood. But when she saw the old man’s body, she could only see Mason killing him. Shooting him down—to protect her.

“We have to wrap him in something,” she said.

“There’s nothing to wrap him in. I’ll just carry him,” Mason said, easily lifting the man’s body. He looked down at the man’s face and grimaced as if in pain. “I really wish he hadn’t attacked you.”

“Me too.”

“You don’t have to come with me,” Mason said. “I promise I’ll bury him properly. I’ll make sure no animals will be able to get at him.”

Emily winced at the thought. “No, I need to help. I’m the main reason he’s dead. You were protecting me.”

Mason didn’t respond. He walked, carrying the old man’s body, his shirt already covered in blood.

Out on the grounds Mason nodded toward an old shed and set the body down carefully. Emily followed and watched silently as Mason picked the lock with his knife and opened the door within a minute. He must’ve learned that skill in prison.

Mason reached in and grabbed two shovels and handed her one almost as tall as her.

“Over there,” he said, pointing to a grassy area. He broke the ground with a grunt of exertion, piercing the fresh spring grass, pulling up a shovelful of rich, soft soil. Emily joined him, grateful for the physical labor to take her mind off of what happened.

This is all my fault. That poor old man was dead because of her. He kept The Cloisters safe for all this time, and now he’s dead.

She dug harder, trying to force the thoughts from her mind. “Do you think he had family?” she asked, panting, beads of perspiration running down between her breasts as she continued to dig.

“Everyone has some sort of family,” Mason said. “But no. I imagine he probably worked here… the grounds man maybe… and he stayed on.”

“You shouldn’t have killed him.”

“Stop saying that, Em. I know you’re upset. And there’s only so many times and so many ways I can explain that I had to make this choice.”

“I know.” She lifted another shovelful of dirt out of the grave with a grunt. She did know—as upset as she was she could also see the truth in his words. “I’m sorry. You’re right—he could have killed me. He attacked me, and he could have attacked you too.”

Mason lifted two more shovelfuls of dirt out of the grave before responding. “So you forgive me?”

“Yes.” Emily lifted another shovelful of dirt. “I suppose I have to. Because if I didn’t, then I couldn’t keep asking you to protect me, knowing what that means. But I still need you. I still—I still want you to protect me, Mason. And I’m probably lucky to have someone around who knows what to do and isn’t afraid to do it.”

“I could say the same for you.”

They continued digging in silence, the only sounds the crickets chirping and their ragged breaths as the shovels hit the dirt.

“This is deep enough,” Mason said when they’d dug down a few feet. Emily stopped and nodded, her entire body aching from the exertion.

Mason pulled himself out of the hole and reached down, grabbing Emily under her arms and lifting her out. Her body pressed against his and she hugged him fiercely, a fresh wave of sobs shuddering through her.

“I’m so sorry,” she whispered. “I’m sorry this happened.”

Mason hugged her, stroking her hair. She felt herself calm down, just from his presence, from his touch.

“We have to bury him,” she said.

Mason lifted the old man’s body and set him into the grave. He shoveled dirt onto him quickly, and Emily noticed he wasn’t looking at the old man’s face. Surely that face would haunt him, just as it would haunt her.

When Mason finished he wiped his brow with his grimy hand and bowed his head. “God, please accept this man who protected The Cloisters into Heaven. And please forgive me for killing him.” He shook his head. “It sounds so terrible when I say it like that.”

“No,” Emily said. “It sounds right. Thank you for saying a prayer for him.”

Mason nodded. They left the shovels over the grave, crossed.

“Let’s go clean off in the Hudson River,” he suggested.

Clean. Yes, that’s exactly what she needed. Water to wash away the blood and the dirt and the pain. She held Mason’s hand as they walked down toward the riverbed.

Neither of them bothered to strip out of their clothes, since their clothes were filthy from the soil. The shock of the freezing-cold water cold pushed all thoughts of guilt and shame from Emily’s mind and she forced herself to endure the punishing temperature of the river, imagining it as penance that might wash away her sins.

Emily woke up the next morning at The Cloisters feeling like she’d gone a few rounds with a boxer. Getting pelted with rocks the night before might have had something to do with it, but Emily knew from her aching muscles that her pain came from digging the grave.

Mason slept, snoring lightly, his arm over his eyes to block the sunlight streaming through the beautiful stained-glass windows of the chapel.

Emily warmed the leftover stew they had eaten last night for dinner. It might be the only meal they ate all day if their luck didn’t improve. Now that they were at the very northern tip of Manhattan, though, they’d be out of the city soon. Mason had suggested they go across the George Washington Bridge into New Jersey, but Emily felt strongly that upstate New York would be a safer bet. She didn’t want to cross a bridge and end up in another congested crime-ridden city under martial law. If they kept going upstate, they might find some land and some semblance of freedom.

Mason took her views seriously, to her surprise. Maybe she really did have something to contribute to their partnership. She needed him, true, but she was beginning to see how he might need her as well.

Emily still wasn’t okay with the fact that Mason had killed that man—but she understood his intentions were good, at least. He wanted to protect her.

But what about the fact that she was turning into a person who not only condoned him killing a man, but killed a man herself?

His words came back to her—she had to hold herself accountable for her own actions. It was true, as much as she didn’t want it to be. It wasn’t Mason’s fault she was on the run now as a murderer. It was hers. And when she thought about, she knew she’d make the same decision again if she had to.

So what did that say about her?

She was changing as a person, definitely. But maybe it wasn’t for the worse. Maybe being able to take care of herself was a step in the right direction. She’d proven that she didn’t have to be a victim of circumstance. She could take charge and do whatever was necessary to survive, despite living through hell on the Tracks.

If Emily hadn’t killed Private Andrews, she’d be dead right now. And if Mason hadn’t killed that man last night… who knows what would have happened. Her cheek ached where the rock had hit it. The old man had been charging toward them, ready to attack. It could have been worse. Much, much worse.

But still—the look in Mason’s eyes as he hefted that rifle and shot the man down—it had been terrifying. He was pure aggressor, pure hunter. What if that aggression ever got turned around onto her? Would she ever have to look down the barrel of that rifle herself?

Don’t be ridiculous, she chided herself. That would never happen. Everything that’s happened has been for you, never against you.

Although he had been aggressive last night, when they made love. Her face felt warm and she knew she was blushing—because she had enjoyed that. A lot.

As if he could read her mind, Mason stirred in his sleep, then opened his eyes and looked at her. “Good morning,” Mason said sleepily, sitting up and rubbing his eyes. She handed him a mug of the squirrel-and-weed stew. “Thanks.” He blew on it for a second before taking a sip.

“We should get on the road soon,” she said. “When you’re done.”

He nodded. “I’ve been thinking. This time of year, we might not have to go very far upstate before finding actual wildlife, maybe some deer.”

The thought of eating a slab of venison, though she’d never actually done that before, appealed to her so much that saliva filled her mouth and she swallowed, smiling. “How far do you think we’ll be walking?”

“For a few days, I imagine, at least. It’s a good thing it’s getting warmer because we may end up sleeping outside.”

Less than half an hour later they had cleaned up after themselves at The Cloisters and were back on the road. Before they left Emily stuffed her pack with more plants from the medieval garden.

Mason checked his traps but when they came up empty he pulled the traps apart. He said he didn’t want to accidentally trap an animal and then leave it to die with no one there to eat it.

See, he’s not all bad, she thought. Even though it was a small thing, disabling the traps, it made her feel a bit better knowing he cared about the animals.

The walk became more beautiful the farther from Manhattan they got, and they fell into a companionable silence as they continued on their way. Mason said they were probably walking at a comfortable pace of three miles an hour, which meant after an entire day of walking they weren’t nearly as far as she wished they could be.

“We need a car,” she said.

“I know,” Mason agreed. “But I don’t see how that’s going to happen.”

They had passed numerous dead cars on their way, every one of which had stalled the moment the Pulse hit, never to be driven again. Emily was tired and hungry and her entire body hurt.

They kept walking.

Suddenly, after hours and hours of monotony, Mason inhaled sharply and pulled Emily to the ground.

“What is it?” she asked fearfully.

“The road,” he whispered. “It’s barricaded up ahead. Look.”

17

EMILY looked up ahead on Highway 87 North. Sure enough, a bunch of cars pushed together blocked their way. Two men with rifles, the sunlight glinting off of the metal, stood guard at the barricade.

“Oh my God.” Emily turned to Mason in terror. “What do we do?”

“We’ll have to go talk to them, I imagine.”

She shook her head vehemently. “Why? Why start trouble?”

“If we try to skirt around the barricade, that’s trouble. If we go talk to them, maybe they’ll let us past.”

“Or maybe,” Emily said, grabbing his arm, “they’ll make us turn back. We just got out of the city, I can’t turn back. I can’t.”

“Or maybe they’ll shoot us and take our stuff,” Mason said.

“Are you serious?”

“I’m trying to think of all the possibilities.” Mason sighed, standing up. “Look,” he said, putting his large hand out for her to grab, pulling her to standing. “Either we change routes and risk never finding another community, or worse, dying out in the middle of nowhere, or we talk to those soldiers. Just—don’t use our real names.”

“Obviously.” Emily shook her head. They were both wanted murderers. Did he think she had forgotten?

“What if they see your gun and shoot first and ask questions later?” she asked as they walked slowly forward.

“Then I’d want you to put your hands in the air, wait for them to be distracted, then kill them,” he said calmly.

Emily gasped. “I don’t want to do this—please, Mason, let’s change direction.”

“Please, Em, trust me on this. We have to confront them. It’s the only way.”

“I trust you.”

Mason walked ahead of her, straight toward the barricade.

Mason felt a shiver of fear run down his spine as they approached the two armed soldiers at the barricade. He lifted his arms in the air to show he wasn’t a threat while still a good quarter mile away. Emily, seeing him, did the same.

“It’s not too late to go a different way,” Emily said out of the side of her mouth.

“We’ll be okay, Em,” he said. But he was ready to fight in case that wasn’t true. He didn’t like the odds—two trained, armed men against him and Emily—but then again, both he and Emily had killed to protect themselves before. He wondered if those guards at the barricade had as well.

“Pretend we’re married,” he whispered.

“Now who’s getting ahead of himself?” she muttered, surprising him with her show of humor even when she was obviously scared to death. Then, “What name should we use?”

They continued walking slowly forward with their hands in the air.

“Harris,” Mason said. “I can be Mason Harris instead of Christopher Mason, that way if you slip up and call me Mason it won’t seem strange. In fact, it won’t be a slipup at all.”

“What about me?”

“Emily Harris, I guess,” he said, shrugging. “Emily is a really common name, so it shouldn’t raise any eyebrows.”

“Where’d you get the name Harris?” Emily asked.

“Mom’s maiden name. Just don’t forget, okay?”

Emily nodded. They reached the barricade of cars set up across the highway.

“Drop your weapons on the pavement and take two large steps backward,” one guard ordered.

Mason kept his hands in the air, but he hesitated. “Sir, I don’t want you to take our weapons. We aren’t a threat.”

“I don’t ask twice, soldier,” the guard said, and Mason realized the guard thought Mason was a soldier as well. Of course.

Mason set his rifle on the ground, but kept his pistol in the small of his back, hidden under his shirt. Emily did the same with her weapon.

“State your business,” the guard said.

Mason didn’t like the way he eyed Emily. Seeing her through a stranger’s eyes, Mason noticed how her sweatshirt tied around her waist accentuated the feminine curve of her hips. Her T-shirt was fitted and ripped across her shoulder, showing a tantalizing flash of skin.

“Just passing through,” Mason said. “Although if there’s a town nearby where we could spend the night we’d be much obliged.”

“That’s what we’re here to keep from happening,” the other guard said. “We can’t take care of every traveler who passes through here, wanting to stay. You have two hours to get to the other side of town and pass the barricade on the other side.” He patted his radio on his belt, to show he could let the other side know to expect Mason and Emily soon.

Emily looked at him in surprise. “Your walkie-talkies—they work?”

The guard smiled at her. “Yup.” He didn’t say another word about it.

Mason supposed they had a survivalist in the town who had kept some stuff in a homemade Faraday cage prior to the Pulse. He wished he had had the foresight to do something like that. A hand-crank radio, some walkie-talkies—that would’ve been more than enough. Hindsight, however, was twenty-twenty.

The guard stared at Emily’s bruised cheek with interest, then looked pointedly at Mason. “Was she backtalking, or what?” He laughed as if he had just told a great joke.

Mason didn’t answer.

The other guard coughed and nodded. Some sort of secret communication took place between the two soldiers. “There is one way you could get some food, though,” he said, talking to Mason.

“What’s that?” he asked, already fearing he knew the answer.

“We’d need twenty minutes alone with your girl there.”

Emily looked at Mason, her eyebrows furrowed in concern, as if he’d actually consider such a thing.

“No,” Mason said, trying to keep the hate out of his tone. “We want to pass through.”

Please, he prayed, please don’t let there be trouble.

“Suit yourself,” the guard said. “Be out the other side in exactly two hours. You’ll have to walk fast to make it on time.”

Emily nodded, not looking at the men, her cheeks bright red. Mason leaned down slowly to pick up his rifle. How many couples, he wondered, were hungry enough to take those guys up on their offer?

If Emily had been traveling alone, would she even have the option to refuse? Somehow he doubted it. With no consequences for breaking the law, fewer and fewer people cared to follow the rules. The mass looting and riots that broke out shortly after the Pulse first hit were testament to that. The people who’d made it this long were those who were willing to do whatever it took to survive—including breaking the laws of a society that no longer existed.

Walking past the barricade, Mason took Emily’s hand to comfort her. It seemed so tiny and cold in his. The barricade was right before an exit to a town—the town the men were protecting. Mason wondered how they were faring.

Had to be better than in Grand Central.

They kept walking until they hit the other barricade. Sure enough, the other soldiers nodded in recognition and waved them through. Back on the open road.

“We need to figure out a way to get people to let us spend the night,” Emily said decisively. “Let me talk next time.”

“You’re going to talk yourself right into being raped,” Mason said. At her shocked expression, he shook his head. “I’m sorry. I just—I worry about you. About how the men look at you. I don’t want anything bad to happen.”

She nodded. “Thank you. Just don’t forget the last guy who tried something is now dead. I can handle myself, okay?”

They kept walking. Emily pulled some of the plants out of her pack and shared them with Mason. “It’s like we’re eating salad. To go.”

Mason laughed. “I’d prefer a Big Mac.”

Emily nodded. “Before the Pulse, I would have disagreed. But now, I’d seriously consider that paradise.”

Then she brightened, looking at Mason. “You know what they need?” she asked, walking faster up the highway. “Nurses, I bet. Everyone needs nurses. If they have sick or injured people, they might want someone to take a look. Maybe help.”

It wasn’t a bad idea.

They kept walking until Mason felt his leg muscles starting to cramp and he knew Emily must be feeling even worse. “We have to stop for the night, I suppose,” he said.

Emily didn’t respond right away. It was like she’d drifted into her own dreamland, dazed, walking without thinking so that she didn’t have to be aware of her physical body.

“Em?”

“What? Yes, Let’s stop.” She nearly crumpled right there along the side of the highway.

Taking her hand, he led her to a stalled SUV. “This one looks roomy. We can sleep in the back.”

Emily nodded and they climbed in. Whoever had owned this SUV must have had children. Emily immediately closed her eyes and started to doze, but Mason searched in the deep pockets behind the front bucket seats, and then under the seats in the back. If there were young kids, then the mom must have packed snacks, right? That’s what moms did. And kids, well—dropped things.

Mason fished a half-eaten bag of Doritos out from under the seat and whooped.

“These things are probably still good,” he said, handing her some. The taste of year-old stale chips filled his mouth and he relished it. “I’m going to look in the back of the truck,” he said.

Emily nodded, her mouth full, as she rolled her tongue around the little chip in her mouth. “Yum.”

Climbing over the back seat, Mason tore through the junk back there, all things the family had apparently abandoned. Or maybe, he mused, maybe it was just the mom, driving home to relieve the babysitter, when the Pulse happened. And she left the car and started walking, not realizing the things in her car might be helpful later.

They were far enough out in the middle of the highway, between towns, that no one had scavenged the cars out there.

And then, Mason saw the last setting rays of the sun glint off something glass. A jar of peanuts.

Really?

Mason had to hold it in his hand to see if it was true, if he was dreaming. An entire jar of shelled honey-roasted peanuts. He tamped down his first instinct to open it and shove the peanuts into his mouth and climbed into the back seat instead. Emily was still savoring a piece of stale Dorito.

“Are you hungry?” he asked, a smile on his face.

She laughed as if to say always.

“How would you like some peanuts?” He brandished the jar, and she stared at it in silent confusion for a second.

“Did you find these in the back of the SUV?” she asked.

“Yup. They were hidden from sight. So—they’re a year old, but they’re all ours.”

Worry creased Emily’s brow and Mason’s pulse spiked in sudden concern.

“Wait,” he said, “you’re not allergic to nuts or something, are you?”

“No, it’s not that. I’m thrilled about the nuts, I just—I wonder what might have happened to that mom. And her kids. If she ever found them again, and if she did—if they… If they lived.”

Mason stilled. He couldn’t focus on that, it was too painful. If he focused on that, he’d have to start thinking about his sister Stephanie, and wondering if she was okay out in Los Angeles. Wonder if he’d ever find out. If he thought about all the people who had died, he wouldn’t be able to focus on the fact that he had lived.

He emptied a few peanuts into his hand and handed them to Emily, who tentatively took only one, like he had, and ate it. “Oh my God,” she said. “Delicious.”

“And tons of protein too. These nuts were a jackpot.”

“I’d rather find a bunch of food than a million dollars at this point,” she mused.

“Of course. What’s paper money good for now, anyway? Other than as toilet paper?”

Emily laughed and they crunched more nuts. “Let’s save these for tomorrow. They’re portable and we don’t know what the food situation will be like.”

“The next time we come across a town,” Mason said, “you should talk. I think your idea about telling them how you’re a nurse might work, actually.”

Emily smiled. She looked sleepy but so beautiful, even with the dust from the road covering her and the black eye. At least her eye wasn’t swollen shut. He shuddered when he recalled that the guys at the barricade thought he had hit her.

“I’m so tired,” she whispered, but even as she said that, she sat on his lap in the back seat of the SUV.

Mason groaned and his cock hardened as she wiggled on his lap as if to get more comfortable. He gasped as she rubbed against him with her movements.

“I like sitting on your lap,” she said, shifting her weight, “but it’s a bit uncomfortable with that huge thing in your pants, poking me.” She writhed more, as if to prove her point.

“What thing?” he joked. Then she shifted again and he gasped. “I hope you weren’t planning on going to sleep anytime soon,” he warned.

“I was,” she said. “Why? Did you have other things in mind?”

He didn’t respond, just reached around between her legs and held her groin, over her jeans. As she wiggled on his lap, he kept his hand firm in place, making her rub herself against his grasp. Soon her movements brought him to a near orgasm, and he could tell from her breathing she was close too.

“Please,” she said. “Take my pants off.”

He shook his head and kept rubbing her over her jeans. “You said you were tired,” he reminded her. “So we’re not going to have sex tonight. I don’t want to tire you out. We’ll just sit here, with you on my lap.” As he spoke he squeezed between her legs tighter and she trembled.

“Come on,” she moaned, bucking against his hand. He was so hard it hurt. Finally, he groaned and unzipped her jeans, sliding his hands over her wet pussy, running his thumb over her swollen clit. He pinched it gently, rhythmically, over and over and she came, gasping for air.

“Oh please,” she breathed, even though he wasn’t sure what she was asking for. He kept rubbing her, overstimulating her swollen clit until he heard her breathing quicken again and she climaxed once more, covering his fingers with her come.

Her second orgasm was too much for him to watch without taking her. Unzipping his pants, he freed his cock, so hard it was nearly purple, and held her tightly on his lap as he slid inside her, thrusting his hips up and down, holding her impaled on his cock. She leaned forward for leverage and bounced, raising and lowering her hips to meet his thrusts, until he burst inside her, coming hard. Resting his forehead on her back, he breathed slowly until he felt calm and relaxed. His cock slid out of her wet pussy and he helped her pull her pants back up before pulling up his own.

“Now,” he said, grinning, “we can sleep.”

The sun had set at some point during their lovemaking, and Mason was grateful for the moonlight, the only light out there on the abandoned highway. Hopefully the men who were interested in fucking Emily weren’t interested enough to come hunt them down.

He slept holding his pistol in his hand.

18

THE FOLLOWING morning, Emily and Mason got up early, dined on leftover plants and nuts, and started walking again up I-87 North.

Emily had a blister forming on her right foot, so she padded her sock with a piece of cotton from the SUV’s seat cushion, which helped quite a bit. They had been walking for hours when Mason gestured up ahead.

Two armed men.

They weren’t soldiers, it looked like. From what she could see at this distance, they were wearing street clothes but carrying old-fashioned shotguns. Definitely no match for Mason’s M16, but frightening nonetheless.

“There must be another town here,” she said quietly, even though the men were probably still half a mile away. “Why don’t they have a barricade of cars, like the other place did?” she wondered out loud.

Mason shrugged. “Let’s try to convince them to let us spend the night at the town, get a meal, maybe, in exchange for work.”

“You think they might need a nurse?”

“Maybe. If not, I can do manual labor stuff, no problem.”

“God, I hope so.”

They put their hands in the air again as they approached the two men guarding the road. “Hi there,” Emily said brightly. “I’m Emily… Harris. This is my husband, Mason.”

“Call me Luke,” the guard said. Emily guessed they must not see a lot of travelers to speak to them in such a friendly way. Or maybe because a woman approached them instead of a man. “You can put your hands down, Mrs. Harris. Long as your hubby don’t plan on shooting us.”

“ ’Course not,” Mason said, lowering his hands slowly.

“You can go on through, but don’t stop in the town,” Luke said. “We don’t have anything extra to spare, we’re just making do with our own townsfolk.”

“What town is it, anyway?” Mason asked.

“Potterskill.”

“Anybody sick, or hurt?” Emily asked. She’d never heard of Potterskill, not that she would have, living in Manhattan.

The two men looked at each other. “My wife, actually. She just had a baby.” Luke said. “Why?”

“I’m an RN. And congratulations on your new baby. I can assess your wife, see if I can help. In exchange, my husband and I get a meal and a place to sleep tonight. And then we’ll go.”

“Done.” The other guard nodded to Luke and said, “Why don’t you escort them into town, introduce them to Melissa.”

Emily assumed Melissa was Luke’s wife.

They followed Luke down the off-ramp of the highway, turning left at the bottom of a short hill into a small town. They walked down what appeared to be the town’s main street. All of the stores were closed for business, and appeared to have been for a long time.

“We lost a lot of people within the first two months,” Luke said. “We had a nursing home with over a hundred fifty residents on the edge of town, and they all died very quickly without medications, electricity, clean running water, and people to help them. A lot of them just lay in bed, and when there wasn’t enough help to turn them and change their diapers and whatnot, they got horrible bedsores.”

“And then the bedsores got infected, and they died,” Emily finished.

“Yeah.” Luke got quiet, and she wondered if one of the patients who died was a family member.

“Do you mind if we see my wife Melissa first, before you eat?” Luke asked. “She’s been in terrible pain for the past few days. She looks awful. She can’t even hold the baby to nurse. I have to hold him to her breast so he can eat.”

“Of course—” Emily said, but Mason cut her off.

“Emily is hungry,” Mason said. “If she doesn’t eat she won’t have the strength to do her job.”

Luke nodded. “I understand.”

Emily sighed. She was hungry, but then again, she was always hungry. She was getting used to it.

Luke said, “I have food at my house. Beef and corn stew. And Melissa is at my house too.”

Emily salivated at the mention of beef and corn stew. She hadn’t eaten beef in months and months. Mason, she could see, had picked up his pace too, eager to get to Luke’s house.

They followed him down a street lined with trees and small ranch-style houses. All of the front yards had been turned into vegetable gardens. Emily wondered how the crops the military worked on in Central Park were doing. She’d never seen anything growing since they guarded the Park so heavily. If only people in the city had access to their own land to grow food like these people do, she thought wistfully.

Luke led them into a small house. Emily could smell the food and her stomach grumbled. He brought them into the kitchen, gesturing toward a small Formica table. Mason sat down. Emily wanted to find Melissa, to see what was wrong, but the smell of the stew proved too much.

She sat, her mouth watering in earnest now. In a back room somewhere a baby cried, and a woman’s voice shushed him halfheartedly.

“Hang on,” Luke said. “Let me make more.” He reached into the pot of stew on the counter and pulled out some small chunks of meat, and taking a knife off the cutting block, sliced the meat into tinier pieces before throwing them back in. “If I add a few more cups of water to the broth it’ll extend what I have to share,” he said. “I just need to boil it in the fireplace.”

Mason nodded, although Emily could tell it took all of his willpower to sit there calmly with food so close in sight.

She stood up. “Well, while you’re boiling the water, I’ll go check on Melissa and the baby. Mason, why don’t you come with me?”

Mason stood slowly, his eyes still on the stew. “You’ll let us know when it’s ready?” he asked.

Luke nodded. Then, to Emily, “She’s in the back room.”

Emily walked to the back of the house, with Mason close behind. She knocked and opened the door. It was dark inside, and stuffy.

“Hi, Melissa,” Emily said softly.

Walking to the window, she pulled open the drapes and let sunlight stream into the tiny bedroom. Melissa, a woman of about thirty, lay on the bed, curled in a ball, groaning. The baby lay next to her on the bed, crying again.

Mason stood by the doorway, clearly uncomfortable.

Emily stepped to the side of the bed. “Melissa?” she said. “I’m Emily, a friend of Luke’s. I’m a nurse. Do you have any pain?” Emily could tell she had pain, of course, but she wanted to see Melissa’s ability to respond. She was grateful Luke gave them some privacy, because often helpful family members impeded her assessment.

The woman looked up at her. “It’s awful. I can’t pee. For days, I think. It started soon after Percy was born. Terrible, terrible pain.”

Emily looked at the woman’s grossly distended abdomen. “Mason, give us a minute,” she said. He turned and stepped outside quickly, seemingly grateful to be dismissed.

Pressing her hand lightly on the woman’s bladder, she could feel it was overly full. “Has this ever happened to you before?” Emily asked.

“No. Never.” She gasped as Emily pressed on her bladder to see if she could help her pass urine. No luck.

“I need to catheterize you, and then you’ll be good as new,” she said. “I’m going to talk to Luke and see what I can get in terms of medical supplies.”

“The nursing home,” the woman said weakly. “Tell him to let you into the supply room at the nursing home.”

Just then, Luke called from the kitchen, “Stew’s ready!”

“Do you want some food?” Emily asked Melissa. The woman shook her head. “I can’t eat now. Haven’t eaten in two days.”

Picking up the baby, Emily quickly looked him over. He seemed fine, thank goodness. She swaddled him tightly, calming him, and set him back next to his mother.

Emily went out to the kitchen and said to Luke, “Can you put mine in a mug? We need to walk to the nursing home and pick up some urinary catheters.”

“So you can help her?” Luke asked, pouring generous helpings of the stew into two mugs. He looked visibly relieved when Emily nodded, all of her attention now on the mug filled with steaming beef stew.

“You have to come with us,” he said to Mason. “No offense. I don’t know you, and I can’t have you alone in my house with my wife and baby.”

Mason nodded. “I understand your concern. That’s fine.” He took the mug and sipped carefully. “Thank you. We’re—very grateful.”

Emily took a long gulp, relishing the taste of real beef. Not rat. Not rotten who-the-hell-knew-what. “Let’s walk and talk.”

They set out, walking to the edge of town. The stew revived her, and her footsteps were lighter. “How do you have beef, Luke?” she asked.

“Can’t tell you that.”

Mason looked at her and she shrugged. “Okay.” Maybe they had a secret cattle farm somewhere nearby.

“I will tell you, though, that the reason we have enough food to feed our residents now is because so many died over the winter,” Luke said quietly. “Fewer mouths to feed.”

“You should start planning now for next winter. Start storing food. Stockpiling,” Mason said. “I could help.”

“We have plenty of young, strong men,” Luke said. “Because that’s mainly who survived. Emily though—Emily is a rarity. A nurse, and a young woman.”

“She’s my wife,” Mason said tightly, through gritted teeth.

Emily fought the urge to laugh at his territoriality. Why did he keep up the act? She didn’t think of Luke as any sort of threat. He seemed just grateful that she was helping his wife.

Luke nodded thoughtfully. “I know. Just saying.” He turned to the large brick building. “This is the—well, was the nursing home. We don’t use it now. Too many bad memories. Ghosts too, some people say.”

Mason scoffed and Emily swatted his arm discreetly. “I see.”

They went up the ramp to the front door. The place had a stale odor to it.

“It used to be a million times worse. Finally we cleaned it out because some people were really worried we’d start, like, growing the plague in here. Or something. It was that bad.”

Emily could only imagine. If it smelled anything like that psychiatric hospital… She shuddered. “Where’s the supply room?” she asked, getting back to the task at hand.

Luke let them down the hall, and down a stairwell to the basement. “In here,” he said.

Emily looked around in wonder. The place was packed with various supplies. There were plenty of trach and vent supplies, she supposed because those patients had died off so quickly they never had use for them again. Same thing with urinary supplies and Foley catheters. She went to the shelf with the catheters and grabbed a whole bunch. This should do.

“These are sterile,” she said, “but I’ll teach you how you can clean them to be reused if it comes to that.”

Luke looked at the thin rubber tubes in her hands skeptically. “I don’t know how to do that.”

“You can watch me.”

She looked around for anything else she might be able to use. All the dressings, wound gels, and saline were gone. Used up. The containers of liquid nutrition meant for patients with gastric tubes were, of course, gone.

“We had to raid the supplies,” he said sadly. “We really did try to keep those folks going. We really did. But…” He trailed off. Emily nodded sympathetically.

Mason looked ready to get out of there. “Anything you need me to carry?” he asked. Emily looked around, her gaze landing on a pink plastic bedpan.

“Can you reach that bedpan for me? I don’t think I’ll be able to get Melissa to a toilet.” Then she stopped. “Not like we have working toilets.”

Luke laughed and Mason grabbed the bedpan. “Maybe I should get another for us to use, like a chamber pot.”

“Probably a good idea,” Luke said. “I doubt Emily here will want to walk outside to the outhouse by herself in the middle of the night.”

Emily looked at Mason, she could see his jawline clench. She could tell he didn’t like how easily Luke talked to her. Or about her.

“I’m ready, then,” she said, and they started walking back up the stairs.

The sunlight hit them, making them squint after the dark of the nursing home interior. They walked back to Luke’s house silently. Emily was planning in her head how she’d take care of Melissa. She hoped it was a temporary problem which would get better. If not, Melissa would almost surely end up with a bladder infection, if she didn’t have one already. And then she’d be in a whole shitload of trouble, since without antibiotics the infection could travel to her kidneys and do major damage. She’d probably end up dead.

They hurried the rest of the way back to Luke’s house as Emily picked up her pace, needing to see her patient.

“Melissa?” she called as they entered the house. Emily could hear her groaning in the back room. “Luke, come with me. You should learn how to do this.”

They all went in to the back bedroom and Emily grabbed the plastic bedpan from Mason along with one of the long yellow urinary catheters, still wrapped in its sterile covering. “Can you take off your pants, hon?” she asked Melissa. Luke looked uncomfortable at her request.

Luke turned to Mason. “Get out.” Mason left without a word, but Emily knew he’d stay close in case she needed him.

“Um, it’s going to get much worse than that, just to give you a heads-up,” Emily whispered to him. “But you should still be here. She’s in too much pain to mind at this point.”

Luke nodded. Melissa was on the bed, not being much help with removing her pants. Emily stepped in and helped her, lowering her pants and dirty underwear until they were completely off.

“Have you ever been catheterized before, Melissa?” she asked.

Luke answered for her. “Nope.”

“Okay, then, open your legs wide.” Within moments a stream of urine flowed from the tube into the bedpan.

“Oh my heavens,” Melissa said as her bladder emptied. “Finally!”

When she finished, Emily carefully withdrew the catheter and handed it to Luke. “Wash this, and keep it very clean. If this happens again, use a sterile catheter, but again wash it and keep it. If it becomes something she needs all the time you’ll be glad you have a collection of them.”

Luke nodded, looking queasy. “Thank you so much, Emily. For helping her.”

“Don’t you guys have any nurses? Or doctors?”

Melissa answered, sitting up in bed, the pain that had previously creased her face gone now. “They all died months ago from taking care of everyone who got sick.”

Emily gasped. “What was going around?”

“We’re not sure. Maybe a virus. It was… really bad. Really, really bad. We basically holed up here and wouldn’t leave the house for fear of catching it. But the nurses, they all stepped up.”

Mason apparently had been listening from the doorway. “And now they’re dead.”

Emily turned and frowned at him. “Mason,” she said quietly.

“Emily, I need to talk with you,” Mason said, pulling her arm.

She furrowed her brow and followed him into the hall. What was going on with him? “What, Mason?”

“That could be you. If you take care of every sick person we come across, what’s to keep you from getting sick too?”

Emily laughed. “You can’t catch urinary retention.”

Mason shook his head. “You know what I mean. Come on, you did your part.”

She sighed. “Okay, but I like helping people, you know. I like using my skills. It’s better than selling myself,” she said pointedly.

“Don’t even go there.”

“I worry about the girls back at Grand Central,” she said softly. “I wish they all could get out of there.”

“I told Jenna, and there’s not much else I can do,” Mason said.

“Part of me wishes you had made her leave with you.”

“I can’t take care of another person, Emily,” he said. Emily looked back through the doorway at Melissa, finally holding her baby again. The baby sucked her full breast hungrily, and Melissa looked so happy, even in these crazy times.

What if Emily were to get pregnant? She wondered if Mason would be angry. He probably would be, since he always talked about how he couldn’t take care of anyone but himself, and now her. But she didn’t need him to take care of her—they could take care of each other.

“Mason,” she said, suddenly needing to have him close, pulling him in to her for a hug. He wrapped his arms around her, a surprised look on his face.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “I hate the idea of you getting sick because you’re trying to help all these other people.”

“I know.”

Mason peered back into the bedroom. “Luke?”

Luke looked up from his wife and child and raised an eyebrow.

“Can you show us where we can sleep tonight? We’ve been walking all day and I think Emily needs to lie down,” Mason said.

Luke nodded. “She can’t talk for herself?” he asked under his breath.

Emily stiffened at his words. Of course she could talk for herself, but she didn’t usually think of her own needs first. Mason, it seemed, did.

Maybe she needed to ask Mason to stop talking for her so she’d remember to speak up for herself. But she had to admit she loved having him watch out for her. It made her feel safe.

Mason didn’t respond to Luke’s muttered comment. She could tell by Mason’s silence he was annoyed, but he wasn’t about to start a fight with someone who gave them beef stew and a place to sleep.

Luke led them to a guest bedroom with a queen-sized bed. “You folks can fit on there, even though it’s a bit small for two.”

“No,” Emily said, “it’s perfect. Thank you so much. I haven’t slept in a bed in a while.” She smiled at him and he laughed.

“Good,” Luke said. “I’m glad. Thanks again for helping Melissa. I was really worried about her.”

“I’ll go in and check on her again later,” Emily said.

“Hey,” Mason said. “That wasn’t part of the deal.”

“It’s not about the deal,” she whispered. “I want to make sure she’s okay. And you need to let me make some of my own decisions.”

Mason bristled at this. “Fine.”

The bed looked inviting, and she really was exhausted. But she felt better than she had in ages with her full belly and the endorphin rush from successfully treating Melissa—and, if she was honest with herself, from holding the baby. She shook her head. How could she bring up a baby in this world? It was a terrible idea, and not something she needed to think about anytime soon.

“You did a really good job in there,” Mason said, coming up behind her, his large hands on her tight shoulders. He rubbed her back and shoulders, his thumbs moving his circles over her shoulder blades, releasing the tension she’d been carrying all day. “Lie down,” he said, and she crawled onto the bed, lying on her stomach so he had more access to her back.

19

Mason carefully closed the door to the guest room behind him, locking the little eye-hook to prevent any unwanted intrusions. The sight of Emily lying prone on the bed gave him a rush of desire. He wanted to rip her pants off and ravish her from behind right then and there, but he’d take his time instead.

Sidling up next to her on the bed, he slowly pulled her shirt up over her head, removing it carefully. Running his fingers over her naked back, he climbed on top of her, straddling her thighs, holding himself up on his knees.

A moan escaped her lips as he massaged her, running his palms over the muscles next to her spine. She was so thin all of her ribs showed, and he wished he had enough food to fatten her up a bit.

Someday, hopefully. Maybe if they could find a little bit of land, breed something better than rats. He still couldn’t even imagine a cattle farm. How much food did it take to feed a cow? He’d have to find out. His daydream cut off swiftly when he looked down and realized the woman who inspired these thoughts of a better life was here with him on the bed. And for now at least, she was all his.

“Mason?” she murmured when his fingers stopped for a moment.

He shushed her and went back to gently kneading her muscles, and then he rolled her over onto her back.

She giggled. “You gonna massage me like this, too?”

He nodded, rubbing her arms, all the way up to her underarms and pecs, releasing the tension there that made her hunch her shoulders forward when she sat, exhausted.

“Oh, that is nice,” she whispered, closing her eyes.

He smiled and began using his fingertips to rub little circles over her breasts, lightly touching her areolas and nipples. The pink tips of her breasts immediately hardened as he touched them and she sighed.

He couldn’t wait any longer. Latching his mouth on one of her hard peaks, she moaned so loudly he was nervous Luke and Melissa would hear them. He raised his hand up to her mouth, playfully covering it. She nibbled his fingers and he bit her nipple in response, her cry muffled under his hand.

Emily laughed and pushed his hand away, sitting up in the bed. “Hey, you’re still dressed,” she said.

“Oops.” He pulled his shirt off over his head and tossed it on the floor. It was incredible how much better the world looked with a meal in his stomach and a beautiful woman in his bed. After walking all day, and after seeing the disturbing abandoned nursing home, he was glad to be where he was.

“I like it here,” Emily said, pressing herself against him.

“Don’t get too comfortable,” he said. “I don’t like what Luke said about young women like you being a rarity. You don’t want to end up stuck here as some random guy’s wife, pregnant with his baby.”

She shook her head, but she looked at him strangely. “Why would I be some random guy’s wife? Where are you planning on going?”

Years of being a loner made him uncomfortable at the mention of marriage. He wasn’t the marrying sort. He wasn’t even the relationship sort. He’d been on his own for so long, and that worked for him. But the thought of Emily with some other guy made him feel awful, like he’d been punched in the gut.

“Enough talking,” he said, smiling to soften his words. “Let’s enjoy having a bed.” Kissing her deeply, he breathed in the scent that was uniquely Emily, and tried to memorize it. Little kisses down her neck had her gasping as he licked across first one breast and then the other. He followed the trail down her stomach to her navel, licking her there, poking his tongue deep in to her navel until she squirmed, writhing against him.

“Oh my God,” she moaned as he continued laving her belly button. “It feels like you’re licking my pussy.”

“I’m saving that for next,” he informed her, then went back to her navel, enjoying her heavy breaths and her hands running over his head.

Licking lower, he pulled her tight jeans off, laughing as she kicked her legs, trying to help him remove them faster, but only succeeding in tangling herself. Finally he tugged them off, pulling her legs wide open so she lay spread before him on the bed. He grinned and licked a trail from the back of her knee, making her squeal at the tickle and try to pull her leg away. Mason laughed and held her leg still, tickling her for with his tongue for a moment longer before kissing up her inner thigh, finally stopping at her nether lips.

He touched her labia carefully, opening the soft pink folds like he was spreading the petals of a flower, and sucked her clit into his mouth. She gasped and ran her fingers over his shorn head, and he sucked harder.

“You taste so good,” he said, letting his hot breath hit her clit before flicking his tongue across her slick folds again, making her shudder beneath him.

He’d never met a woman who was so in tune with his sexual needs before. Granted, it had been a while since he’d been with a woman before Emily. In prison, he had to make do with his imagination and jerking off quietly at night after his cell mate had fallen asleep.

But now… He nibbled her labia, devouring her, wanting to eat her whole. She gave a low, keening cry as she climaxed, and he slid two fingers inside her, pressing on her G-spot, making her pussy clench around his fingers.

She cried out as he kept her orgasm going, tapping deep inside her, bringing another aftershock of her climax shuddering through her. When he had wrung out the last gasp, he smiled at her and dipped his head back between her legs.

“No!” she gasped as he began licking her clit again. “I can’t—I can’t—”

But she could. And within moments, his mouth never letting up, never giving her a moment’s reprieve, she came again, gasping and breathing hard as her head snapped forward toward her chest in ecstasy.

Pushing her knees up, he slid his hard cock inside her wet heat, his cock so lubricated from her climax he had no trouble pressing inside her tight pussy. Emily wrapped her legs around his waist, drawing him even closer, her feet spurring him forward to fuck her with fast, hard thrusts. He could feel her nails digging into his back as he went harder and deeper, pounding against her G-spot again and again.

“Harder,” she panted, her voice raw in his ear, stirring his lust as he held her tighter, determined to do just that.

Her pussy clenched around him, the muscles clamping over and over, and he felt himself sliding over the edge into his own orgasm—but he didn’t want to come, not yet. He wanted to fuck her for hours.

Panting, he pulled out, restraining her wrist when she moved to touch his hard, quivering cock. “I—I need a moment,” he said, closing his eyes. If he looked at Emily lying before him, her legs lewdly spread, her hair disheveled, he’d probably come all over her belly. He forced himself to think of something, anything else. Dandelion-root soup came to mind.

“Roll over,” he said, and the quick way she obeyed made his cock stir again. Running his hands over her back, he commenced massaging her again, until she was calm—jelly beneath his fingers. The pale white globes of her ass looked so enticing, lying there in front of him. He caressed her cheeks, feeling their fleshy smoothness. Spreading her legs, he dipped his finger down between her nether lips and touched her clit, making her writhe against his hand.

“Please,” she whimpered.

Positioning himself over her, he slid his cock deep inside her, letting his full weight fall against her small frame, and wrapped his hand around her waist, trapping it beneath her. He tapped her clit while she wiggled and squirmed, trying to move away, but with his hand caught beneath her body, all she could do was lie there and take the delicious assault as he fucked her deeply from behind while stimulating her clit to orgasm yet again. She bucked so hard she nearly shook him off, and he came hard, exploding inside her, breathing deeply as he finally gave in to the climax.

Her body beneath his was hot and sweaty, and he knew he was too. Rolling off of her, he lay pressed against her, panting, as the sweat dried on their bodies.

“That was fun,” Emily said, and smiled at him. God, her eyes were incredible.

“It was fun.”

“I really am tired, though,” Emily said. She curled against him, her head on his chest, and within minutes she fell asleep, worn out from her numerous orgasms.

Mason couldn’t sleep, though. They were in a strange place, in a strange town. The baby down the hall cried, and he could hear Melissa singing softly to calm the infant. He couldn’t imagine wanting to bring a child into this world. On a survival standpoint, he supposed at least an infant could breastfeed, but breastfeeding from a woman who wasn’t getting any nutrition to begin with wasn’t going to be very healthy for either.

How did they have beef? How could this town be doing so much better than everyone in New York City? Mason wished he could figure out a way to do something similar for himself. But his hackles still went up when he thought about living under someone else’s rule, like in a military camp, or even in a town or community like this. He liked to live alone, and make his own rules. That was how he rolled.

There was a sharp rap on the door, and Emily startled, lifting her head from his chest. Mason frowned. He’d locked the door, but with the eyehook. The door cracked open.

“Sorry to bother you,” Luke said. Emily sat up quickly, covering herself with her shirt.

“Hang on,” Mason said, annoyed. He looked over at Emily—she had pulled her clothing back on so quickly he never would have guessed she’d been naked and fast asleep on him. She tossed him his cargo pants and he pulled them on before opening the bedroom door. “What.”

Luke ignored him and looked at Emily. “Word’s out you’re here, Emily. There’re some people here to see you. They want to talk to a nurse.”

“She’s sleeping,” Mason said. “This wasn’t part of the deal. She walked all day, she needs to rest.”

Emily looked exhausted, but she pushed past Mason, saying, “Okay, I guess I can see some people.” Then she looked at Luke. “But we both need more food. Breakfast tomorrow.”

Luke nodded. “I’ll take up a collection outside, where they’re waiting.”

Mason didn’t like the sound of that—a bunch of people waiting to see her, for medical help. This town was going to work her to death, like they did to the other nurses. The dead ones.

“She’s not a doctor, you know,” he said, earning a dirty look from both Luke and Emily.

“I know that,” Emily said, obviously miffed. “But I’m better than nothing. And in case you forgot, you weren’t too picky about my credentials when you came to me with head trauma and almost died.”

Mason shook his head but knew when to shut up. There was no way to win this. He’d already shared his concerns with her—now she had to do her own thing. But damn if he didn’t want to put his foot down, insist that Luke not take advantage of her just because she was such a generous person.

But Emily was already walking out the door.

Grand Central Terminal

JENNA

Two days later, Jenna and Taryn stood next to each other on the Tracks. They had become fast friends, which surprised Jenna since Taryn had been aloof to begin with.

Taryn looked over at Jenna nervously. “I don’t know if I can do this. After I do a guy, I feel awful. Terrible.” She looked across the track at a brightly burning garbage fire, seemingly mesmerized by the flames.

“It’ll be better with me there,” Jenna promised. “I’ll take care of you. If you let me, I’ll make sure you orgasm—and with the two of us together, it’ll feel like fun more than work, you know?”

Taryn smiled. “I used to make out with girls at NYU when I got drunk, sometimes.” She giggled and shook her head at the memory. “You’re really pretty, Jenna.”

Jenna smiled, glowing more from that compliment than any compliment from a man. “So are you,” she said softly. Then she stepped out to the middle of the platform, gently pulling Taryn with her. “If we kiss here, you can pretend it’s like we’re at a keg party or something at NYU. Pretend I’m your sorority sister or whatever,” she laughed. “And the guys are going to love it. We’ll eat well tonight.”

“I’d kill for a drink,” Taryn said. “Let’s hold out for some alcohol.”

Jenna ran her fingers over Taryn’s pretty face and leaned in, gently kissing her full lips. She heard men’s voices and footsteps as they walked down the tracks. Pulling Taryn into her arms, she kissed her deeply, giggling as Taryn joined in, wrapping her slender arms around Jenna’s waist.

“I guess this isn’t so bad,” Taryn whispered, and Jenna smiled as the dark, dirty tracks disappeared around them and her whole world became kissing Taryn, breathing in her scent.

Jenna tentatively moved her hand to Taryn’s ass, cupping her through her pants. “Is that okay?” she whispered. She didn’t want anything to make Taryn uncomfortable—she’d had enough of that from the soldiers.

“Yes,” Taryn whispered back, a small smile on her lips. “That’s okay.” Reaching up, Taryn ran her fingers up Jenna’s belly, gently caressing her breast. “Is this okay?”

Jenna kissed her deeply, tasting her. “You can do whatever you want with me, Taryn. I like you.”

Taryn looked calmer, looser. She ran her thumb over the erect nipple showing through Jenna’s T-shirt and Jenna moaned, pressing her breasts forward into her hand.

A soldier cheered. “Take off the shirt,” he called.

Jenna looked up, surprised. A group of four soldiers watched them with interest. She started to lift her shirt, revealing her flat stomach and the bottoms of her full breasts, but then she stopped halfway. “Anyone got a drink? Alcohol?”

The soldiers talked amongst themselves, and one said, “I’ve got some homemade stuff. It’s safe, though. We’ve all been drinking it.”

Taryn nodded. “We each get two shots, right Jenna?”

Jenna almost laughed at her audacity, but she nodded. “And then we’ll give you the show of your life.”

The soldiers talked to each other again and the same guy spoke up. “All right. After, we’ll get you the drink.”

Jenna dropped her shirt. “No deal. You might stiff us.”

Another soldier, the one who had called for her to take her shirt off, looked at her in a threatening way. “I could fuck you right now and you wouldn’t be able to do a damn thing about it. In fact, I might do that.” He started to rub his crotch and Taryn gasped, her eyes filling with tears.

Damn him, Jenna thought. What an asshole.

But getting into a power struggle with a power-hungry man wouldn’t end well for either of them. “Of course you could,” she said demurely, “but I’d just lie there. It would be so dull, like jacking off. Instead, you could watch me as I lick this pretty girl’s pussy. Doesn’t that sound like more fun?”

The other soldiers nodded, and apparently the peer pressure made the guy calm down. “I guess,” he said.

“And when I’m drunk,” Taryn said, putting on a flirty voice Jenna had never heard before, “I’m such a slut. It’s really fun to watch. More fun than if I’m sober. That’s why I want the drink first.”

A flask appeared from one man’s pack. “One sip before, one after,” he said.

Jenna looked at Taryn, who nodded. “Deal,” she said.

Taryn took the flask, a look of pure desire in her eyes Jenna knew had nothing to do with her and everything to do with an opportunity to experience a few moments of blessed oblivion. Hopefully after tonight that would change. She’d make Taryn come so hard she’d never need a man again.

Taryn grinned and passed the flask to Jenna. “Tastes awful,” she giggled.

It did. It burned going down her throat, but she felt an almost instant warming in her belly that reminded her why she liked hard alcohol in the first place.

Handing the flask back to the soldier, Jenna stripped her shirt off, twirling it in her fingers. The men cheered and followed them into the subway car.

Taryn looked at Jenna’s bare breasts and licked her lips. “May I?” she asked.

“Whatever you want, remember?” Jenna said. Taryn kissed her nipple softly before drawing it into her mouth, running her tongue over her areola as she fingered her other nipple, gently tweaking it in time to her sucking. Jenna gasped and threw her head back, allowing Taryn more access to her breasts.

A soldier came up behind Taryn and tugged at the bottom of her shirt, trying to strip it off her. Taryn stopped sucking and stood up, looking around at the men in the subway car with a frightened look on her face. “Jenna,” she whispered.

Jenna pulled Taryn toward her and told the soldier, “This is a performance only, not an interactive deal. If you want to join, I can take care of each of you after the show, for an extra ration.”

“I want this one,” the soldier said, gesturing toward Taryn. She looked terrified.

20

SHIT. The last thing Jenna wanted was for her and Taryn’s “performance” to turn into a nightmare. She had to figure out a way to keep things from escalating without upsetting the men.

Jenna put her arm around Taryn and winked at the soldier. “If you really want her, then pretend you’re me.”

The soldier must have liked the idea of that, because he laughed and sat down.

“Can I take your shirt off?” Jenna asked Taryn. Just being asked for something the men had tried without permission seemed to make Taryn feel better, and she nodded as Jenna slowly stripped her dirty T-shirt over her head. “You’re so beautiful,” Jenna said, and the men hooted in agreement.

Jenna leaned in close to Taryn and whispered in her ear. “It’s me and you. Close your eyes and just… feel.”

Taryn nodded, closing her eyes, her breath evening out.

“Hold on to the bar,” Jenna suggested, and Taryn reached above her head, grabbing hold of the bar that ran across the middle of the subway car for riders to hold on to when it was standing room only, which, Jenna remembered, used to be all the time.

Jenna ran her hands over Taryn’s naked torso, warming her skin, getting her comfortable. The soldiers watched with rapt attention, but they were, in fact, treating it like a show—sitting back and viewing.

Taryn wiggled her hips, and Jenna slowly tugged her sweat pants down, pulling them off with a flourish, leaving the girl naked. The flames from the garbage fire outside their subway car made her body seem to glow in the dim light.

Jenna dropped little nipping kisses across Taryn’s belly, licking fully around her waist until she was behind Taryn, admiring her pert bottom. Running her hands over Taryn’s ass, she slipped her fingers down her cleft, finding her clit from behind. The girl moaned, but she was still dry, probably from fear of the soldiers.

She’d have to remedy that. Jenna ran her fingers over Taryn’s ass cheeks, tickling her, and when she started to giggle a little, Jenna slipped her fingers back to her clit, rubbing softly. She was starting to get a bit wet now. Good.

Jenna came back around to Taryn’s front and kissed her on the mouth as she played with her pussy, not entering her, lightly teasing her nether lips with soft strokes, then finding her clit and flicking it just a little with her fingertip. Her teasing had the desired effect—soon Taryn moaned and pressed her wet cunt against Jenna’s hand, writhing against her.

“You want more?” Jenna asked quietly, and Taryn nodded, her eyes still pressed shut. Twirling her fingers in the dark, moist curls that covered Taryn’s mound, Jenna rubbed her swollen clit, keeping up a steady rhythm with one hand, and then she slid a finger deep inside her, so both of her hands were buried between Taryn’s legs.

The soldiers, Jenna couldn’t help but notice, were all entranced, and all hard as rocks. Their pants tented comically as they looked at the two women.

Jenna winked at them and flicked her tongue out, trailing wet kisses down Taryn’s neck, dropping between her breasts, sliding down her smooth belly, and finally meeting her hands at Taryn’s pussy. Jenna spread Taryn’s labia apart and kissed her clit, licking it lazily, until Taryn’s thighs quivered.

She grabbed the girl’s thighs and held them, caressing her, sucking at her slick juncture with renewed enthusiasm. Taryn cried out, a gush of moisture covering Jenna’s mouth and chin, trickling down Taryn’s inner thighs.

“Oh my God,” Taryn said, her eyes snapping open. “What just happened?” She looked down at the moisture covering her inner thighs and at Jenna.

Jenna grinned and wiped her face with the back of her hand, laughing. “You had an orgasm. Surely that’s happened before, right?”

The girl nodded slowly, then whispered, “I’ve never done that before when I came!”

Jenna laughed again and held her hand up to Taryn’s nose. “It’s clean—smell it, silly. It’s not pee, it’s your come.”

Taryn sniffed Jenna’s hand and laughed with her. “Oh that is so gross.”

“They don’t think it was gross, do you guys?” Jenna asked, finally bringing the men into the conversation.

All four men shook their heads, looking shell-shocked. The one who had the flask pulled it out and handed it to Taryn, smiling gallantly. “Definitely not gross,” he agreed. “Watching you come is hot as all hell.”

The other soldiers nodded in agreement and Jenna took a deep long sip, though she was reluctant to chase away Taryn’s musky taste from her mouth.

The soldier who had threatened her before stood up, his tented pants no longer looking comical to Jenna. “I’m done watching,” he said. His intention was clear—but Taryn wasn’t ready for that, no way.

“Come back another night,” Jenna said sweetly. “I’ll take care of you then.”

The man shook his head. “How ’bout now.”

It wasn’t a request, she could tell. Jenna’s heart raced. The other soldiers had stepped outside, leaving their buddy. Maybe they knew what he was like, and didn’t want to be a part of it. But they also didn’t want to help the girls. As long as Taryn didn’t have to be a part of it, Jenna was game.

“It’s your turn to grab the bar, Jenna,” the soldier said, his voice low. “And I’m not asking.”

His commanding voice made her instantly wet. “You don’t need to ask, soldier,” Jenna purred. “Especially if you plan on using that tongue of yours for more than just talking.”

Potterskill, NY

MASON

Mason looked over at Emily and frowned. Her beautiful face looked worn and tired. She’d been working nearly around the clock since they came to Luke’s house, helping a steady barrage of Potterskill residents with everything from an infected hangnail to a case of walking pneumonia.

Mason winced as he overheard Emily explain to a man, the son of one of the remaining elderly residents, that his mother was going dusky gray every so often because her oxygen saturation was low. The woman needed extra oxygen, but since she was so old and had very little chance of surviving much longer Emily had to suggest one of the few available oxygen tanks go to the young man with pneumonia who stood a good chance of pulling through fine.

Triage. It broke his heart thinking about the terrible choices Emily was being forced to make. It didn’t help any that the people were alternating between being happy she was there and suspecting she would only bring trouble.

Some people wanted her kicked out already.

Mason and Emily ate well, though, and had spent the last two nights sleeping in Luke and Melissa’s house, which was nice except for the occasional baby cry waking them.

Emily looked like she had gained a pound or so, if that was even possible in just a few days. But eating until they were full three times a day, real food—it did wonders. And it made it almost seem worth it.

Until he looked at Emily again and realized she was beyond exhaustion. This town would work her to death, until she literally died from the illnesses she fought to treat.

He had to step in. Had to make them treat her right and set some rules. She shouldn’t be working so hard, for so long, without rest. He wished he had her medical knowledge so he could step in and help her, but he didn’t.

Mason walked past the people standing in line to see her, getting more than a few dirty looks in the process. “Emily,” he called, getting her attention. She looked up at him, her eyes blurry and red. “I need to talk to you.”

“I can’t,” she said, shrugging helplessly. “I have patients.”

Mason turned toward the line of people. “Emily will be back in two hours to see you. You can either wait here or go home and come back.” The crowd actually booed, and Mason shook his head. They didn’t care about her, not a bit.

“Mason,” Emily said, looking at him. “What are you doing?”

“You’re taking a nap. If you don’t lie down you’re going to pass out, and then you won’t be of use to anybody.”

“No, I can’t do that.”

“Pretend you were your own patient. What would you say to yourself?”

She paused. “Fine.”

She seemed relieved, and took Mason’s hand when he offered it. As much as he desired her, he wasn’t going to interfere with her nap time, even though the thought of her sprawled on that queen-sized bed made his cock twitch in his pants.

He made sure she went into the house and closed the door to the back bedroom before he let her out of his sight. Now Luke was going to get an earful.

Mason found Luke in the backyard, planting tomatoes. They had a very decent vegetable garden going. When he wasn’t watching over Emily, Mason had spent the past few days watching over Luke as he worked in the garden, asking him questions, trying to learn a bit about the process. Mason had never grown anything before, and the one time he had a houseplant it had died.

“Luke, this can’t continue,” he said straight off.

Luke peered at him from under the oversized hat he wore to protect his face and neck from the sun. “Not my doing.”

Just the fact that Luke knew exactly what Mason was talking about made Mason angrier. “This town is taking advantage of her. I won’t stand for it.”

“You’re both eating pretty well. You’re eating so well, in fact, I’d say maybe you’re the one taking advantage of her.” Luke went back to digging with a broken spade, the handle held on with duct tape.

Anger rose in Mason like bile, and he swallowed hard before the sour taste could hit his mouth. This asshole didn’t know him. He didn’t know anything about their situation. “She can see patients for two hours in the morning. That’s it. She’ll round on other people she’s already treating for two hours in the afternoon. And that’s the extent of it. No more. No less. If you have a problem with that, you’ll have to go through me.”

Luke stood. “Sounds like part-time work for full-time food, for two people. We’d have to cut the salary, to one meal a day, and just for her.”

“Like hell you will. Three meals a day, for both of us, and I’ll work doing whatever you need, planting or fixing stuff or whatever.”

“No deal.” Luke went back to gardening, apparently feeling pretty secure in the fact they had nowhere else to go.

Mason cursed under his breath. “Maybe we’ll leave.”

“Leave then. I like having Emily here, but she’s managed to piss off some people by waltzing in here and taking over, including taking oxygen away from an old lady.”

“You asked her to help. This is how she helps.”

“Well, maybe when she’s done helping, you guys should skedaddle.”

Mason sobered at the thought. He didn’t want them both kicked out. If anyone had to leave it should be him, but he didn’t trust the townspeople to take care of Emily the way he would.

“Maybe you should leave,” Luke said quietly at Mason’s prolonged silence. “She can stay.”

“I’m not leaving her here alone with you people. This town is overridden with men, and I don’t trust any of them, including you.”

He shrugged. “She’d be safe here. We’re not like those guys in the city.”

Mason gaped. “How’d you hear about that?”

“Just a guess, based on your attitude problem.” Luke continued. “Potterskill is a very tightly run ship. We have enough food and supplies for our residents and no more. The only reason we let you in the first place was so Emily could treat Melissa. Emily has since earned her keep. I think we need her, even if some others don’t feel the same way. I wouldn’t mind having her stay, but we don’t need you. You’re taking up valuable resources. If you want to stick together then she has to leave with you.”

“Who are you to decide? There’s a whole slew of folks out there who live in Potterskill too, and they might feel differently.” Mason gestured to the line of Emily’s patients.

Luke nodded thoughtfully. “I’ll put it before the council tonight, then. We’ll have a town hall meeting and people can vote.”

Fuck. What if they voted them out? If they didn’t think Mason and Emily were hitched then they might agree to at least keep Emily. All those men in town would definitely want Mason out of the picture so they could try for a chance with her. But the meeting would give Mason a chance to state his case, at least. He didn’t want a handout, he wanted to work for his food.

Mason stormed off, slamming the gate behind him. Damn him. It made sense, he knew that. Everything Luke said made sense. If Mason was in charge of keeping an entire community safe and fed and alive, he’d probably do the same thing. Here, Emily would be fed well. She’d gain weight. But what about when she caught some illness and died, like all the nurses and doctors before her?

He had to make sure she stayed safe.

Mason took the time while Emily napped to walk around the center of town. The people looked happy here. Busy, perhaps. Hardworking, definitely. But the bad sorts were all gone or dead by now. So were the weaker ones. Maybe next winter wouldn’t hit them as hard as the last, now that they had fewer people to keep alive. To keep fed and warm. If everyone stockpiled firewood, enough to last through the winter, outside each of their houses, and stockpiled food now—maybe made a bunch of beef jerky—they could be okay.

How would Emily fare if he took her from here? On the road, they could die. Maybe if they found another setup like this one, they’d be all right. But one of the reasons Potterskill thrived was that they were smart about things, triaging supplies for their own people, and refusing to let hungry travelers put their survival in mortal danger.

He needed to give Emily a chance to stay in the town, even if they didn’t want Mason.

Mason walked back to Luke’s house. He was still planting. The man stood up when Mason came through the back gate.

“I’m not here to start trouble,” Mason said, his hands up as if to say he surrendered. “I’ll stand by whatever the council decides tonight. I just want to talk.”

“So talk.”

“Me and Emily aren’t really married. We met in New York City a couple weeks ago.”

This didn’t seem to be what Luke expected to hear. He raised his eyebrows and stayed silent in an implicit invitation for Mason to continue.

“I’m probably more… more attached to her than I should be, all things considered. I told her I’d make sure she was safe. So—I’m thinking you guys can probably keep her safer in here than I can out there.”

Luke nodded.

“I’m nervous, though,” Mason continued. “Nervous about leaving her, a single young woman, alone here. I need to know there will be a man, one of your residents you won’t be kicking out, ever, to watch over her. To keep her from the other guys, like how you take care of Melissa.”

“No one would touch Melissa,” Luke interrupted. “They wouldn’t dare.”

“Exactly my point.”

Luke thought on this for a moment and nodded. “Okay.”

“So I need a few more days here, even if the council decides tonight I need to go and she can stay. If you make me leave tomorrow, I’ll take her with me to make sure she’s okay. But if you really want to keep her, I need a bit more time to make sure you honor her new work hours, and to find a guy who will look after her. Then I’ll leave.”

“What does Emily say about this?”

“Emily doesn’t know yet about the town hall meeting tonight—I still have to tell her.”

Emily had been growing more and more confident each day she spent with him, and she’d proven that she can take care of herself. She probably wouldn’t care at all if he left.

That should have made him feel better, but for some reason it didn’t. It’s a good thing she’s able to protect herself without me around, he told himself. A good thing.

“For my own peace of mind, let me stay a few more days.”

“For your peace of mind?” Luke snorted. “I only care about keeping my town safe and secure. I don’t give a shit about your peace of mind.”

Mason had to make sure Emily would be okay. “Then I’ll take her with me tomorrow morning.” He wasn’t even sure if he was bluffing or not, so he doubted Luke would know.

Luke sighed. “Fine. If the council decides to kick you out of Potterskill but let Emily stay, I’ll recommend they give you three days to wrap things up. Today’s Saturday—I want you gone by Monday, whether you take her or not. But for her own good, I’d suggest you let her stay where she has a chance at surviving.”

Mason nodded and went to wake Emily up from her nap. The line of people waiting to see her was still long. They had all waited outside for the past two hours.

Was there any chance the council would let him stay here in Potterskill with Emily?

He had a lot of work to do before Monday. First he need to make sure she wasn’t going to end up being worked to death, and the only way to do that was to insist she stand up for herself. Second, he needed to find a man for her to live with. In three days.

The thought of another man putting his hands on her made him so angry he could barely think straight, but there was no other way.

She wasn’t his to keep.

But how could he get the right person to watch over Emily for him without her realizing what he was up to? Mason knocked on the back bedroom door softly. No answer.

He stepped inside, annoyed she hadn’t thought to lock the door. If he had been anyone else, she could have been in danger. But as soon as someone stood up and claimed her, like Luke did for Melissa, no one would dare touch her. Luke and Melissa had a good life—and it would be selfish of him to not want the same for Emily.

But he’d always been selfish. Always been a loner. Just because he wanted to continue being with Emily didn’t mean he had a free pass to put his needs above hers. No, she had taught him something about generosity, and he intended to put that knowledge to good use.

She looked so beautiful, lying there on the bed, her legs sprawled across the bedspread, her mouth slightly open as she slept deeply. He didn’t want to wake her, but he had to. The people were waiting.

He leaned down and kissed her cheek lightly and she stirred, opening her chocolate brown eyes.

She sat up on the bed. “Thanks for making me nap,” she said.

“You need to start sticking up for yourself. Promise me from now on you won’t let yourself get overtired or sick.”

“Well, nurses are notorious for putting other people’s needs first. I once gave myself a bladder infection when I worked at Roosevelt because I held my pee so long. Every time I wanted to take a bathroom break, a call bell would ring, or something would happen that needed my immediate attention.”

“See?” Mason said. “That’s exactly what I’m talking about. You can’t be like that here. You have to set limits, and demand people respect them.”

She looked up at him and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him down on the bed for a kiss. “That’s what you’re for.”

Her lips tasted so sweet, so wonderful, he could easily get lost in her kiss. But it wasn’t fair to let her think he’d be here when he’d probably have to leave her in three days. Pulling back, he disentangled himself from her embrace awkwardly, leaving her sitting on the bed with a hurt look on her face.

“They’re all waiting for you,” he said softly. She nodded and got up, leaving him without another glance back.

21

Grand Central Terminal

JENNA

Jenna and Taryn were alone in the subway car on the Tracks with the soldier. He tore his shirt off after he had told Jenna it was her turn to grab the bar. Dog tags glowed against his muscular chest in the light of the fire.

Jenna’s pussy got wet when she grasped hold of the cold metal above her head, pushing her breasts toward the soldier.

“Come on, soldier,” she said, “eat my pussy. Show Taryn you’re not as scary as she thinks you are.” Jenna looked over at Taryn, who didn’t look any more at ease now than she had before.

Taryn, naked, her pale skin covered in gooseflesh now, whimpered and sat against the hard seat, looking like she was trying to disappear into the cold orange plastic.

“It’s okay, honey,” Jenna said calmly. She could tell Taryn seemed freaked out by the soldier joining their little performance. “This man—what’s your name, sir?”

The soldier loomed over, at least a foot taller than her. “It doesn’t matter.”

“Okay,” Jenna said. She’d hoped to get the man on friendlier terms, to ease up on the alpha act for Taryn’s sake, even though Jenna thought it was hot. But he wasn’t looking friendly. Even his prick looked menacing, pressing hard against his army pants.

He glanced at Taryn. “Now it’s your turn to watch.”

Taryn jumped up then, as if to save Jenna, but Jenna shook her head. “It’s okay, hon, it’ll be fun,” she said. “We’re gonna have a good time, me and Mister Man over here.”

Taryn shook her head, looking like she wanted to say something but couldn’t. All that came out was a weak mew of terror. Her voice sounded so tiny.

Jenna looked at the soldier, dropping her arms from the metal bar. He still hadn’t touched her, even though her empty cunt ached for relief. “What do you have as payment, sir? Food? Anything?”

He grinned, a scary smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “Grab the bar, slut.”

This would have been perfect if it had had been her and the soldier, without Taryn around to worry about. Taryn’ll be fine. No big deal. She’d talk to Taryn after and explain it was no biggie. Let him do it and be done with it so they could get on with their evening. Jenna grabbed the bar, smiling gamely as he slowly unzipped his pants, his cock looking huge and veined.

“You don’t know who I am, do you?” he asked.

Suddenly her instincts shifted into overdrive. Something’s wrong. Something’s very wrong here.

He wrapped his meaty hand around her throat, his menacing gaze boring into her. “You wanna know my name, bitch?”

Don’t panic.

She focused on breathing as his grip on her neck tightened. “It’s okay, you don’t have to tell me anything,” she gasped. “But you’re hurting me, please let go of my neck.”

He kept his hand on her neck as if to remind her he was in control. “You really don’t know who I am, do you. You’re even dumber than you look.”

Who was he? Jenna searched his face, but she couldn’t place it. She’d seen him around, she’d seen all the soldiers around. But she’d never serviced him before. She’d remember that.

“I—I’m sorry,” she whispered. “Tell me who you are. Remind me, I’ll remember.”

“I’m Andrews.”

Andrews? But—that was the soldier everyone said Emily killed. That didn’t make any sense. “You can’t be Andrews,” she squeaked. “Andrews is dead.”

“Eric Andrews,” he said, talking slowly like she was dumb. “The Andrews who is dead is Mike. And I’m Mike Andrews’s brother. You roomed and whored with the cunt who killed my brother, and I’m going to make sure she hears about what I’m about to do to you.”

Oh shit. This wasn’t good. Jenna looked over the soldier’s massive shoulder at Taryn. The other girl, still naked, had a look of crazed fear in her eyes. Her hands trembled as she hefted the soldier’s rifle and pointed it precariously at his back.

“No,” she whispered. “Taryn, don’t. It’s okay.”

Taryn must have heard her but she didn’t listen. “Let her go you son of a bitch!” she screamed, the rifle still pointed at the Eric Andrews’s back.

The soldier ignored her, not even turning around. Taryn looked ready to shoot. But Jenna stood directly in front of him—if Taryn shot him, would the bullet go straight through him and into her? She didn’t know much about guns or bullets, but she knew those army-issued rifles were powerful.

Gasping, Jenna flung her leg forward, kneeing the soldier in the groin. He cursed and dropped his hand from around her throat, reaching his hand back to slap her face as she fell to the floor of the subway car.

A loud shot rang out, deafening in the tiny space.

Eric Andrews’s face went pale and his mouth dropped open like a fish, frothy spittle dripping down his chin from the corner of his mouth. He collapsed forward onto Jenna on the floor.

Jenna groaned as his weight hit her—over two hundred pounds at least.

“Oh my God,” Taryn whispered. “Oh my God, what did I do, what did I do?”

The sound of the shot had all the soldiers in the Tracks running. Within moments a group of men gathered at the door to their subway car. Jenna didn’t know what they expected to find, but a small naked woman holding one of their rifles and one of their own troops dead on top of a whore probably wasn’t it.

Jenna scrambled, trying to get out from under Andrews’s deadweight. Two soldiers came to her aid. No, she realized. Not to her aid. They were trying to save the soldier, pulling him off her only so they could assess his injuries.

He was dead—dead as his brother.

She looked over at Taryn, who screamed at the top of her lungs as the soldiers grabbed the gun from her shaking hands and picked her naked body up, dragging her out of the car.

“I had to do it!” Taryn screamed.

One of the soldiers saw Jenna and grabbed her arm as well.

Taryn shook her head wildly. “Don’t touch her, she didn’t do anything wrong,” she sobbed. “It was all me. I killed him, she told me not to but she couldn’t stop me.”

Tears filled Jenna’s eyes as her friend tried to save her for the second time that evening.

“We’re taking you to Colonel Lanche,” one of the soldiers said, looking down at Taryn with disgust. “He’ll take care of you.”

“Please, please don’t do that,” Jenna said. “He’ll have her executed.”

“She deserves to be executed—she’s a murderer, like your other friend, Emily. Something has to be very wrong with you,” the soldier said thoughtfully, looking at his fallen comrade, “for you to hang out with these fucked-up chicks.”

“Please,” Jenna begged, falling to her knees, “don’t let him kill her for this. She was trying to protect me.”

Taryn cried so hard she looked like she could barely breathe, and her naked flesh shivered in the light of the garbage fire. Jenna picked up her oversized T-shirt and sweat pants and went over to her friend as she struggled weakly in the soldier’s arms.

“Let me dress her,” Jenna said. “Please.”

The soldier nodded and Jenna carefully dropped the shirt over Taryn’s head, pulling her arms through the sleeves like she might dress a child, or a doll.

“Thank you,” Taryn whispered, stepping into the pants as Jenna quickly pulled them up around her waist before the men changed their minds.

“I’m so sorry about this, Taryn,” she whispered, kissing her cheek, tasting the salty tears.

“I’ll be okay,” Taryn said. “Even if they kill me, I’ll be okay.”

Jenna started crying with her then. “I won’t let them kill you,” she said.

The soldier grabbed Taryn again, holding her arms behind her back and forcing her to move forward. Taryn dragged her feet, refusing to walk to her death.

A soldier shook his head as they all walked off with the girl. “Don’t make promises you can’t keep.”

Potterskill, NY

MASON

Mason didn’t want to tell Emily about the town hall meeting that would decide his fate. He had no choice, however. After all, they were deciding whether she could stay as well.

Mason had no doubt the people would vote to keep Emily, but she was obviously very upset anyway. Her brow furrowed as they followed the line of people into the meeting.

“Don’t worry,” Mason whispered as they entered the large town hall, lit with homemade wall sconces and candles. “They need you.”

“I’m not worried about me,” she whispered back, her eyes filled with concern. “What if they make you leave?”

Mason shrugged, trying to act nonchalant even as his stomach churned at the thought.

The Potterskill council consisted of half a dozen men, including Luke. Every resident in town had shown up that evening, murmuring softly amongst themselves.

Luke struck a gavel on an old folding table, and the people quieted.

“We’re here this evening to place a vote on whether or not to allow two new residents into our town,” Luke said, holding everyone’s attention. “In making your decision, please remember that every extra person we take on severely taxes our limited resources. That being said, Emily is a skilled nurse, as many of you know.”

Mason frowned. Luke obviously didn’t want him staying in Potterskill. Mason raised his hand, coughing loudly so he couldn’t be ignored.

Luke nodded in his direction. “Go ahead.”

Mason stood, addressing the group. “I’m Mason. I’ll do whatever it takes to earn my keep here—I can help with any manual labor you have. I’m good with firearms, so I can help hunt, and I can do guard duty up at the road too if you guys needed me to. I know I may seem like another mouth to feed, but if you let me stay I promise I will give more than I take.” That was it. He had nothing more to add, nothing more to offer. He sat back down on the metal folding chair.

Luke turned to Emily. “Do you have anything to add?”

Emily blushed bright pink, making her look even more breathtaking to Mason. “Um, I’m a registered nurse, as you know. I’ve upset some of you by being realistic about your town’s medical resources. If you let me stay that will probably happen again, but I think it’s better to have a trained professional triage than to make the wrong decision based on emotion. I’d really like to stay, and have Mason be allowed to stay too. He’s very strong and like he said he’s great with guns. He’d be a good guy to have around for extra protection.”

The townspeople started murmuring again and Mason felt his insides twist. Most of them were men—and there was no way those men wanted Emily’s lover keeping her off the market. Fuck. This couldn’t end well.

“There’s one more thing I have to say,” Emily interrupted. “Potterskill is an amazing community, and I think I speak for both of us when I say we’d love to be a part of it. But there are other places that are hell on earth, like the military camp at Grand Central run by Colonel Lanche. I don’t know if Potterskill has the ability to get the word out about Grand Central, but if you can help the people living there…” She trailed off as if she didn’t know exactly what she hoped would happen.

Luke lifted his gavel. “Okay,” he said loudly. “All those in favor of Emily being allowed to stay on in Potterskill as a permanent resident, raise your hand.”

Almost every single hand rose. No surprise there.

“All those in favor of Mason being allowed to stay on in Potterskill as a permanent resident, raise your hand.”

This time, out of a room filled with over a hundred people, only a few scattered hands went up. All women.

Mason’s heart sank into his stomach, feeling like it was being slowly eaten away by the churning acid. The town had decided. He was out.

“Emily, welcome to Potterskill,” Luke said. “Mason, you have three days and then you need to leave.”

“Wh-what about Grand Central?” she asked, her voice tight.

Luke’s eyes softened. “We have a very limited mail system, as you know. I can try to get a message out, but there’s not much we can do. We certainly can’t afford to take in a city full of refugees from the camp.”

Mason nodded slowly. He had expected as much, on both counts. Emily had bright tears in her eyes, but she did a pretty good job of holding herself together.

“If you have to leave,” Emily whispered to him, “I’ll leave too.”

“I don’t need you to come with me,” he lied.

The hurt look on her face made him feel like he’d been punched in the gut. He couldn’t think about sparing her feelings right now. If he had to leave on Monday, then he had a lot of preparations to make. Such as finding Emily a replacement—for himself.

Mason urged Emily to go without him to church the following morning. Not because he had anything against church. He wanted to hang back, and observe. He could always join her later if he needed to.

Potterskill had a large church following, and the place was packed. The town did seem to consist mainly of young men and only a dozen or so women, although those women were already paired off with some of the men. A few skinny children played on the road outside the church, not needing to be mindful of traffic.

Emily went to bed early after the town meeting, but Mason spent Saturday night talking to Luke, who had three suggestions for eligible men. Luke assured him that each of the men would provide for Emily and protect her. Mason walked by their houses the following morning, and instantly got rid of two of the choices.

One man had a woman leaving his house at the crack of dawn, so he wasn’t the right guy to ask to take care of Emily—he already had a woman, whoever she was. The other man looked nice. Too nice. Like the sort of man that other men wouldn’t be afraid of. And that defeated the purpose.

When Mason saw Brad Crimshaw, however, he knew he had found the right guy. Brad was a big dude—the type of guy that other guys wouldn’t want to mess with, so they’d keep their hands off his woman. He had a small but well-maintained house, a ton of firewood already chopped, and the guy certainly didn’t look like he was hungry. So he would do fine.

And he was walking into the church now.

“Brad,” Mason called. The other man looked up in surprise.

“Who’s asking?”

“Name’s Mason. I came here with the nurse, Emily.”

Brad smiled. “Oh yeah, Emily! My cousin got a nasty cut helping me chop wood, and she took real good care of it. Probably won’t get infected now, hopefully, anyway.”

“Must be hard, not having any young women around,” Mason said, trying to think of a way to broach the subject.

“I didn’t touch her,” Brad said darkly, looking ready to throw down.

Mason laughed. “It’s okay, I’m not here about that. I’m not—I told the guards I was her husband, but I’m not. Listen, can we keep this between us for now?”

The man grunted. Mason took that as a yes.

“As you know, I have to be leaving soon. Tomorrow, actually. I want you to meet Emily, see if you like her. And then I have a proposition for you.”

Brad raised his eyebrow. “What?”

“I want you to take care of her after I leave. Let her live with you. Make sure she eats and doesn’t get overworked, that sort of thing.”

Mason looked at Brad, wondering what he’d say to his unusual proposition. Mason needed to know she’d be looked after and protected by a guy who wasn’t a complete douche bag.

“I can’t do that, man,” Brad said, shaking his head.

Mason cursed under his breath. “You already got a woman?”

“No.”

“You, um…” Mason stopped himself. Asking Brad if he was a homosexual was probably not the best way to win points with the guy. But his hesitation gave his question away anyway.

Brad laughed. “Nope, not gay. But that sounds like some sort of arranged marriage, man. It’s still America.”

“I’m not asking you to force her into anything. Just be persistent. I’ll let her know I think she should be with you too.”

“Well, I admit it would be nice to live with a woman. Gets lonely sometimes, especially with so few women left.” Brad looked at Mason. “So I’ll meet her, I guess. But no promises.”

“I don’t have time to fuck around,” Mason growled. “I have to leave tomorrow. So if you can take care of her for me, I’d be able to leave feeling okay about it. And you’d make out well, you know you would. Emily’s a good girl, and she’s beautiful, you know she is.”

Brad nodded. “She is.”

Mason gestured inside the church. “She’s sitting in there.”

“No, I’m not.” Emily’s voice behind him startled him.

“Emily, I thought you were in church,” Mason said, surprised.

“I was. I had to use the outhouse. I was going to go back in but someone twisted his ankle on the way back so I—” She sighed. “You know the drill.” She turned and looked up at Brad. “Hi, I’m Emily.”

Brad shook her hand and smiled at her. “Brad Crimshaw. You fixed up my cousin’s leg. Much obliged.”

“Oh, it’s my pleasure. How’s he doing?” she asked.

“Fine.”

“No redness, no oozing, no signs of infection?” she asked, going into nurse mode. “No fever?”

“No,” Brad said, the smile widening. “He’s good. Gosh, you’re a sweet girl, aren’t you?”

Emily blushed and Mason felt his stomach roll. When he left, she was going to fall in love with Brad. And they were going to sleep together. The thought of Brad with his hands all over Emily made him feel sick to his stomach, even if Brad seemed like a nice enough man.

Emily is mine, damn it.

He wanted to take her with him, and forget the whole plan to leave her in another man’s capable hands. But he couldn’t do that. He had to be selfless this time, for Emily’s sake.

“Brad’s got a house on the edge of town,” Mason said. “Lots of firewood.”

“That’s… nice,” Emily said, looking at Mason with a strange expression on her face. “Were you going into the church?” she asked both the men.

“I was going to,” Brad said. “But Mason here had some questions for me.”

“I see.” The confused expression on her face indicated she had no idea what was going on. “Well, I’m going back in. You coming?”

Mason nodded. “In a minute.”

Brad hung back too as Emily walked into the church, taking a seat near the back so as not to disturb the service.

“Well?” Mason asked, looking at Brad, who still watched her from the doorway.

22

Mason looked at Brad expectantly, wondering if this was the man who would look after Emily for him when he had to leave her behind tomorrow.

“She’s beautiful,” Brad admitted again. “Why don’t you bring Emily by my place after church so we can get to know each other a bit better before I make any promises. You could help chop more wood.”

Mason nodded. He should feel happy, knowing that it would only be a matter of time before Emily won over Brad and ensured her own future in the town. Instead he felt like he’d been sucker punched in the gut.

After church, Emily, Mason and Brad walked over to Brad’s house. Mason stayed back a few steps, letting Emily get to know Brad a bit. She didn’t even notice that Mason lagged behind, since she had so many questions about all her patients that Brad knew.

“Have you run into that short woman with the pinkeye? How’s her eye look now? She hasn’t come back to see me and tomorrow it will be too late,” Emily said.

She thought she was going with Mason. But he couldn’t let her do that. He couldn’t be that selfish.

Brad seemed to slow his long stride to match Emily’s shorter steps, something that had taken Mason a while to figure out how to do since he was so used to walking alone. Brad took to it easily, as if he’d been born to walk beside Emily. Emily, however, didn’t appear to notice the way Brad smiled at her.

“You want to come in for some tea?” Brad asked. “I make it with mint leaves.”

“That sounds perfect,” Emily said, looking back over her shoulder to grin at Mason.

“I’m going to get started on chopping wood. Maybe you can get a mug ready for me,” Mason said, averting his eyes. He couldn’t look at her, knowing that she wanted him to take her with him and that he couldn’t let that happen—not if Brad agreed to take her in. Mason had to protect Emily, even if that meant letting her go.

Brad crossed the garden with Mason and showed him the downed tree that needed chopping. “Thanks for your help, man,” Brad said. “Come inside for tea when you need a break.”

“I will.” Mason hefted the axe and brought it down hard, glad to have something to accomplish to keep his mind off the fact that tomorrow, he’d be gone. And he’d never see Emily again.

Emily entered Brad Crimshaw’s modest home and smiled when he pulled a chair out for her.

“I’ll get some water boiling,” Brad said. With Mason outside, Brad seemed nervous around her.

“His bark is worse than his bite,” she said, nodding out the window to Mason chopping wood with a look of fierce determination. “You don’t have to be so nervous.”

“I’m not nervous,” Brad said, tossing mint leaves into the pot to let them steep. “I heard you guys aren’t really together.”

Emily flushed. “We’re not married, no.”

“But you like him.”

She glanced out the window at Mason again, and this time she caught his eye. She couldn’t keep the flirtatious smile off her face. “Yeah,” she said, turning back to Brad as he handed her a mug of mint tea. “I like him.”

Mason stopped and wiped his brow with his forearm and chanced yet another glance in Brad’s kitchen window. He could see Emily inside, grinning happily as she chatted with Brad.

Seeing her with Brad tore Mason up inside. This is for real, he thought. She’ll fall in love with Brad when I’m gone, and she’ll be safe and happy here.

He brought the axe down on the tree trunk with a thud. Why was this so hard for him? Mason swung the axe again, determined to block out his overwhelming conflicting emotions through sheer force.

Brad came out with a mug of tea and handed it to Mason. He was worked up from the exercise and would’ve preferred cold water instead, but he sipped from the mug anyway and waited for Brad to speak first.

“I’ll do it,” Brad said. He seemed surprised by his own words as he looked back into his kitchen window at Emily. “She’s great. I’ll take her in, if she’ll have me. I’ll take care of her.”

“Really?” Mason knew he should feel like a burden had been lifted—like he was free, free of having to protect Emily, free to go and live alone like he had always done his whole life. Instead, he felt awful, like a heavy weight sat in his chest. “Thanks, man,” he said. “I’ll feel better leaving her here if I know she’s being looked after.”

“You don’t want to leave her, do you?” Brad asked, his eyebrow raising. He crossed his arms in front of his chest and waited for Mason’s response.

“No, it’s fine,” he lied. “I’ve only known her for a few weeks. I told her I’d protect her until she was safe. And that’s what I did. I wouldn’t mind staying here if I could, but you heard the council. They can’t afford anyone else. Only Emily, because she’s a nurse.”

Brad nodded slowly. “True.”

“That’s the other thing—she’ll work herself to death if someone doesn’t stop her. You need to make sure she’s not just taking care of other people—that she takes care of herself too. And next winter, when people start getting sick, you gotta make sure she doesn’t get sick too. Maybe have her wear a mask or something. I don’t know. I don’t know much about that stuff, but she does. So talk to her about it.”

“Okay,” Brad said. “So you’re gonna leave tomorrow, huh?”

“Yeah. Emily thinks she’s coming with me, but you know I can’t let that happen—for her sake.”

“She won’t want to be with me. She obviously has a thing for you,” Brad said. “There’s no way she’ll just forget you and marry me, because she’ll think you’re coming back.”

“I’ll leave a note,” Mason said. “You can give it to her. It’ll say that I’m gone and she should be with you.” Mason swallowed hard around the lump forming in his throat.

Brad nodded. “If you’re giving her to me, I’m taking you up on it. Obviously she has to decide for herself, I mean. If she’s not into me I won’t force her into anything.” He paused. “You’re a moron for leaving her.”

Mason frowned and Brad laughed, putting his hands up. “Just saying,” Brad said, laughing. “Your loss is my gain. I won’t try to stop you.”

Mason shook his head. Brad was right. He was a moron. A moron who was never going to see Emily again. The thought should have inspired a feeling of freedom Mason hadn’t felt since he first met Emily, but instead he felt lost. He didn’t want to be free, not if it meant he couldn’t be with her.

But for her sake, he had to let her go.

Tonight, he realized, would be their last night together. But he wouldn’t tell her he’d be leaving without her—it would ruin their last moments together, when he wanted them to be special. Enjoyable. Not filled with tears and anger.

Who was he kidding? Emily wouldn’t fight for him to stay. She wasn’t the type of woman who’d settle down with a guy like Mason anyway—a convict. A murderer. An escaped prisoner.

She’d do much better with a guy like Brad. Dependable, strong, a pillar of his community. Not expendable like Mason was.

But if tonight would be their last night together, then he had to make it an evening to remember.

The nights were getting warmer, the spring firmly arrived in Potterskill. Flowers blossomed everywhere, wildflowers, Mason imagined, since all available land was used for growing vegetables and fruits.

Mason picked a few select buds, creating a small wildflower bouquet. Knocking on the back bedroom door at Luke and Melissa’s house, Mason creaked the door open. Emily was napping after their dinner of rice and potatoes and a small amount of fish. Still, good food, enough to nourish them. Sitting beside her on the bed, he brushed the flowers against her collarbone, tickling her.

Emily opened her eyes and smiled when she saw the flowers. “Hi,” she whispered.

God, he’d miss her. Miss seeing her beautiful brown eyes.

“Hi,” he whispered back. “I want to go for a midnight swim at the lake.”

“Now?” she asked, sitting up, giggling. The lake was small, maybe two miles around. It could probably be called a pond, he supposed, although everyone in town called it a lake. They had almost fished it clean out before someone recognized that in order to keep the lake stocked they’d need to be careful.

“Will you come with me?” he asked, offering his hand. She took it, smiling.

“Why not,” she said. “It’s not too cold out, and I could use a wash.”

“Me too,” Mason agreed.

They walked hand in hand down the streets, the crickets chirping loudly. Mason had grown to like the sound of crickets—they didn’t really have them in Manhattan. The moonlight gleamed off the surface of the lake, where tiny ripples seemed to glow.

Mason stripped off his shirt and watched as Emily shrugged out of her shirt and pants, shimmying them down her legs. Was this really the last time he’d have the pleasure of seeing her undress? The thought froze him, and Emily frowned.

“What’s wrong?” she asked. “Too cold?”

“No,” he said truthfully. The night was mild, definitely.

“Last one in’s a rotten egg!” she called playfully, running naked to the water’s edge. She threw herself into the lake, shrieking jubilantly as the cold water hit her.

Mason laughed and jumped in after her. It was really cold, but refreshing. Emily’s nipples had hardened to tight buds and he reached out and pinched one, as she squealed and pulled away.

“Not fair!” she said, pulling on his nipple. “Yours are too flat and tiny to get a good pinch on.”

He grinned and pulled her toward him, pressing his body against hers, his cock hard against her thigh under the cold water.

Her body warmed him. They swam out a few laps and swam toward each other once more, drawn to each other like magnets. Kicking his legs, he treaded water, enjoying his weightlessness and hers as well, pulling her around him in a circle.

They played for a while, kicking and splashing, before Mason noticed her shivering. “You’re cold,” he said. “Swim’s over.”

“No, I was having fun,” she protested, but she followed him out of the lake. The warm night air still breezed against their wet skin and Mason shivered, picking up his T-shirt and using it to towel Emily off, rubbing it down her body, watching as fat droplets of water clung to the black curls over her mound.

“Your turn,” she said, pulling his shirt out of his hand and rubbing it down his chest. When she got to his cock he groaned, the fabric sliding over his length, teasing him. He grabbed her, pulling her against his chest, warming her with his body heat.

Her lips tasted like sugar. He couldn’t get enough, never enough to last him for the rest of his life. And that’s what tonight needed to be… He had to take his fill of Emily so he’d never need to be with her again. So he could leave her in the safety and security of the town, with food and a man who would marry her and take care of her.

But as her hand wrapped around his cock, he pushed against her, needing more. It was pure selfishness, he knew, to want her to leave with him. On the road, he could not guarantee that she’d be okay. That she’d eat. That she wouldn’t die from exposure or bandits or anything else out on the road. If he loved her, he had to let her go.

And he loved her.

Mason gasped as her grip tightened right when that thought went through his mind. He couldn’t love her, it was impossible. He was a loner, always had been. There was no way after only a few weeks of being with Emily he’d managed to fall in love with her.

But why else would he want to keep her with him so badly?

Emily sensed Mason’s mind drifting and she gripped his cock, sliding her hand over it. What was he thinking about? He’d been distant all evening, playing and swimming, yes, but barely speaking. Had she done something wrong?

His muscular chest gleamed in the moonlight, but gooseflesh covered his naked torso. “Mason,” she whispered. “Let’s make a fire. We can warm up a bit and hang out here for a while longer before we go back.”

He tilted his head to one side as if it took him a few seconds to comprehend what she said. Laughing, she let go of his cock so he could hear her better.

“Um, come on,” she giggled. “Fire.”

He nodded, laughing. “Sure.”

There were several areas by the lakefront where people had set up stone circles for fires and picnics, so Mason had no problem adding some twigs for kindling and using his flint to spark a flame.

Emily thought it was impressive Mason had a flint to make fire with. He’d looted it from a camping store within days of his prison escape so he wouldn’t have to rely on matches or a lighter. More than a year later, that was a still a wise decision.

The fire warmed them, and Emily sat naked on Mason’s T-shirt. Mason was still quiet. Too quiet.

“Mason,” she said. “Something’s wrong with you. Tell me.”

“Nothing’s wrong,” he said, shaking his head. The flames danced in his blue eyes and she had to force herself not to get lost in them.

Taking his hand, she kissed his palm softly. “Are you mad at me?”

He looked genuinely surprised at her question. “Why would you ask me that?”

“Because—well, I think Brad flirted with me and I didn’t do much to stop him or make it clear we’re together.”

Mason got very still. “We’re not together, Emily. And if Brad flirts with you, that’s fine. He’s a good guy. You could do worse.”

Tears filled Emily’s eyes. Of course. She had been stupid to think just because Mason took her up on her offer to sleep with him in exchange for his protection that they were a couple. What did that even mean, anyway, in their post-Pulse world?

Nothing. It meant nothing, just like the men Jenna whored with meant nothing to her.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “I didn’t mean to make you cry.”

The tears streamed down her face and she sniffed, rubbing her nose with the back of her hand. “I’m not crying,” she said, then laughed at the ridiculousness of her statement.

Mason leaned forward, kissing her tears off her cheek, finally landing his kiss on her lips. She tasted the salt from her tears on his tongue.

“I would never want to make you cry,” he said. “Never.”

“I just—it was stupid of me to say anything. About us being together. Of course we’re not together.”

Mason’s eyebrows furrowed but he said nothing.

“And…” Emily said, searching his blue eyes for his thoughts, trying to gauge his feelings by his expression, but she couldn’t. “I shouldn’t have said anything. So forget the whole thing. Let’s enjoy this moment for what it is.”

His expression lightened as if a weight had been taken off his shoulders. Of course. That was it… He must be worried she was in too deep, and he just wanted to have fun. So now they could enjoy themselves again, now that Emily made it clear she understood it was only for the moment, and not forever.

Nothing was forever.

But in that moment, he kissed her so deeply all rational thought flew from her mind. She moaned and arched her body against his, gasping as he pulled her onto his lap so she straddled him. They both sat upright, her legs wrapped around his waist.

His cock pressed insistently against her inner thigh, nudging her, and she held it in her palm, pressing it against her clitoris. Rising up with her thighs, her movements caused his cock to rub her in exactly the right place.

He groaned and grabbed her hips, helping her rise and lower herself, his cock still not inside her pussy, sliding up and down across her slick folds, swelling her clit until she felt she’d explode if he didn’t fuck her soon.

“Please,” she begged, and he slid inside her aching cunt, filling her completely. She rocked back and forth, letting his cock hit her G-spot over and over again. “More, I need more.”

He grabbed hold of her hips, his fingertips digging into her skin. Lifting her up until he almost popped out of her pussy, he then slammed her back down again, thrust into her to the hilt. She gasped as he did it again.

“You like that?” he asked, his cock twitching inside her.

“I love it,” she said, and she felt him freeze again.

“What?” he asked quietly, as if he hadn’t heard her.

“I said, I love your cock,” she repeated.

“Oh.” He didn’t say anything further.

He probably thought I said I love you, she realized.

Gyrating her hips, she reached around to her side and peeled his fingers from her waist, thrusting his hand down between their bodies. “Touch me,” she whispered.

He rubbed her clit, flicking it repeatedly as she rocked, throwing her head back in ecstasy. If all they had was this moment, then that’s what she would take. Tomorrow would take care of tomorrow. Pleasure coursed through her as the orgasm hit her full force, her pussy clenching down on his cock.

Mason groaned and bucked his hips up to meet hers, thrusting harder, coming deep inside her, filling her with the hot jet of his ejaculation.

He hugged her close, his heart beating so hard she could feel the thud against her breast. She didn’t want the embrace to end, but she knew it had to eventually. If she stayed in his arms too long he wouldn’t be able to believe her when she said she just wanted to be with him in the moment, and her saying that seemed to be the only thing that brightened his mood that evening.

Was she so awful to imagine being with, being together? Mason lay down on his back, staring up at her as she straddled his hips. She smiled down at him.

“You’re so beautiful,” he said. He stared so long at her she felt herself blushing, becoming uncomfortable under his direct gaze. She looked away, into the dancing flames of the fire, rather than see him watch her so closely.

“No,” he whispered. “Look at me.”

It took every ounce of willpower she had to turn back to him, to see him watching her.

“Emily,” he said, sliding his hand once more between her thighs, his thumb coming to rest on her clit.

She nodded, already squirming against his thumb, the delectable pressure building within her immediately. He groaned as her movements rubbed against his cock, but he continued, circling her clit slowly with his fingers, teasing her with alternating fast and slow rhythms.

“I love watching you come,” he said, and she felt the wave of another climax start to fall over her, the blood rushing in her ears, pounding throughout her body in time with her quickened pulse as he positioned his cock at her entrance once more and thrust inside her.

She gasped as he hit her G-spot and came, a gush of cream spilling over his cock, drenching the brown curls of his pubic hair. He sat up suddenly, pushing her onto her back so he lay on top of her, and kissed her deeply as he thrust inside her, pounding into her. Wrapping her legs around his waist, she held on for the ride, never wanting it to end.

His earlier orgasm had increased his staying power, and Emily grinned when he slid out of her and rolled her onto her stomach. Her nipples pressed against the grass, the blades of grass tickling her breasts as he fucked her from behind.

Mason wrapped one arm around her waist so he could finger her clit while he fucked her, and she wiggled in his grasp, enjoying the overstimulation even as she thought she might die from the sensations building within her, threatening to overwhelm her senses.

He grunted, thrusting faster, and she cried out as he came again. She gasped when she realized that just because he had finished didn’t mean he was finished with her. His fingers kept their frenetic pace on her clit, forcing her to a third orgasm that left her shaking, her entire body spasming as the aftershocks quaked through her naked body.

Mason pressed a kiss against the back of her neck, moving her hair off her shoulder. “We should get back,” he said quietly. “And get some sleep.”

“Okay.” Emily accepted his hand as he helped her up, and they both dressed in silence, the only sound the crackling of the twigs in the fire. She helped him douse the fire before they started walking back to Luke and Melissa’s house.

“You like it here, don’t you?” Mason asked.

“I do,” she admitted. “I forgot what it was like to eat well every day when I was at Grand Central. And it’s nice to have my work, even if I overdo it sometimes.”

“You need to be careful about that,” Mason said.

“About what?”

Mason took her hand in his and stared into her eyes. “Promise me you won’t work yourself to death. Don’t let that happen. Don’t let them take advantage of you. They got along fine without you before, remember that. When you need a break or you need rest, the only one who’s going to make sure that happens is you. Set the precedent now, you know what I mean?”

“I see what you’re saying,” Emily said, shaking her head. “But it’s irrelevant anyway since we have to leave tomorrow, right?”

“I can’t always be looking out for you.”

Emily cringed at his words. The things she said scared him away, she could tell. He obviously wasn’t interested in being with her like that, and her comments, in that scenario, were just awkward. “I know,” she whispered.

He grabbed her in a bear hug, nearly crushing her with the intensity of his embrace. “I—I’ve grown to really…” He paused, then shook his head. “I care about you, that’s all.”

She nodded, unsure what that meant. “Thank you,” she whispered back.

That night they fell asleep in each other’s arms.

In the morning, he was gone.

23

EMILY woke up at daybreak, alone. She sat up, rubbing the sleep from her eyes, and looked around the small room. Mason wasn’t there.

Slipping on her jeans and tattered sneakers, she stepped out into the early morning air and headed toward the outhouse. She didn’t find him on the way there, either. Had he gone out for a walk? It wasn’t something he normally did.

She headed back toward Luke and Melissa’s house. She could see through the open drapes that Melissa was up with the baby, walking around the living room with the baby over her shoulder. She hadn’t had any health problems since that first night when Emily came to help, thank goodness.

“Emily.”

Emily turned in surprise at the deep male voice behind her. It was the man from church. Brad.

“Good morning,” she said, her voice sounding unnatural to her ears. “I was just heading back to the house.” He didn’t seem like the type of man she had to be worried about attacking her, but her time at Grand Central had taught her never to assume what type of person anyone was.

Brad reached his hand out to stop her and her heart fell into her stomach. She felt faint. Was he going to hurt her? Rape her? Her knees trembled and Brad took his hand off her arm.

“I didn’t mean to scare you,” he apologized. “I’m here about Mason.”

Oh no no no. “Is he okay?” she asked. “Is Mason hurt?” Horrible scenarios flitted through her head. What if Mason had gone out for a morning swim, gotten a cramp, and drowned? What if he tried to help somebody lift something and got crushed? A low moan escaped her lips.

“Mason’s okay,” Brad said. “He left this morning.”

“What do you mean, left?”

“He left, Emily. I’m sorry.”

That couldn’t be right. Where did he go? Where could he have gone? And why, why would he leave her?

Brad handed her a folded piece of paper. It was tattered, since the only paper available was made before the Pulse. No one had taken the time to make new paper the old-fashioned way. He had written on the back of one of those value-pack coupons that used to come in the mail, and often went straight into her garbage.

Dear Emily,

I know you’re probably pissed off at me for leaving. I had to go. You’ll be fine here. There’s food and shelter and a life I can’t give you. Stay where you are, where you’ll be safe. I don’t want you coming with me if it means you’ll be in danger.

Brad’s a good guy. He’ll take care of you. As much as I hate to see you with another man, if he says he’ll marry you then do it. It’s for the best.

Love,

Christopher Mason

Emily had to read the note three times before she finally sat down on the ground. He had written the word Love and then crossed it out, scribbling over the word like it had been a mistake. Must have been, for him to leave her. For him to tell her to marry Brad, a perfect stranger. She looked up at Brad, suspicion forming in her mind.

“How do I know he wrote this?” she asked.

“I admit, I read it,” Brad said. “I know it was meant for your eyes but I had it in my possession all night, so… But I don’t know if he said anything in there I wouldn’t have known. I do know that he asked me, before he left, if I would take care of you. And I said yes.” He looked at the ground as if he were embarrassed.

“I see,” she said quietly. “You guys never thought to include me in this discussion about who I should live with?”

Brad looked positively mortified. “I told him you wouldn’t go for it. That we can’t just arrange a marriage like it was the olden days or something. It’s America, I told him that.”

Emily shook her head, furious. “I can’t believe that asshole,” she muttered. “Leaving me here.”

“May I?” Brad took the letter from her. He pointed to Mason’s words. “He only left because he cares. He wants you to be safe and fed.” He lifted her chin with his large hand, looking down into her eyes. “I like you, Emily. And I’d like to get to know you better, if you’ll let me.”

She pulled away from his kind eyes. “No, I won’t let you. I don’t want anyone but Mason. But he…” She broke off in a sob. “He obviously doesn’t want me. Because he left.” Tears ran down her cheeks, and she made no attempt to stop crying. She felt she might never stop crying, ever again.

Brad looked uncomfortable, but he handed her a handkerchief. She took it, blowing her nose noisily. “I scared him away,” she said, dabbing at her face.

She should have known something was up, last night when he acted so distant. When he told her they weren’t together. Of course. He was breaking up with her, giving her one last pity fuck before he walked out forever.

Well, fuck him.

No. She sobbed again, not caring what Brad thought of her display of emotion. Mason had left her because he could live without her, and she could live without him—she’d grown as a person and become more self-reliant since she’d met him. She didn’t need to be with him but she wanted to be with him—and that was the difference.

What could she do now? He was gone. It wasn’t like she could call his cell, tell him off for leaving her without even talking to her. Why had he done that?

Probably because he didn’t want to give her a chance to convince him to take her with him. But it wasn’t fair—if he truly did care about her, then he should let her make her own decisions. Unless he left because he was sick of her, tired of protecting her, and this was his one chance to be done with her without feeling guilty.

Well, if that was the case then he had to tell her to her face. Because if Mason thought he could hand her off to some random guy then he was dead wrong. It didn’t matter that Brad happened to be a nice, handsome guy who could probably do a good job of looking after her. She didn’t need looking after… not anymore. What she needed—no, what she wanted—was him. She wanted Mason, because she loved him.

The thought stopped her cold.

I love Mason.

She loved his fierce independent streak. She loved his survival skills that enabled him to survive on his own in New York City. She loved that he cared enough about his sister getting justice that he killed her attacker—and that he killed to protect Emily too.

Things that would have terrified the old Emily—the pre-Pulse Emily—were now the very things that made Mason exactly the sort of man she wanted to spend the rest of her life with. She loved how his touch made her body come alive, how he made her climax over and over again, how he made her feel soft and feminine even when she was dirty and unkempt.

She even loved that he cared for her enough to give her up. Of course, when she found him, she’d tear him a new one for that. If she found him.

“Brad,” Emily said, looking up. “I can’t stay here. I have to go find Mason.”

He shook his head. “He’ll freak out if you leave here. You know that.”

“I don’t really care,” she said bluntly. “I’m leaving.”

She turned to walk back to Luke and Melissa’s house to get her things. She had to hurry if she wanted to find him. Who knew how far ahead he had gotten? Mason was slowed down by her, she knew. So without her, he had probably gone a lot farther. But where? What direction should she go?

“Brad, do you know where he went?” she called over her shoulder.

He shook his head.

This wasn’t going to be easy. But if she truly loved him, then she’d rather die trying to find him than live her life without him.

He might be angry with her for coming after him, but at this point she didn’t even care. Let him be angry. She was angry too. And if he didn’t want her to stick around, then tough—because once she found him, she sure as hell wasn’t going to leave his side ever again

If she found him.

Mason headed north on I-87, walking with one thought going through his head over and over like a mantra: don’t look back.

If he looked back, he’d turn back. If he turned back, he’d go get Emily and take her from the safety of the town. He couldn’t do that to her, not when he couldn’t promise her the same protection she’d have living there.

But leaving her behind was killing him from the inside out. He felt like he swallowed something too big and it stuck in his chest. He swallowed hard around the lump, trying to focus on putting one foot in front of the other.

Keep walking. Don’t look back.

He only briefly considered going to New York City. It had been his home for so long, and he knew how to survive there… but now he knew there was a better life. Seeing how Potterskill, as hard hit as it had been, thrived after the Pulse made the conditions at Grand Central seem even more horrific.

If he kept moving forward, maybe he could find his own place. That’s what he was used to anyway—being alone. The thought should have made him feel better, but instead the idea of spending the rest of his life in what used to be blessed solitude now seemed like a life sentence. It was as if he had never escaped prison after all.

Don’t look back.

Mason shook his head, forcing himself to keep going. But Emily… God, he missed her already. Missed her beautiful face, her engaging conversation, even her teasing and giggling. He missed making love to her—and it had only been a few long hours since they had been together by the lake. How would he go a lifetime without kissing her lips again, without feeling her body beneath his?

She’d be okay, though. She’d be better than okay. Mason wasn’t even sure what he was going to eat later that day, or where he’d sleep. If she were with him, he’d be endangering her life. He couldn’t do that to her. Brad Crimshaw would take care of her.

Oh God. The mere thought of Brad touching his woman made him sick to his stomach. But he couldn’t very well expect her to join a nunnery after only knowing Mason for a few weeks. It wasn’t like she even thought of them as a couple. She said so herself at the lake.

She had made it quite clear, actually, that they were just together for that moment. Hearing her say that had made it slightly easier to let her go. But only slightly.

Don’t look back.

Emily walked up to the main highway outside Potterskill. She could feel the cold steel of the pistol in the small of her back, secure in the waistband of her jeans. It made her feel safer, knowing she had it. Just in case.

There were two guards at the road, guarding the entrance to Potterskill from the other side of the highway. She waved at them.

“Did you see that new guy Mason go this way, a few hours ago?”

The two men looked at each other. One said, “He told us we never saw him.” Then he grinned at her. She scowled. So Mason really tried to hide from her, huh?

And at least now she knew he’d headed north on the highway. How could she ever catch up to him, though, if he was several hours, and many miles, ahead? Surely if he stopped to camp he’d hide in the woods off the side of the road. She’d never find him.

But she had to try, or she’d never forgive herself.

Luke and Melissa had packed her a sandwich for the road, which was kind of them. They told her to come back if she couldn’t find him. Emily hoped she wouldn’t have to take them up on her offer, as nice as they were.

She wanted to be with Mason.

The road curved around the hills of upstate New York, and it was slow going. Her feet ached and she’d only been walking for a few hours. The sun hung low in the sky, reminding her that she’d have to find shelter for the night, and soon. She didn’t want to be caught out at night.

“Going somewhere?” the voice sounded raw and greasy, and definitely male. Emily gasped with surprise and looked to her left, where she heard the voice. But she couldn’t see anyone.

She grabbed her gun and pointed it in the general direction. “Show yourself,” she said, using all her strength to keep her voice from shaking. She sounded confident, and the steel she heard in her own voice made her feel safer.

She cocked the gun.

The guy laughed and stepped out from behind a stalled truck, holding his hands up. He was big, almost as tall as Mason, and walking toward her with a bravado only guys who think they’re invincible have. He stepped toward her and Emily lowered her gun since he appeared unarmed.

“There’s a toll, lady,” the man said. “If you want to keep going this way.”

“What are you talking about, a toll?” she demanded.

“You gotta give me something if you want to keep going this way,” he repeated, shrugging his shoulders. “Whatcha got? Something in that bag of yours?” He took another step toward her and Emily hoisted her gun up again.

“Step back, asshole,” she said.

He laughed again. “Shoot me for all I care. No big deal.”

What was going on? The guy had to be suicidal, which made him dangerous. He had nothing to lose.

“I have nothing in my bag,” she lied.

The man grabbed the bag out of her hands and she gasped, aiming the gun at his chest. “Give it back.”

“No. Shoot me if it means that much to you,” he said. The man pulled out her sandwich and took it. Looking at her, he calmly took a big bite. Then another. Then, to her surprise, he put the sandwich back in her bag and handed it back to her. “Go on now,” he said. “And watch out, because there’s a mean-looking dude camped a couple miles up the road.”

Mean-looking dude?

“Was he wearing cargo pants and a rifle slung over his shoulder?” she asked.

“Yup. That’s the one.”

24

Grand Central Terminal

JENNA

Jenna watched in horror as the soldiers dragged Taryn in front of Colonel Lanche. The soldiers had kept Taryn locked up somewhere at Grand Central, awaiting sentencing.

Colonel Lanche apparently didn’t like to execute people on Sundays.

“So you’re the girl who killed my soldier,” he spat, glowering at Taryn.

Taryn glared back, staring defiantly. She’d had two long nights of waiting. Jenna imagined it would have been kinder of the army to kill her straight off and get it over with. She choked back a sob.

Lanche turned to the man holding Taryn. “Tell us what happened.”

“We heard a shot, and came into a subway car to see Private Eric Andrews shot to death on top of a whore.” The soldier found Jenna in the crowd and pointed to her. “That whore. And this whore here,” he said, pushing Taryn forward, “held the smoking gun.”

Lanche shook his head. He looked into the crowd that had gathered. “This is my camp,” he screamed. “Do you really think you can get away with murder?” A vein bulged in his forehead.

The man was losing it, Jenna realized. Losing his hold on the citizens of the FEMA camp and losing the respect of the people who had once deemed him a savior.

“Were there any witnesses?” he asked.

The soldier gestured to Jenna. “She saw her friend shoot him.”

Jenna shook her head, unable to speak. She wouldn’t incriminate Taryn, not if she could help it.

Taryn looked at Jenna, her red-rimmed eyes calm. She seemed serene now, like she’d made peace with what had happened. “Tell them, Jenna. Tell them what Emily said about the radio.”

She heard Lanche make a strangled noise in the back of his throat.

Jenna looked at her friend and nodded, perspiration beading on her upper lip. She had to speak quickly before she was shut up—permanently. But as Jenna opened her mouth to spread the truth, Colonel Lanche lifted his rifle and pointed it at her.

“Go, Jenna, go!” Taryn cried. “Get out of here—don’t let them catch you too.”

Jenna didn’t even think; she turned and ran, zigzagging through the crowd. She heard Taryn screaming at the top of her lungs, “There’s a better life! There’s a radio, and America is rebuilding.”

The crowd murmured loudly amongst themselves, repeating what she said. Jenna could hear the wonderment in their voices, echoing behind her as she ran, ran through them all. “Get out of Grand Central,” Taryn cried, “and find a better life.”

A shot rang out, deafening in Jenna’s ears.

Jenna stopped in her tracks, the front exit from Grand Central just steps away in front of her, a ragged cry torn from her throat. Taryn’s tirade had been silenced. No more screams. Oh God, Jenna thought. No no no, it couldn’t . . . But she knew it had. Lanche had executed Taryn, right then and there in Grand Central Terminal, under the clock by the information booth where so many other public hearings were done.

Jenna wanted to turn back—wanted to run back up to Lanche, to shoot him with his own gun. Wanted to see Taryn’s body one last time before it went into a mass grave, an unfitting burial for such a beautiful young woman. A woman who tried, in her final moments, to save everyone at the Grand Central military camp. To free them from the tyranny they had been living under for the past year, living like animals. To free the women who prostituted themselves on the Tracks for a meal.

“Oh Taryn,” she whispered. “I’m so sorry.”

EMILY

Emily kept her eyes peeled for smoke rising in the trees as she walked up 87, now two miles past the toll. It seemed to take forever, and the sun was setting dangerously fast. If she was wrong and she wasn’t tracking Mason, but another man, she’d have a serious problem when she walked in on his camp.

Hell, she’d have a serious problem even if it was Mason, considering he’d tried to ditch her.

But she needed to talk to him first.

She saw the light from the fire not far off the side of the road. Walking slowly, she drew near, close enough to feel the heat from the flames. Mason was nowhere in sight.

A voice came from behind a tree. “Stay back,” he said.

She froze, putting her hands in the air. “Mason?” she called. “It’s me. Emily.”

Mason stepped out from behind the tree, lowering his rifle. “Jesus, Emily, I nearly shot you.”

She lowered her arms. He looked angry.

“I’m sorry,” she said. Wait a minute. No she wasn’t—she was angry. And it was time to let him know that. “Mason, what you did wasn’t right.”

He looked flabbergasted. “What? Leaving you behind? It was the only right thing I’ve ever done. I can’t promise you security, not like what you had in the town.” He stepped toward her, staring down into her eyes with his deep blue ones.

“I don’t care,” she said. “You can’t make a decision like that for me.”

He sighed. “I see what this is about.”

Did he? Could he tell she’d fallen in love with him? Something told her he’d be scared off even further if she admitted the truth to him.

He looked at her, a serious expression on his face. “You’re proving a point. I get that. But you didn’t have to endanger your life to show me that you’re an independent woman.”

“Maybe I wanted to,” she said, sitting down by the fire. “And that’s my prerogative.”

“Well, you screwed up,” he said hotly. “Because now I have to take you back to town.”

Emily jumped up again. “Mason, no!” She touched his jawline, the stubble growing thick and coarse. “I want to stay with you. Please, please let me stay with you. I won’t slow you down, I swear.”

Mason laughed quietly. “Yes, you will. But I don’t care about that anymore. I want your company—God knows I do—but you made me promise to protect you. At this point, the best protection I can give you is not with me. It’s back in the town, with Brad.”

She scowled. “That’s another thing, you jerk,” she said. “How could you give me to another man? I’m not yours to give away!”

He winced at her words. “That wasn’t my intention, not at all.”

“So you were just content to see me be with another guy? That didn’t bother you?” She shook her head, all the anger draining out of her. Sadness filled its place. He really didn’t care about her, not past the promise he had made her after she had saved his life.

His feelings on the subject, she realized, were painfully clear.

“I’m sorry I came back when you don’t want me here,” she whispered.

Suddenly Mason’s mouth was on hers with a ferocity that left her breathless. “Does this feel like I don’t want you here?” he asked, kissing her again.

She couldn’t answer, not when she knew the truth. He had left her, and his actions spoke louder than his words ever could. But she loved him—and she’d take whatever he had to offer her, even if he couldn’t return her feelings. His mouth was hot against hers, his tongue deep in her mouth, tasting her, and she let herself forget everything except for the kiss.

He kissed down her neck, pulling her into his muscular arms, enfolding her against his chest. She couldn’t imagine being with any other man. She only wanted Mason, even if that meant she had to live on the streets and starve.

But would he understand that? Even if he did, his chivalry wouldn’t let him allow her to do that. But she wasn’t going to let him decide her future.

Emily dropped to her knees before him, tugging his pants down, freeing his hard cock. He inhaled sharply as she wrapped her lips around the head of his cock, sucking it into her mouth. She had to show him how much she wanted to be with him, so he could understand.

Swallowing around his length, she took more of him in, loving the power it gave her to control his sensations. His hands tangled in her hair and drew her in even closer.

“Emily,” he breathed, and she licked the underside of his shaft, tasting his musky, salty taste. “You can stay,” he said. “Stay with me.”

He came then, exploding into her mouth. She swallowed hard, sucking him, licking the little slit at the tip to make sure she got every last pearly drop.

She looked up at him, smiling. He looked down at her, and at the same time they each said to the other, “Thank you.”

She giggled, standing up. “So I can stay? Really?”

He nodded, hugging her close. “Yes. I shouldn’t be so selfish, but I want you here with me. God forgive me.”

“I’m glad,” she whispered. “I want to be here with you too. I don’t care about the security the town gave. I’m happier here… with you.”

“I haven’t got any food for dinner,” he said softly.

Emily smiled and pulled her sandwich out of her pack, two large bites missing from the guy who took the toll. “We can split this,” she said.

Sitting by the fire, slowly chewing the half of the sandwich, Mason looked at her. He was so handsome, even covered in stubble and dirt. “My goal is to find someplace in the woods with lots of hunting and wood for fire, and make a permanent shelter. Someplace where we can plant and grow food. Does that sound like something you’d be interested in?” He asked casually, but Emily could tell her answer was important to him.

“Absolutely,” she said, no hesitation in her voice. “If we could find a pond or little lake too, that would be good. We’ll need water.”

Mason’s eyes lit up. “Good point. There’re tons of lakes in upstate New York. I’m sure we can find something.”

She nodded.

“But Emily,” he said, his eyes solemn, “if I can’t take care of you properly then I—”

“Don’t even say it,” she interrupted him. “You don’t have my permission to make decisions on my behalf. We’ll take care of each other, as equals. I need to know we’re in this together.” She said the last part quietly, but Mason still heard her, she could see.

He nodded. “Okay.”

“Unless,” she said, looking up uncomfortably, “you change your mind and don’t want me around. If you don’t want me to stay with you then I can’t force you to. But you have to be honest with me—don’t just keep saying it’s for my own good, because I’m not buying that.”

Mason laughed, a deep belly laugh, and tackled her to the grassy forest floor. “Got it.”

She stripped her shirt off, desperate to feel his skin against hers. He pulled his T-shirt off over his head, throwing it to the side, pulling his pants down again, setting his pistol next to them. Emily set her gun to the side as well so she could unzip her jeans, tugging them down.

He thrust his cock inside her so quickly she gasped.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “Did I hurt you?”

She grabbed his ass, holding him in place deep within her, bucking her hips up to meet his thrusts. “Keep going,” she said. “Fuck me hard.”

He pounded into her as she held on tightly, her fingernails digging into the muscles on his back, needing more of him, needing all of him.

Every muscle in her body tensed and spasmed as the orgasm overtook her senses, making her body writhe beneath his. He continued stroking deep inside her, drawing her climax out, lengthening it, pulling aftershocks from her quivering body as she cried out for more.

Mason pumped one last time, hard, spilling his seed deep within her, her pussy clamping down on his cock. He grunted and fell on top of her, breathing hard into her disheveled hair.

“Don’t leave me again,” she whispered. But she knew he wasn’t making any promises this time.

The following morning, Mason and Emily walked, together, up the highway. Mason knew he should be upset with Emily for leaving the safety of the town, but damn it was good to have her with him again.

He’d always been a loner, but she’d changed him. Permanently. Now he needed to create a life for them where he wouldn’t be worried she’d be better off with anyone else.

Then he saw the mailbox.

A small wooden mailbox, shaped like a whimsical bear with a red flag on its hat, was on the side of the road. Turning to the mailbox, he cut across the empty highway, drawn to it by its very out-of-place-ness.

Emily followed him. “What’s that?” she asked, sounding as curious as he felt.

“A mailbox,” he said. “Which means there must be—”

“A house,” she finished. She looked at him and he could tell they were on the same page.

“Come on,” he said, taking her hand. It seemed so tiny in his, but it felt so right. He had been crazy to think he could leave her behind.

There was a gravel driveway, at one point, anyway, underneath the grass and leaves and dirt. Now, after more than a year of neglect, the driveway was practically hidden from sight. Mason could still feel the gravel through the worn soles of his shoes and followed the long, winding path.

Emily was able to keep up easily, since he had learned to slow his strides for her sake. It was more fun to walk next to her than in front of her anyway.

The path continued over a mile deep into the woods.

“Mason.” She tugged at his arm, and he looked over at where she stopped and stared. The sun glinted off of the rippling waters of… a lake.

“Holy shit,” he breathed. “A lake.”

She grinned. “Woods. A lake.” They heard a small scuffle in a tree overhead. “That’s gotta be a squirrel, or a chipmunk, right?” she asked, smiling up into the tree.

“That’s gonna be dinner,” he said, peering through the optic sight on his rifle into the top of the tree. The squirrel was nowhere to be seen, maybe because the prospect of food suddenly paled in comparison to what he could see through the sight of his rifle.

He lowered his aim, using the sight like a telescope, and looked through the clearing in the woods behind the lake.

“Emily,” he whispered.

She stiffened beside him. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong,” he laughed. He dropped his gun and picked her up, swirling her around in excitement. “And everything’s right.”

“What are you talking about?”

A cabin. A small hunting cabin on the lake.

“Come on,” he said, and they trekked around the lake. It was a small lake, maybe a mile around, more of a large pond, but there were geese on the water. The thought of eating goose made his mouth water. Maybe he could breed geese…

They approached the cabin cautiously even though it looked abandoned. An overgrown, weed-filled vegetable garden crept around from the back of the structure, as if the plants, left to their own devices for so long, had taken over.

“Hello?” Mason called, hoping upon hope no one would answer back.

No one did.

“Tomatoes,” Emily whispered reverently at the sight. “Seeds, Mason.”

“I know.” He held his breath, wondering for a moment if he was imagining things. She grinned at him and he knew. It’s for real. This is our home now.

The front door lay open, and the inside was trashed, by black bears or maybe raccoons. Emily’s eyes brightened at the sight. “We can clean this place up,” she said. “Look, there’s a wood-burning stove for heat!”

He grinned at her. There was even an axe, rusted and dull no doubt, in the corner on the floor. “Yes we can,” he said.

“It’s perfect,” she replied, looking around. “It’s everything we wanted.”

“I never thought this would actually happen,” he admitted. “I didn’t know if we’d ever find this.”

“You can’t get rid of me now, you know,” she said, lifting herself up on her tiptoes to reach his lips.

He kissed her, claiming her as his own.“I don’t want to get rid of you. Ever.”

Emily smiled and looked around the little cabin. She picked up some trash off the floor. “Good. Let’s get to work.”

“I’ll go catch us dinner,” he said. “How does goose sound?”

Emily licked her lips in response.

“I’ll take that as a yes.” He stepped out the front door, then turned back around, looking back into the open doorway at Emily, her brown hair falling into her eyes as she leaned over, getting started on cleaning their new home. “I love you, you know,” he said.

He inhaled sharply. Did he say that out loud?

Emily lifted her head, looking up at him in surprise. “Did you just say you loved me?” she asked quietly.

Oh hell. “Yes. I did. I mean, I do.”

She dropped the trash back on the floor and ran up to him, tackling him, throwing her arms around him. “I love you, Mason.”

He’d never heard anything more wonderful in his life.

Kissing her deeply, he dropped her to the ground, determined to show her just how much he loved her before he found something to kill for their dinner.

He loves me, he loves me!

Emily grinned up at Mason, almost unable to believe it. Everything she hoped for, dreamed of, wrapped itself around and hinged on that one fact. Mason loved her, and she loved him. The entire world could fall apart around them, and she wouldn’t care. Wouldn’t even notice.

He stripped his shirt off, tossing it amongst the leaves strewn across the forest floor. She pressed her palm against the thick wall of heated muscles of his chest, feeling his heart pound beneath her fingers.

His mouth claimed hers, bruising her lips with his ferocity and passion.

“I need you, now,” he whispered, his voice hot in her ear.

“And I need you forever,” she whispered back, smiling up at him. His bright blue eyes held depths of emotion in them. She could get lost in those eyes, and yet she knew she had been found. She’d never be lost again.

He pulled her shirt up over her head, pulling it slowly down her arms, trapping them behind her back. Placing wet kisses all down her neck, his lips trailed to her breasts as she arched forward, desperate for his mouth on her.

She tried to reach her hand forward with the intention of grasping his head to her nipple, but her arms tangled deliciously in her shirt behind her back and all she could do was moan with pleasure as he laughed, smiling mischievously.

“I think I like you a little bound, Emily,” he said, darting his tongue to her waistband. She gasped at his words as his fingers crept up her to her hips, sliding her pants down around her thighs.

A cool breeze wafted across her wet, naked pussy and she groaned, looking up into the treetops surrounding their new home.

“Now I have you exactly how I want you, and I’m going to take my time,” he murmured, his voice vibrating against her nether lips as he slowly parted her folds with his tongue.

A shudder of desire rushed through her as Mason licked her mercilessly, bringing her right to the edge of orgasm before stopping.

“More,” she begged. “Don’t stop.”

“You’re mine forever now, Emily,” he said, sucking her clit full into his mouth. She came hard, her abdominal muscles contracting, her head curling forward as she gasped, panting as he pulled every last bit of her climax from her with thick, strong strokes of his tongue.

“I’m yours,” she breathed.

He lowered his pants and mounted her, crushing her beneath his muscular torso as he thrust deep within her. The world around them disappeared, and all that was left was Mason and their love for each other. Nothing else mattered.

As long as she had his love, she’d never need anything else.

Jenna looked back over her shoulder at the main terminal in Grand Central. Taryn’s last words rung in Jenna’s ears, swirling through her mind.

Get out of Grand Central… and find a better life.

The front door lay unguarded, the heavy brass handles shimmering with invitation. No soldiers blocked her path. It was now or never.

Jenna opened the door, and stepped out into the bright sunlight.

Into a brand new world.

Acknowledgments

The first draft of The Pulse was written during National Novel Writing Month, aka NaNoWriMo, in 2010. Thank you to my literary agent, Courtney Miller-Callihan of Sanford J. Greenburger Associates, for believing in my book enough to take me on as a client, and thank you to Kate Dresser, formerly of Gallery Books, and Lauren McKenna, for acquiring it. Thank you to my editors Julia Fincher and Adam Wilson at Pocket Star, along with the whole Gallery/Pocket team for working with me to make the Pulse Trilogy the best it could be. Thank you to my family for supporting me in my writing career. I love you, DH!

And for you, my readers, I love you too—without you, I’d be writing into the abyss.

To find out when my next book releases, please sign up for my mailing list on my website at ShoshannaEvers.com, follow me on Twitter @ShoshannaEvers, and on Facebook at facebook.com/shoshanna.evers. Let’s stay in touch!

Content

The Pulse
The Pulse Trilogy - 1
by
Shoshanna Evers

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

8

9

10

11

12

13

14

15

16

17

18

19

20

21

22

23

24

Acknowledgments